"Well done" isn't anywhere near enough of a pat on the back.
Here's a thought though. I am only on day 31, and I am beginning to wonder wether or not it's a good idea, (for me), to be counting up? Sometimes I wonder wether or not my subconcious is using it as a countdown to the next drink?

Coopster, I think that "counting" works differently for different people.

I counted for the first year or so but now I just reflect on how much healthier I feel as well as looking at my bank balance and smiling .

I sometimes have an echo in here with kiwi

Thanks Coopster. Yes, it's a personal thing, probably 50/50 even. For me, and I think for Icehouse too, it's a way to be accountable. I loved seeing the numbers tick, like a child looking in a gas station meter (but in reverse, I guess...) and report on them here.

But now it may well be I'm going to concentrate less on it, "move on" as it were. Do something with my new found freedom. Maybe just mention it yearly.

To come back to you, if it makes you feel in any way uncomfortable, don't count. Many don't, and still stay sober. There are no wrong or right ways, except for drinking or not. How you get there, what works best for you, you have to find out. Counting is probably not for you, so don't.

Well, I use a counter on my phone for two reasons.

1) To be accountable to this group and to my Wed night recovery group.

2) I really don't have another reason.

I used to watch it like a hawk for the first year or two, now I only check it once a month (on the 2nd). I actually have no idea what the actual number is unless I look....that is a good thing.

When somebody asks me about my sobriety I usually just say, "I have been sober for years"

That makes me feel good.

It's funny, although I'm not in AA, and have only quickly read the Big Book, I find myself somehow doing amends, and contacting people again I should have contacted long ago.

You know how families can be complicated. Well, I haven't spoken to my brother for at least 20 years, but he has a daughter who's mum - my brother's first wife - passed away earlier this year. So I contacted my niece with my condolences, we talked a little more, and will see each other somewhere in the new year to have a good long talk. I have only ever seen her as a 6 month old baby, she now is a mom herself, so that's also a bit of a shock about time flying and all that.

Anyway, I think there is value in trying to correct some wrongs from the past, even if they are not directly related to your addiction.

I am not an attendee of any AA meetings either, not since my first stint at rehab. BUT, I am an advocate of amends.

I finalized my last one in October and it was like "breaking the chains". I highly recommend this for anyone in recovery from an abusive addiction.

I have used the idea of amends a lot.

For me it is based on the Maori word for enemy which is hoariri.

The literal translation of hoariri is "angry friend" - I don't think that I have any enemies .

Had to think of you today. Had lunch with an old friend. He used to see me every week - even during my really heavy drinking periods - both for work and private (we played music together). He was one of the ones that thought "it wasn't so bad though was it?" He still did today BTW. But more important, I somehow said "2011 days now", and he said "they all do that, don't they, the counting?" So I had to explain to him that no, some don't.

Find your own best rituals, it's a very personal thing. I remember this being discussed in rehab a lot too. There it was about "but we always talk about booze here, so of course we think about wanting to drink all the time". It's similar, in that you somehow learn to separate the subject or the "number" from the actual drinking.

It may well be that, after a while, you feel secure enough to start counting. Or, again, not. Doesn't matter Never feel bad about how you do things, as long as they help you.

Also interesting: he is one of the people that think/said "But if you drank today, it wouldn't be so bad anymore, would it? I mean, after 5 years plus!" He was serious, and concerned, it wasn't to yank my chain. So I had to explain that it is not how it works, on the contrary. He learned a new word today (kindling...)

There are still many misconceptions about alcoholism, even with very smart people.

Just checking in. Unfortunately I am missing out on much of the holiday festivities as they involve walking and standing and I can't put myself in that situation and so have had to make up random excuses to hide behind. I must keep my expectations modest and realistic. I manage well in my little dwelling but when I venture out I struggle. Today I am going to do a bit of shopping but long gone are the days where I can spend hours at the stores just to knock things out. If I can manage an hour I will consider that a good day.
There is much drama around me with neighbors and friends. It is just especially sad this time of year when so many are sustaining such terrible losses and struggling with major illnesses. As discouraged and depressed as I am over my neuropathy issues, I consider myself lucky as I look around me and the struggles of others. I brought this on myself while they are innocent victims. My heart hurts for them.

I think you are doing a good job - or getting better at - managing expectations. PN will hinder us - each and every person on this thread I think - but will not prevent us from living a full life. And indeed, many people are so much worse off.

Also: to be clear, improvement is still possible. I'm trying to be as honest as I can here, but things are always "in a context". I went from a level 7 to 8/10 pain situation to a usual 2 (with proper medication) to 4 (on a bad day). That is huge. But it's still chronic pain, and affects me, and I need to deal with that, and I have bad days with "why me?" too. But less and less so. Because I adapted my expectations to match reality.

Sure, no all day shopping for you, I get that. But shopping for a small hour is about a small hour more than I could manage after 8 months sober. It took me 2 years before I could go to a live pop-concert, standing for 1.5 hours, but sitting down occasionally for some relief. Still, I was up for about an hour though, at least. Felt like I finished a marathon and won the lottery at the same time.

So... enjoy that one hour or even 30 minutes you can manage. Festivities are a blessing to some, but a total drag on many many people. So yeah, try to have some fun nonetheless, and good on you for being able to think about those who are less fortunate still.