I ran away from home . literally. 50 years old.. pd 24 years.. and i ran away from home. i didnt allow myself enough time to be frightened of doing it. i picked up the phone.. and the next week i was on the plane. My first stop was alabama, then on to sc, nc, atlanta, finally tenn. now i am back home. i met the most fantastic people on earth. people with pd, carepartners, family members, neighbors, locals, strangers that became friends and got to know a little bit about pd in the process. I had a wonderful, healing journey and I can attribute that to the kindness, generousity and support given through these fantastic people. The best kind of support as each act, smile, tear, word and hug were completely genuine. This is where strength comes from. Total trust enabled by true support.I will never be able to express the gratitude in full to these wonderful people who unfolded their arms to a woman they scarcely knew but through words posted on the internet.

i have discovered something I needed very badly. I discovered me again. The me that got lost alongside of the road so long ago has come back and fully embraced every part of my existence so I can now stand tall again with authority over each statement and decision I make. My laughter again is full and from the gut with genuine freedom. i have fallen in love with life again. I now know myself again because I now have the freedom to do so. i have found my aggressive personality and my soft side and worked them into a unity of form, and I have learned this form is human. Not a tent with a mind trapped inside of it crying to get out.

I did this because i was able to breathe the clean air my mind needed to clear away the cobwebs that were strangling my perceptions of my own humanness. once i escaped from behind the bars which had kept me hostage in a room falsely labeled "security”, I could unfold my wings and discover life with the strength from God. He is the only security I need and I am no longer afraid of what is around the next bend.

There is no turning back. I have not turned the page to begin another chapter in life. I have closed the old book and have begun to write a new one. My capabilities are becoming secure within my mind and I am going to utilize them to the utmost. God is showing me that I can do a lot more than I thought I could do as He walks beside me and heals my soul. I have hired an attorney, and my marriage will soon be over. There is no remorse as there is no room nor need for it. The days gone by are now in the past and what lay ahead is not attatched to them or their memories. It is simply time to live happily and be at peace with the true security given to me from God.

Thank you to all of you who have had me in prayer. thank you for your kindness, your support, your advice, your patience, and most importantly.. thank you for accepting me as who i am.

I am going to go find life now.

It is always an inspiration to hear storys of hope from people who have had pd for a long time like yourself Laura..I can remember the virtual count down to the nursing home going on in my mind, untill I met John Ball the marathon runner from Cailfornia at the WPC who had, had pd for 23 years at the time I met him a few years ago, and he's still running marthons, and still finishing

In a strange way, pd has brought alot of peace and acceptence into my life..It has brought some pain as well, and alot of changes..It has taught me the true meaning of gratitude, and has shown me the power of God's grace, and how it manifests itself under all conditions

The unconditional love of the PWP I have met has truly been a gift..From words on the internet, to meeting the folks behind the words has been an exciting adventure..I wish we were all neighbors

God is Love...

Right on Harley!!!!

Two years ago I too found me again, ending a 30 year marriage. I wont go into detail but just say I rediscovered who I am and with Jesus at my side I can accept that and am ready for the challeges of each new day.

I can understand and can relate to everything you said, Have a great day! Life is good!

Laura,

I'm glad you're at peace with yourself. This is the biggest part of the strength that we need to continue on. After fighting and denial, I too have finally given in and accepted who I am, what I've got, and there's nothing much I can do about it other than keep doing what I'm doing now. So this year, I stepped away too. I spent some money and travelled nearly 10,000 miles viewing the power that mother nature and God has.

We [general as in humans] are the powerless ones. We are the ones that think we can conquer all. However, watch a supercell form on the plains, and you'll then realize that we are at the mercy of what's given to us and there's not much we can do about it.

So having said this, I now think differently. I still try my best at what I can do even if it takes me longer to get there. Who cares. If it bothers someone, I tell them to find someone else to do it. I don't care anymore. If something or someone is bothering me, no longer keep my mouth shut and be polite. I speak my mind and loudly. Watch out world here I come!

John