Steffi:

I'm glad I was able to help.

I've tried to be very public with my PD - mostly because when it hit there was no way to hide it, unless I stayed home for a month or so. It also helps when at the start of a meeting, if I feel like I'm going to be shaking, I just tell the others up front, so they don't get distracted by seeing me shaking and spend half of their attention wondering. I'm doing okay, though; meds are still working fine, though I keep tweaking them up just a little bit every couple of months. Puzzles me why the PD hit so fast: long slow slope over a decade, then a sudden drop over a weekend, then has stayed on a long slope ever since.

But like you, I've finished with my grieving over the fact that all of my plans have gone awry, and now can pretty much skip the pity parties. For the last year, I've felt more like this is a new adventure - something new to anticipate all of the time. Of course, the new is always down, but hey! at least it is new.

There isn't much of a light at the end of the tunnel when it comes to PD, but there definitely was one for depression - when it suddenly lifted three years ago, it was a new awakening. It didn't lift as fast as it came, but it did go away. Funny thing is, I didn't lose my faith in God during those ten years, just kind of wondered where He was and why didn't He make things better?

ECD-
I've spent a total of perhaps 3 or 4 months in England & Scotland over a number of visits (since 1975), and learned a little that way. However, I think I've learned most of my British language and culture from Douglas Adams! (not directly of course, but extropolating from his books). The funniest, goofiest writer I've ever read.

We do have Cornish pasties over here, though, or at least up in this northwest corner of the US - my wife's mother taught her to make them - delicious. And there are a few taverns and small restaurants where they can be had. All down in Seattle, unfortunately; an 85 mile drive. Probably the hardest thing that I found to describe to my friends over here was Weetabix - we just don't have anything like it over here.

The following has religious overtones. It is the story of my life until now. Although it is related to Parkinson's disease, that relationship is not readily apparent.
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__I looked up from my sleep_____________

...and I looked up from my sleep and saw Him standing beside me. in His hands He held a case for storing my possessions. it was empty until He began to place within it treasures. He was tall, easily over seven feet, and He was transparent. i seemed to know Him but not as well as He knew me.
i was but a child, barely 8 years old. i felt comfortable calling this visitor "Daddy," so i did so. it was then that He called me by my name, and my journey began. as my name fell from His lips, my heart heard His voice. although i was afraid, i knew that He would protect me. i would be eternally blessed from that day forward.
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I looked up from My place of comfort and saw Him standing beside Me. His stature was not as tall as I had remembered. He spoke softly, barely getting My attention. He wanted Me to leave My comfortable place and pray for one walking in front of Me who had the palsy. His voice was not as clear as when He called Me by My name, and I was uncertain of His ability. I remained in My comfortable place and did not pray. I have wept often because of My decision.
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I looked up from My position and I saw Him sitting on His throne. His invitation to Me was to enter into the HOLY OF HOLIES where He said that He would teach me to war. knowing full well that I should go, I stayed instead and stood firmly in My postion where the enemy struck Me down and now torments Me. I now weep because of My decision.
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In my dream, I saw myself hanging from the pinnacle of hopelessness and despair. He was not there. I cried out and hoped that He would hear and come to rescue me. He sent His servants instead. I was taken to a place of rest to observe life from a different perspective. Here I am being nurtured and restored. Here I wait with anticipation to hear Him once more direct my path. Then will I say yes and discover newness of life.
From my place of rest I have observed the living who are dying in their need. slowly fading, slowly falling, slowly losing ground. many weep and are discouraged. they hold on with weak hands and stand with feeble knees. I hear the sound of His foot steps in the distance. As they draw nearer I feel my faith growing strong. I feel the bandages being removed from my once near-fatal wounds. strength returns to me.
I will run and not become weary. I will walk, and I will not faint. ...and then I will fly like an eagle and rejoice in my decision. I am blessed.


michael