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Old 01-13-2013, 10:31 PM #1
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Confused 32y/o mother with 12 y/o bipolar son w/ multiple other diagnosis ......need a friend

I have a 12 y/o son (going on 13 in 2weeks) that has bipolar, ADHD,odd and some other diagnosis. I'm at the point where I need to know I'm not alone and there is light or something at the end of this very dark tunnel. I'm not to proud to admit that I need help dealing with this.
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Old 01-14-2013, 12:11 AM #2
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sanlynn View Post
I have a 12 y/o son (going on 13 in 2weeks) that has bipolar, ADHD,odd and some other diagnosis. I'm at the point where I need to know I'm not alone and there is light or something at the end of this very dark tunnel. I'm not to proud to admit that I need help dealing with this.
People do not read the Parents with Bipolar Children Section.
Post below in this section of Bipolar. These boards are pretty quiet now but you might get some support:

http://neurotalk.psychcentral.com/forum38.html


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Old 01-14-2013, 12:25 AM #3
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sanlynn View Post
I have a 12 y/o son (going on 13 in 2weeks) that has bipolar, ADHD,odd and some other diagnosis. I'm at the point where I need to know I'm not alone and there is light or something at the end of this very dark tunnel. I'm not to proud to admit that I need help dealing with this.
Hi,

Try not to be overwhelmed by the labels.
Most likely he has only one or two diagnoses that are covered by all the others.

1 If he is being medicated for ADHD right now, that is making the the bipolar worse. Bipolar needs to be treated before the ADHD is treated.

2 Take him to a psychiatrist who specializes in pediatric bipolar. If you can, get him the very best child psychiatrist within driving distance for you -- sometimes that is a large regional medical center or medical school.

3 Google "bipolar kids org" to find BPChildren where you can find help for family members.

4 Also, sometimes www.nami.org (National Alliance on Mental Illness) might be active in your area. They are good with families.

It is ok to be scared and overwhelmed. If you can, get some therapy for yourself. Talk therapy can help you deal with what is happening to your son, your family, and yourself. It will help you be in a strong position to help him.

Things do get better. He can get the right psychiatrist and the right medications so that he can feel better. Good luck.

M
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Old 01-14-2013, 10:08 AM #4
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Hi, hoping you will come talk to us in the link that Mari gave you.

There are a few that have children. Some of your children are grown,
as mine are. I have some grandchildren with depession and emotional
issues.

And I am a Parent Advocate that works with lots of families that have
Emotional issues. Many with children with bi-polar.
Donna
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Old 01-25-2013, 04:04 PM #5
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Hi, my name is Tracie I am new here and have a 9 year old with Bipolar, ADHD and learning disabilities that are still being tested. I am also here for help on learning new strategies on discipline and coping with stressful times I also could use a friend feel free to message me and ask questions of give any pointers. Thank you for reading, Tracie
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Old 01-27-2013, 11:25 AM #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sanlynn View Post
I have a 12 y/o son (going on 13 in 2weeks) that has bipolar, ADHD,odd and some other diagnosis. I'm at the point where I need to know I'm not alone and there is light or something at the end of this very dark tunnel. I'm not to proud to admit that I need help dealing with this.

I have a 15 year old son who was diagnosed as bipolar and ADD last April. I am a single mom working 3rd shift. His father is not in the picture at all. I don't even know where he is. We've been divorced for 14 years. My son and I have always been close and we get along very good. But recently he has gone thru some really bad mood swings and problems at school and has had to be put on homebound school. Social settings seem to cause him a lot of anxiety. Between work, doctor's appointments, therapy, and orthodontist appointments I am starting to feel overwhelmed. His doctors just can't seem to understand that I don't have enough days in the week to do everything they suggest. I don't have time to take him to the local community college to take classes for a hobby like cooking or art. I have already given up my college education because it won't fit in my schedule anymore.I have no time for myself and sometimes I catch myself thinking that I wish he would hurry up and get grown. Then I feel terrible because I love him very much and we have a better relationship than a lot of parents and teens do. Some days I just feel so bitter because his father has left all of the responsibility on me and I have no one to turn to. It is a very dark tunnel and it has taken me almost a year to realize that I need help. Some days I have trouble making myself do things like laundry and grocery shopping. I get so overwhelmed. Please don't feel ashamed for admitting you need some help. A lot of us are in the same boat and we all need support or we wouldn't be on this forum. You are not alone.

