Thank you very much for your help, Atty.

My goodness, I really have no clue where I'd be without you guys to help. Mom will start taking the magnesium first thing tomorrow!

I take 250mg each day, without much an appreciable bowel effect--but it does help a lot with cramping and tingling, as I notice very quickly if I run out of them.

Another update for today, I finally gave mom her first pill of magnesium. I was really worried to give her any, because we didn't know if she was okay to take magnesium or not. But we started today.

Then an hour or so later her leg seemed to swell up, and I was worried I messed up or something. And then she wanted to eat a frozen pizza, and thought by eating a banana she could offset any problems that arose from it. I thought "maybe it's okay" before when she mentioned it, but when her leg started swelling I said absolutely not. So we had an argument about that, but she had a salad instead eventually. We didn't throw out the pizza, but I really don't think she should have it at all anyway, even though it's turned out she's not diabetic or even prediabetic, her doctor said I think.

And then I also remembered she probably shouldn't even eat too much of foods like bananas, because her lisinopril already causes high potassium. And we don't need more issues on top of everything else.

Today has been incredibly stressful, and both me and mom almost broke down completely, for reasons more than just above. But we're persevering. Or trying to, at least. We're running into financial problems, and trying to fix it by getting mom to go back to work, at least part-time, to make more money. 60% of her pay just isn't gonna cut it for even rent alone. I'm sure she can do it. Even if her memory problems are still here, they're probably not bad enough to make work anything more than a little more difficult than usual. Plus, it'd be good for her. To be able to take her mind off of things, talk to her old coworkers and just...get some semblance of her old life back, y'know? For the entire 2 months we've been going through this, it's just been me, and my mom. Sometimes a relative will stop by, and for almost 2 weeks my aunt came to help us. But other than that, it's just been us. Work will be good for her, I think. I've also heard an active mind can help recovery, too. Just like an active body can help speed up the recovery process.

On that topic, it really has come to my attention how much we've slacked on that front. Mom walked today, but that was it. And right after I promised myself I would get up in the mornings to help. But all morning has been stressful for mom. Shoot, all day really. Way into the night, she's been stressed or in tears. I wanted to wait a little before we exercised for her to be okay, but that time never came. We can't slack on exercise though, especially not now. We haven't even gone up the stairs since PT last came, which I think was Friday. We need to make going up and down stairs a normal thing for mom. That's really good exercise for her.

Doesn't help that she thinks she should just not exercise after PT is done. She made it seem like she didn't even need to exercise, that it wasn't necessary, after PT. But then tonight she used the walker for 6 mins of her 8-minute walk. I wish she would just see that it helps and go through with it sometimes. So much resistance when we both want the same thing for her.

If life wants us to fight for our lives back, then I guess that's what we gotta do. So fight we shall. We're striving for only good things from here on out!

I went browsing some more on this sight, and again comes Icehouse to the rescue with his personal experiences.

I saw he apparently had liver cirrhosis, and I'm starting to think maybe that's what my mom has. It'd explain the swelling, at least. But to hear that even cirrhosis can be managed, it fills me with that same hope for the future that I've been dreading for days now.

Either way, tomorrow morning (or technically today, since it's 3:30 AM almost ) marks a brand new day. Mom is going to try going back to work. Not on that day, but she's going to discuss her hours with her boss either that day or the next. Both her and I are a little worried her memory problems will make work difficult, but I'm at least a little confident that won't be permanent, at least as it is right now. I feel like it'll be some time before she's back to herself, but I also feel like the activities will help her a lot in that regard. I'm pretty certain I mentioned it in my previous post mere hours ago, but I have heard that an active mind can help with the recovery process. And as an...accountant? I don't know what kinda job mom has specifically, but she works with numbers a lot. Whatever job she has, I'm sure it'll help her get her mind back to being active again. And she'll be with her people. She'll have something to do other than just sitting at home and either being asleep or feeling miserable, y'know?

On the topic of her memory problems, I wonder if her doctor should have just gotten her a B complex supplement instead of just B1. She's been getting B1 and B12 (though I think only 100mg of B1, which I thiiiink isn't a lot?), but not B6 or any other B vitamin. But maybe she needs the other ones too, y'know? Either way, she has shown improvement. She's still forgetful, but now it's just down to reminding her of things and then she immediately remembers everything that comes with that little reminder, or her forgetting what day it is, which I'm mostly chalking up to her not really having anything to do most of the day. I know I forget what day it is, though not as frequently as mom does sometimes, and I kind of don't do anything outside of taking care of her right now. But even before that, I didn't really do much. I was a NEET before this-- technically still am, just my 'job' now is being an unpaid caretaker for my mom.

