steffi, middle of the night...check out the time stamp on this post EST in the USA...2:20 a.m.

A knock on the door at any hour is always welcome

Paula, I am not sure what "finally revealing who you are" means. I think I am just fisty tonight. Learned long ago not to take anything in life for granted. Tomorrow may not come...things change in an instant...discovered that 12 years ago when that kid ran the stop sign. Of course, my most recent change was the seizure and how that single event has changed my life and provided me with a totally new perspective on a component of life that I believe I always took for granted.

Yesterday...yikes, at this hour yesterday is Thurs...I had to get to my daughter's by 7a.m. These days that is not a simple task for me since I can't drive my car. I have to call the county transit authority BEFORE noon the day before (I do all ride requests for the following week on Fridays BEFORE noon or I won't have a ride on Monday, if I need one that day) to reserve a ride. Since I am under age 60...heck for 15 more months...I had to qualify for the transportation as a "person with disability." Well, to go back to getting to my daughter's by 7 a.m...I have to call the transit authority between 5pm and 6pm the day prior to find out what my "pick up" time will be the next day. So, on Weds I called and the reply was "between 5:15 and 5:30 a.m......what else could I say but "okay, thanks" Then I have to search my wallet to make sure I had $1.75 (the cost of a trip outside the the five mile radius of the Gettysburg "square," which is actually a circle. Well, I didn't have $1.75. I had $1.50, shy one quarter, but I did have two $5's. Believe me it is no laughing matter when you don't have the proper fare, which I didn't, so I had to give the driver one of my $5's, also not a laughing matter to me. I got to my daughters at 6:15 a.m., after we dropped off the dialysis patients. She came downstairs all bleery eyeed and asked, "Why are you here so early?" Already set up my four rides for next week...three days to my daughters and one to my psychologist.

Believe me, this not-driving "thing" is NOT fun at all. Had a test at the hospital this morning, had to wait for the driver to come back and pick me up...could be worse, I could have had to walk there, which I had to do this past Monday for another test at the hospital. (Stephi, glad you don't have to walk anywhere...sounds like you live far outside of a town )

Before anyone asks, once I reach the age of 60, then the Office of Aging picks up the cost of the fare and pays it for you. Heck, by then I had better be driving again. Hopefully, by Sept 11th, if not the 17th! Oh yes, and the fare to go to any place withing five miles of the "square" is $1.20. Unless it is a medical appointment, then there is no cost.

So, what did I take for granted:

1. Jumping into my car ANYTIME I want to go anywhere I want.
2. That being able to go to the store for something as simple as a gallon of milk was easy for the disabled and elderly who use the transit system. Well, it is not easy. We were 15 minutes late picking up an elderly person on Thursday, and that only gave her 15 minutes to grocery shop. She had only asked for a 30 minute period to shop.

Never take anything in your life for granted, it may be taken away from you without much notice!

Okay, now you have to endure my collection of quotes
I will leave everyone be for the rest of the night, going to bed!
I am done rambling AGAIN!

I have not been able to drive for years. It is the hardest thing I had to give up. We have a service here where I live called Darts. It is run totally by volunteers. You have to get on a waiting list to arrange a scheduled ride so I had to give up my health club because my husband has a busy life (like I used to have) and it limits my ability to socialize. Having to arrange a ride 4 days in advance may be a pain but I am thankful for the willingness of the elderly who generally spend their golden years shutteling me to my doctor appointments.

After a while, I have, out of despiration, learned to overcome my shyness of people and be more sensitive to watch for others with special needs and spend time talking to them. Yesterday my husband had a physical scheduled at our clinic. While we parked, I saw a gentleman about my age sitting in a wheel chair sitting outside with his aide parked about 20 feet on a bench reading a newspaper. The man's head kept bobbing around, as the aide had parked him facing the opposite way so he could not see him. I went into the clinic with my husband while he checked in, then told him I would be right back. I went back out side and introduced my self to the man and he told me alot about himself.