Last edited by Kitty; 01-27-2013 at 11:53 AM. Reason: fixed quote
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Old 01-27-2013, 11:41 AM #7
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I'm new here too. I have a 15 yr old son wth bipolar and ADD. Getting ready to change his meds. I'm a little nervous about it. He seems to have calmed down a lot since I took him out of school. He has social anxiety and his therapist put on homebound school wth a tutor until I can enroll him in an online high school. I still keep firm boundaries and rules. When he was first diagnosed last April I didn't discipline him for anything and he just acted worse. I have found that if I he breaks the rules we both do a lot better if I wait an hour or so until I discipline him. It gives us time to cool down so that we can handle it without screaming at each other and making the situation worse. As for handling my own stress...I'm still trying to figure that one out myself...if you have any good ideas let me know. Hang in there.
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Old 01-27-2013, 12:07 PM #8
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Welcome gsmnp2013

I'm Donna, and I work with families in Indiana that are having problems in school. Homebound is a good alternative, when you are working to change medications. Online schooling is also working very well for lots of my families
with children with emotional and anxiety issues.

If you need help please make a new post. Also the bipolar site is more active. And you will find parents with children in there also. We will talk about what you need too.

Donna
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Old 01-28-2013, 11:12 PM #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by gsmnp2013 View Post
I Between work, doctor's appointments, therapy, and orthodontist appointments I am starting to feel overwhelmed. His doctors just can't seem to understand that I don't have enough days in the week to do everything they suggest. I don't have time to take him to the local community college to take classes for a hobby like cooking or art. I have already given up my college education because it won't fit in my schedule anymore.I have no time for myself and sometimes I catch myself thinking that I wish he would hurry up and get grown. .
Hi,

You do a lot of driving. Can he take the bus? How many more months before the braces come off?

He is fifteen. He needs more responsibility around the house.
He can do his own laundry (and fold his clothes and put them away), keep the kitchen clean, start dinner, take out the trash, and vacuum.
You should ignore his messy bedroom.

Does he have any opportunity to exercise? Exercise helps tremendously with mental health and overall health.

Regarding how to handle your own stress . . . Exercise and get enough sleep. Hire anyone you can to help out with any household or laundry duties.
Do you have your own therapist? You can find someone who is trained in relaxation techniques.
Good luck.

M
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Old 02-02-2013, 01:09 PM #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mari View Post
Hi,

You do a lot of driving. Can he take the bus? How many more months before the braces come off?

He is fifteen. He needs more responsibility around the house.
He can do his own laundry (and fold his clothes and put them away), keep the kitchen clean, start dinner, take out the trash, and vacuum.
You should ignore his messy bedroom.

Does he have any opportunity to exercise? Exercise helps tremendously with mental health and overall health.

Regarding how to handle your own stress . . . Exercise and get enough sleep. Hire anyone you can to help out with any household or laundry duties.
Do you have your own therapist? You can find someone who is trained in relaxation techniques.
Good luck.

M
We started home bound school this week and things are getting better. No more fights about going to school and his mood swings are calming down. We have started taking walks in the evening and getting outside has helped with my stress levels. Still have over a year until the braces come off. We live in a rural area with all of his doctors and dentist over 45 minutes away. No bus service. But since he has started homebound he has a list of chores to do every day and it has helped me out a bunch. I help him with his school work, get some sleep, and when I get up we go for a walk before I fix dinner and get ready for work. I feel like things may be looking up. It also helps to get advice from people like you because it lets me know I'm not alone out here. Thanks for taking the time to send some advice. Send more anytime.
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