I had originally posted in the TBI thread but I think this would be better in BPD now. Here's a quick summary:


I'm a concerned parent of a 25 year old son who was diagnosed with ADD when he was 6 and was on medication for that until his Senior year of high school.

He was attacked in 2007 and received two skull fractures. One in front and one in back. He was airlifted to a hospital after having a series of seizures at the scene of the attack and in the hospital. He was in a drug induced coma for about 4 days in the Neurological ICU while they ran tests and waited for the brain swelling to come down. On the 5th day they had him out of the coma and on the six day he walked on his own and they sent him home.

Since that time he has lived on his own off and on. We sensed by the group of people he was hanging with that he was getting involved with drugs. He hasn't been able to keep relationshps for more than a year and a half.

Fast forward to last year. We noticed he was pulling away from family and friends more and more. He was becoming more agitated and his personality was beginning to change.

Now fast forward to this year. Our concerns for his well being were increasing. He was becoming more agitated and could fly off the handle quickly. (Not physically violent) He has been involved in a couple of fender benders within the past couple of months. Then in early July I received a call from the police and asked to come get him. He was also sending me text messages begging me to come get him and save him. When I arrived he was sitting in the dark and was extremely paranoid.

I took him to our home and he was scared that people were surrounding the house, on our roof and people are staring at him. I took him to the ER and he did have high THC levels. He went into counseling and therapy with a psychologist.

What we have learned is that he has been in pain with headaches and body aches for several years. He has been self medicating with marijuana and tried pottpourri for a few months earlier this year.

Since he has been with us for the past six weeks his paranoia has reduced some but his level of agitation has NOT. He is difficult to be around because he feels he is perfect and everyone else is imperfect and he seems to take pleasure in pointing out perceived inperfections and demeaning others. THis is very far from his normal personality. There are also certain subjects you avoid and everyone is walking on egg shells around him.

Now in his most recent counseling session it is been suggested his agitation, mood swings, headaches and other pains may all be related to TBI. That his self medication with marijuana was his way with dealing with it all.

Now within the past couple of days we learned my neice who passed away in July had been diagnosed with BPD and was on Lithium. We were not aware of this and didn't know of any family history of BPD or any other issues.

At this point we are tired and confused. My wife and I plan to spend one night away from home this weekend for our anniversary and to meet with my brother who lost his daughter last month.

Hi,

It is good that he is home with you and getting treatment.
A psychiatrist and a neurologist can help with diagnosis.

(For point of clarification:
BPD usually stands for Borderline Personality Disorder
BP usually stands for Bipolar Disorder)

Sometimes the exact diagnosis about how much is TBI and how much might be bipolar is not hugely important because medications that are used for TBI are also used for Bipolar.
For example Anticonvulsants (antiepileptic drugs) are used for both.

Agitation is a horrible thing to have to deal with. Push the doctors to get him the right medication for this.
Does he have agitated depression? Here is a description:
http://www.helium.com/items/2174987-...ted-depression
Has any one discussed that he might have PTSD (Posttraumatic stress disorder)? They can test for that.


I am sorry that your family is going through this.

Mari

Thank you. That was an eye opener. Sorry for the confusion on BPD vs BP

From the list they provided in the article (- Fast speech, non-stop talking
- Fixation on self-harm or suicide- Substance misuse- Fidgeting, playing with hair or skin- Complaining constantly- Being irritable or aggressive)

He does show several of those characteristics. Substance misuse, complaining constantly, being irritable. He is NOT suicidal or physically aggressive.

But as an example. He helped install a part on our car last night. As he was working on it I complimented him about how well he was doing with the car and how quickly he was getting the job done. He just grumbled and told me I was in the way and to leave him alone.

About 20 minutes later he was sitting on the couch and asked loudly...'So, is anyone going to THANK ME for fixing the car?"

I pointed out that I had complimented him and tried to thank him while he was working on the car. He then went on and on about nobody ever appreciating what he does and how he is smarter and better than any of us. That lasted for about 30 minutes non-stop.

It's very tiring.

Ksman

Sending you some hugs and hoping you get some answers.

Please keep us updated. You might find that asking questions on
the adult bipolar forum would give you more answers too.

Many of us with children have asked on there. Or even some without
children with BP do.