We're going to start walking more and exercising more, and I mean it this time. I know she doesn't want to, but it can only do good for her. Keeping both her mind and body active will do wonders. We're going to have some greens with some...turkey, I think it is? IDK what the meat is, but it's reddish on the inside and is like a big ol' drumstick. Anyways, we're having that for dinner later today, since it's technically morning right now. It's good for her supposedly, outside of the sodium from the meat. But I think if we just keep active, eat healthy and stay away from alcohol (almost 3 months sober so far for mum, she hasn't even thought about alcohol once since this whole thing started), in time all things will resolve themselves as I've seen Icehouse say in a few of his posts...wish us luck. I'll keep you guys updated as things happen, maybe if things go swell I'll be able to tell you when I get my first job after mom's recovered enough!

(5 AM edit) I am also considering getting mum a Doctor's Best Benfotiamine instead of using the doctor-prescribed thaimine my mom's been on for the past near 2 months now. I also don't even think my mom takes a lot of thiamine right now-- just 1 tablet a day, I think it's 50 or 100mg, even though she was an alcoholic of around 15 years. From what I've seen, that doesn't appear to be enough, but I also am worried about giving her too much. Any suggestions?

How bizarre is it that the BEST DAY so far was preceded by one of the worst?

Today was great. Mom was up ALL day, she didn't take any naps like she usually did, she was up and moving, she made dinner, but most importantly she was HAPPY.

She graduated PT. She was a little sad to see them go for the last time. Honestly thought about keeping in touch-- she's really enjoyed the company of both of her physical therapists when they came by. But when they came today, she walked up the stairs and went outside to the dumpster to handle some trash (which I usually do, so I'm definitely happy/grateful about it), then came back. And now we're planning to go outside to walk on a normal basis, at least 2 times a day after the stairs, starting tomorrow even. Or well, it would start tomorrow, but the weather says it's supposed to rain for the next few days. We'll settle for the stairs and walk in the living room with the patio shades open until then, at least.

Her doctor got her antidepressants, which is probably why she was in such a great mood today, and honestly? I'm so glad her doctor saw mom needed them. We got so much of our stuff done today. She's really looking forward to just going straight back to work full-time, even. And so am I, it'll be good for her. I don't think it'll be longer before I can trust her to take care of herself again so I can find my own job.

Her leg was much less swollen for most of the morning, but then it started going back up some again tonight. I forgot we had compression socks for her to wear-- probably for this exact reason. So we're going to start having her wear that, probably for maybe an hour at 2-3 times a day or less, and increase it if we need to while she exercises to see if it starts going down. I'm going to believe stalwartly that even the leg swelling will resolve itself as long as mom takes good care of her body through diet and exercise. This doesn't mean I'm going to ignore any new issues as they come up-- far be it from me to do something like that. If something happens, I'll do everything in my power to fix it, if I can't it's up to the doctors. I'm just going to try and stress less about the currently existing issues. Doesn't do anyone any favors. Unless I wanted to start growing gray hair before my 30's. Then I'd be doing myself a big favor.

I definitely feel like I haven't done a stellar job caring for mom, but at the end of the day I'm just happy she finally feels good. Like truly good. It makes the progress we've made feel so much better, so much more tangible. I'll get back to you guys as soon as mom finishes talking with her boss to see how her work hours will pan out!

Hey SoulfulYin,

Great to read this good news. She has made good progress. Well done to her and well done to you. Incidentally I would get Benfotiamine, plus a good multi B Vitamin, but you don't need to get a well known brand.

Best wishes,
Atty

Another quick update today: me and mom walked outside for the first time. it was a very short one, we went up the stairs and just out to the parking lot. she wanted to walk halfway, I said okay, then she met me at the recycling bins nearly the entire parking lot's length away. I was so proud of her. The littlest things really do keep me going. I say littlest, but this feels so big. We're excited about walking around the block eventually, too.

She's decided she'll call her boss tomorrow instead to discuss her hours, but she is still thinking about full-time. She's even deciding that maybe she should go into work maybe once a week. She'd carpool with her brother, and there'd be coworkers (who she's really good friends with) that'd keep an eye out for her too. I know she'd be in good hands. And on the topic of work, we can for sure pay this month's rent. Her job paid her for the 2 weeks they missed back in march today. Talk about a lucky break!

