Successful Caregiving Means That A Caregiver Should Not Neglect Own Health Needs As Well, Expert Says

Monday, January 21, 2008 (Last modified: 2008-01-21 14:19:50)

Source: The Greeneville Sun
http://greenevillesun.com/site/Story/292209
By LISA WARREN

Staff Writer

Caring for a loved one through a chronic or terminal illness can be a rewarding yet challenging experience.

Being a caregiver can be time-consuming, stressful, and often exhausting -- affecting one's physical, mental and spiritual well-being.

To be a successful caregiver, you must learn to take care of yourself, too, says Rebecca McCurry, a registered nurse with Laughlin Home Health.

McCurry was the guest speaker at this month's Passport 55 series lecture, sponsored at Roby Fitzgerald Adult Center by Laughlin Memorial Hospital.

"If you want to provide good care, you've got to take care of yourself," McCurry said. "You should not neglect your physical or mental needs."

One of the first steps that a caregiver should take is learning about their loved one's illness or condition and how to provide appropriate care. This includes learning about the care receiver's medications and how to give them. It is also important to know how to properly move and lift a person who is physically limited -- without hurting yourself or the patient.

As a home health nurse, McCurry said she works closely not only with the patients but their family caregivers, as well.

"Family and friends who are caregivers are considered the backbone of long-term care," McCurry said. "They are the ones who are there all the time."

These individuals provide help with daily living activities, such as dressing and bathing; fixing meals; cleaning; and doing laundry. What's more they also provide emotional support, she said.

McCurry acknowledged that being a caregiver to an ailing loved one can be very rewarding -- yet at times stressful. It can also become the center of a caregiver's life.

The No. 1 thing that caregivers should do, McCurry said, is to look after their own personal health.

"Proving care is stressful, and stress can build up and cause a lot of other health problems," McCurry said. "It makes your blood pressure go up, which can lead to cardiac and other problems."

"You need to take breaks and do things for yourself apart from your loved one," she said.

"Don't be afraid to ask others for help," she continued. "If you don't ask for help, people won't know what you need.

"You may feel like you're burdening others by asking. But, really, most people are more than willing to help. They are just waiting on you to tell them what to do," she said.

Being a primary caregiver can often bring about a variety of emotions, from pleasurable and rewarding feelings to ones of anger, guilt and resentment, she said.

"You can't change a person's illness, but you can change how you respond to it," McCurry said. "Accept the things you can change and let go of the things that you can't."

McCurry said it is important to not suppress one's negative feelings, but rather find ways to release them in a positive way. Talk with someone. Attend a support group meeting. Write your thoughts down in a journal. These are all ways to put one's feelings into perspective and not allow them to build up and cause pent up stress.

"Support groups are a wonderful thing," she said.

"There are other people there who are going through the same thing that you are. They might be able to give you an idea of things that they have done to help them in their lives. And you can help others in the same way," she added.

McCurry suggested using humor and laughter as an outlet for relieving stress and anxiety.

"Memorize some jokes and use them to help alleviate a stressful situation," she said.

"Caregivers are going to have highs and lows all the time. When you are at your low points, remember that things will improve and get better. Enjoy the moments of pleasure," she said. "You'll have ups and downs. Even in those times when you're having a bad day, try and find something that you can laugh about."

McCurry also said that many caregivers find that turning to prayer and support from their church family also provides a source of comfort and encouragement.

"If you ever feel that you are at the end of your rope, though, and you need help, remember there are many people out there who can help," she added.

Guidance and information on available resources can be found at the social services departments at the local hospitals, she said.

Other resources can be accessed by calling the First Tennessee Area Agency on Aging and Disability at 928-3258 or the Aging/Disability Resource Connection at 639-7133.