He had MS but had his own company that made transisters to alert farmers when the sows on their farms were about to give birth. We enjoyed talking for awhile. He was a very pleasant man named Doug and we talked until his ride arrived. When he asked about his aide I let him know where he was and that he was keeping a close eye on him. I said good bye and went back to the building feeling like I connected with someone, even though I probably will never hear from him again.

Love,
Vicky

It helps to look outside at others and not be introverted and constantly looking at how the world treats you. If you are not looking for opportunities to reach out to others, and are willing to risk the occasional rejection without assuming the person who has rejected you has had a bad day; not because you have bad breath, are fat, unattractive or whatever, you will add so much more happiness to your life.

Rick,
You can count on me to be caringly blunt, and I do hope the caring shows.

I would suggest to anyone that on the internet they recognize that the range of opinion is probably far greater than they have ever encountered before.

On some sites, such as some political ones, there is a spirit of combat that resembles anything from bashing one another over the head to the most delicate fencing. The cleverest one wins. Here, and on any support site, I like to see the opposite attitude: if someone takes offense, they begin with "I must have misunderstood you," and the answer is, "so sorry, those are my views but I don't mean they have to be yours." And so forth. The abbreviation IMHO (In My Humble Opinion) goes a long way.

Blanket statements, especially those suggesting extreme measures, are sure to squash someone's toes. Presumably we are not here to upset one another, even in a spirit of "fun," so, even if an idea is sure to save the planet, I've observed that giving people some time to get used to it by tempering it with IMHO or IMNSHO (...Not So...) helps keep the insult level down.

Someone said "I-statements." Yes, definitely. If we would all re-read what we've written and change anything that purports to tell someone else how they feel or what they are, peace would come a lot sooner to the world.

It really helps to meet some of the other forum members in person, because it makes it a lot easier to relate to them as real people. Best not to say anything you wouldn't be able to say to the person in person.

Years ago, on some of this forum's forerunners, if someone had a big difference of opinion with me, I'd ask them to email me off-forum, for the sake of the community, and we'd work it out in one-on-one. I was too naive to stay guarded, so while I made great friends that way, I also received a "blackmail" threat when someone said they'd like to reveal what I said on the open forum. People do get very upset about ideas!

One time I hurt someone's feelings so badly that it took them years to forgive me, so I'm not saying any of this from a superior position. These are not rules, just things I've observed and found IMHO useful.

I hope this helps, at least to spur someone's thinking.

Jaye

I agree with what you posted, especially about what you said about the differnce between meeting online and then meeting in person

I avoid to the best of my ability confrontations with people on the forum..Ive only gotten in a few scraps, and never came away feeling good about it..I have always come here for inspiration, friendship, advise, and to hopefully help someone else if I can..One of the other reasons why I dont like to argue, is because Im a sore looser.. ..Enough said about that..I have a few political forums that I go to, to let the birds out, and as Jaye mentioned, they can be very combative places, and more times than not, a knock down drag out bashfest..The subject matter gets lost in the chase, and it becomes a sport to see who can insult who the best, without getting banned in the process..The differnce between the poliitical forums, and this forum..for me is..I have met some of the people here, and hope to meet more of you in time..On the politcal forums, there are very, very few people who I would look foward to meeting

Moderators,

To be completely honest, I have to say that closing the thread strikes me as a pretty strong action. Or perhaps it should be called a reaction.

But you have all been kind, and helpful and I like you and your visits here. I'm not challenging you - I like it here .
Flashes of BT1 on that one tho.

I have come to look at it this way after giving it a day of thought. We weren't given the chance to learn how to talk about the hard stuff or try to do it in a reasonable way.

You do not have to explain anything again. It'll be forgotten real soon anyway.

This is just a comment; not a condemnation!
paula

I agree with what y'all are saying.

It's not like not being able to do something in one place means it can't be done all...good point!

Can't do the political stuff in some, but can in others when a need is felt.

KD

Thank you, paula

KD