I have a 15 year old who finally weaned off meds a couple months ago. He still has this but we are working with him to self regulate. He's not high risk for deviant behaviors as he also has aspergers.

I'm writing because my 13 year old son has a much more severe form, borderlines on psychotic. He's on multiple medications just to function. He's had 3 trips to inpatient psych where he manipulates the staff and ****** off the doctors to where they said next time they want him to go to jail, not psych.

Here's the issue. When he takes his meds he's "normal". He's just started refusing the last few weeks. We have had some awful days and they ED room teacher can't even handle him off his meds. Last night I got hurt trying to just keep him in his room so he didn't affect his brothers. I'm divorced, their dad has this too (IMO).

How do you get a big strong 13 year old to take their meds? I'm at a loss. Last night he finally did but only because I said I wouldn't leave him alone until he took them and he was tired and angry and finally did it.

Can we get shots to give them? Does anyone have ideas? He's too smart to bribe, he doesn't take the bait. Up until a few weeks ago he was the kid who knew how badly he needed them and always remembered on his own. I think puberty is playing a huge part of this.

Any ideas are welcome.

Christine

Hi,

Remember it is important to keep yourself and the rest of the household safe. Do not try to force him to do something.

I do think that he might not have the right medications. Often, with adults, if people are on their medications, they are willing to keep taking them. Get him a better psychiatrist if you can.


M

Try talking to him, about why he doesn't want to take the medicines
now.

I didn't learn till many years later what some of the side effects
my son's had with some of their medicines were.

I wish I'd been able to listen better. Or they had been able
to tell me better.

Also it sounds like something is going on with the classroom,
you need to call a meeting. And make sure things are all in
place. They are trained to handle him. So make sure all things
that can be done are being done.


I'm a parent advocate in the state of Indiana. And each state
has parent advocates that can help parents. If you need
the link for your state let me know.

You can put a message to me here. Or ask me to let you Private
message me.

Donna

Well we are considerably past some of the ideas but we have done those and sometimes helpful. His ability to manipulate adults is beyond what most can even fathom. I've done my own advocating for 12 years, I got him in the ED class after a lot of sitting on school officials. He only cooperates if he gets a reward. He broke things, vandalized my house and attacked me twice this weekend. Police were finally called.

They are recommending boarding school or making him a ward of the state. The psych unit won't allow him there anymore because he manipulated all the staff, teen girls and was super charming and well behaved when confronted(a game he plays).

So we are talking to boarding schools, we don't like the ward idea at all. For now he has zero privileges until he cooperates with meds. Calling psych in the morning, clearly meds stopped working. We'be split him from his siblings so he can't manipulate me and his dad by going after them.

It's not my favorite way to go but he is 40% disorder and 60% deliberate and calculated behavior. So we are doing all we can to allow the situation to remain calm and not give him space to play games. The teacher is struggling because he is being dangerous in the classroom.

We will get thru this but he has clearly stated he wants to stop meds only because he doesn't think he needs them anymore. After this weekend its clear he does but he cant see it. Sad to watch this go down, he's such a bright, creative, talented, good kid but he has to take his meds.

Thanks all

Keep talking to us. I totally can relate.

I have a now 30 year old. That at almost 16, ended up in a boarding school.
After trying to throw his 3 year younger brother, into a wall. In a chair.

He was placed by our county, he went to a juvenile place for 3 months, and
was assesed by the state. But our county chose to take all the time I had
spent getting him help. And placed him in the juvenile, place that could
redo his medicines and get a psychiatrist that could help.

He was there for 6 months, because the psychiatrist found the right medication. It was supposed to be a year.

We got stuck with all the bills. But I am sure it saved my son's life. I was
sure that he would kill someone by 18 if not for this.

He now has a job and a family. And is doing great.

THe only thing I did when he was dismissed, was I requested the judge
order the psychiatrist treat him. See I didn't want to start over. And she
wouldn't be allowed to keep him, if he didn't . So he did. She gave us
evening apptments.

Donna

I appreciate all the input here. I'm always hopeful that he can turn it around. I guess he spent the entire day at dads telling him how its going to be. Going to run away, not going to stay at dads, etc.

He hasn't hurt his brothers yet but has threatened enough times.

Well tomorrow ought to be interesting.

Thank you again

I'm glad he could spend the day at his dad's and talk through it.

Its okay to talk it. Just as long as he doesn't do it.

You have your hands full. We will be hear to listen.


I do want to say one more thing. I never thought my two son's would
be good friends after that. They had fought for years. See I have
a younger son that has epilepsy and my middle son protected him too.

But the last at least 5 years they have been very good friends.

They now work at the same place. My oldest son was a lot of the
reason my younger son got on there I believe.

So there is hope for everything. So you are right not to give up.

Donna

So far separating him is giving us all a break. He will see brothers on weekends. I'm trying to find better placement here before we opt to move him down south.

He's back on meds and stabilizing again. Still doing no school work and the school doesn't care. I did tell them harping would do no good but now we can't get principal to reply .

Found a "non public" ED school, going to fight for it, they work on executive functioning and a host of other things with education.

Budget here is shot. My only hope is the best ed class here failed.

Contact the Director of the special education dept along with the principal.
To get a case conference or what ever they call it in your state set up.

Donna