Donna

We have some of these MI issues in our family, and our son is no exception. It's extremely challenging I know. Sometimes, answers are not easy and readily available. Just wishing you all the best and glad you are reaching out. Take care!

Hi,

I missed that the paranoia was still present although to a lesser degree than it was.
That could be Bipolar or PTSD or both.

http://psychcentral.com/disorders/sx32.htm
If he ever gets physically aggressive even one time call the police (911) and have him taken to the hospital to be evaluated by a psychiatrist.


I don't know what that is. He does seem to be both annoyed and annoying.
And tiring as you say.

It does seem that when you find a good MD who can help him with the TBI, you can start to see other ways to help him.

Mari

We survived our first weekend away from our son. We left late Friday afternoon and returned Saturday night.

He was fine with us leaving. That evening we were in Kansas City and noticed on the news that Bruce Jenner was at Kansas Speedway. So I jokingly sent him a text message saying Bruce was at the speedway and we were hanging out with Kim K. Then he started asking a bunch of questions about her. I finally realized he thought I was serious. SO I told him that I was just joking. He got really mad and shot me about 6 texts complaining that I had "lied" to him and how unfit I was as a father since I had "lied" to him.

I changed the subject and a few minutes later he was calm and texting about other things. I asked him if he had invited any friends over and he replied that he would never do that while we are gone out of "respect" for us and our home. (hmmmmm?)

The next day we were celebrating our anniversary with family and friends. And we were getting further and further behind schedule. He started texting and asking why we weren't home and when he should expect us. As we got more and more behind schedule he got more and more irritated and starting going off about us lieing to him about our schedule and where we were and what we were doing. That went on for about 30 minutes. Again, we gave him updates on our travels and when he could expect us and he switched again to being very calm and thanked us for letting him know where we were.

On Sunday we witnessed a bad accident on the highway and he was the first to say, pull over and pray for the people in the wreck.

In one sense he has been very controlling, wanting to know where we are and what we are doing. (Especially me and not my wife). Other times he is calm and respectful which is more in line with the way he was raised.

I'm glad you had a good time away and that he did what sounds like
pretty good too.

I think it sounds like he needs a schedule and to know what is going
on all the time.

I hope you can find a happy medium. He needs this as much as you and
your wife.

Donna

Just a quick update. He did get to see an MD which was required in order to get a referral to see a TBI specialist.

He did pretty good but spent a lot of time arguing with the doctor about the benefits of his self medicating and not wanting any man mde medications.

The doctor handled it well. I wasn't there but my wife said the doctor was able to see some examples of his shifts back and forth into becoming irritated over minor things and then quickly going back to being happen and then suddenly shifting again over minor things that agitated him.


His paranoia has continued to decrease but he seems to do his very best to make sure my wife and I are not alone together. He does not want us talking with each other. He demands a lot of my time, comes to my place of work, wants me to spend hours with him alone. He gets very irritated if my wife and I tell him we want to have a "date night" without him. We even went bowling with a group of her co-workers last night and he insisted on going with us saying we don't spend enough "family" time together.

This fits well with the behaviors his girlfriends have described over the past year and half. He has become controlling, wants to be with them at all times, does not want them to go anywhere without him and yet he feels people are always cheating, sneaking around and lieing to him (yes that is paranoia)

Even when I was visiting with my wife on the phone and he was next to me. I told him I could hear her cooking something and it was sizzling like we might be having friend chicken. Then we got home and found out she was cookign something else. He got very upset with me and said I had lied to him about the chicken and he was really upset.

THis behavior is so confusing and not part of his normal personality at all.

Another update. Today my son went to see his psychiatrist. She put him on Quetiaprine. This is the 3rd medication. He refused to take the first two. Latuda and something else I can't remember.

He usually tries the meds for a day or two and then says they don't do any good and quits.

He feels his problems are more related to his TBI from 2007. He is going to see a TBI specialist in Kansas City next month.

He also seems to make up plenaty of excuses for self medicating and how much better and more natural that would be. My wife and I aren't buying that and his doctors aren't either. In fact the MD that met with him last week told him that many of his physical and mental symptoms may be directly related to his self medication.

I hope something starts working soon. There times I have to ask myself is this is a medical issue or is he just being a jerk?