Her memory has been steadily improving, too. Long-term had only suffered slightly-- it was mostly short-term memory that she struggled with. But she's been doing better in both regards since that dreadful day on the 2nd of February, almost significantly so in terms of her short-term memory. I trust she'll do well at work, and I won't have much to worry about when she goes in-- she'll be there for maybe 4 hours max, way before she needs to take her gabapentin again. She's excited to go see friends and family again too-- and so am I. I can relax being home alone for once, knowing my mom is safe, happy and in good hands. She's not going to have a lick of alcohol ever again too, she promised me after I asked her not to have any if she went out with her friends, who do drink sometimes. I trust her.

Our tuxedo cat Puddy passed away 2 days ago, I forgot to mention. I didn't want to at the time, because it was just such a depressing time for me and mom. I feel like it was a little too soon, but she was old, sickly and frail. The part that bites the most is she died under my grandma's watch, and not in the comfort of her home, here. I really don't want to point fingers, because I know my grandma meant well (even if she lied to us about taking her to the vet) and she's just as sad as we are, I just...I wish she would've been a little more responsible.

Me, my mom and 2 of my cousins who loved Puddy dearly are going to make a collage in her memory. Something to pin on the walls of each of our rooms. I placed her empty food bowl in her little cat tower hide-a-hole that she used to sleep in all the time. I have fond memories of the cat. I know most of her years with us were happy and full of love, even if I haven't been the best owner for her, especially this year.

I almost forgot to mention mom's swollen leg, too-- when I looked at it today, it looked and felt SOOOOO much better. It wasn't as thin as it used to be before this started happening, but there's no doubt about it-- that compression sock really, really helped. And she only had it on for an hour before bed last night. We're going to put it on her now for at least an hour a day until her leg returns to normal, and hopefully the walking and healthier diet will help keep it normal afterwards. And when I say better, I do mean it. It was a lot softer when I squeezed, didn't even really look swollen, and it wasn't shining anymore. All of the markers that normally said swollen leg were either gone or going.

Truly, a very very good day today. And we will keep fighting to keep it this way.

Countless thanks for those here who helped me when I needed it...really couldn't have gotten here without you. Without this entire forum. The past near 3 months have been the worst of my life so far. Several times I wondered if we'd even make it out alive. Now I think it's silly to have had such thoughts.

We got our 2nd chance at life. And I'm not going to waste it sitting on the computer all day anymore. I'll be sure to let you guys know when mom starts her first day back at work. And again when I start mine. Shoot, I might even start doing what Icehouse does, and just check in with everyone on a monthly basis. It's the least I could do after all the help I've gotten from here. Much love to you guys. Hope your days are even better than ours.

I'm very sorry to read about your Puddy. That's really sad.

I hope your Mum has been improving and that you're both doing well.

Sorry it took so long for me to reply but I'd been a little sidetracked.

It's been a couple weeks, so I figured I'd drop by and talk about what's been goin on!

Mom's memory is still a bit of an issue, and it shows the most when she's working. She talks about how she sometimes gets sidetracked (with her coworkers or otherwise) then forgets what she was doing originally. Sometimes it causes her to be behind on her work. I'm trying to find ways to help her get around that while her memory recovers. I thought about her setting an alarm and naming it after whatever duty she has for that day and just having it go off ever 30-60 minutes to help her stay on-track. At least until she doesn't need it anymore. Y'know, a little bit of brain training. That, and I'm also thinking of just getting her some B Complex. She's getting B1 and B12, but not B6 or any other type of B vitamin, if there are others. I'm just worried if she takes B1 and B Complex that it'll be an issue.

Her memory issues, on the topic of it, has mostly been reduced to sometimes being unable to remember what she was doing originally if caught on a particular task for a while, even if it's related to her original task. If she were able to set alarms for all the things she needed to do or could focus on one task until it was completely done at a time, her memory problems wouldn't exist, likely. Well, there is also still the occasional forgetting how an event happened, but knowing it did happen. Other than that, though, she's been pretty good.

That, too. She has trouble focusing, more than I think she did before. It probably is due to the new kitten we just got. I didn't agree with getting another kitten, especially so soon after the passing of Puddy, among many other reasons not to get a kitten right now. But the kitten helps keep her happy, so I guess it can't be too bad.

Mom's neuropathy is still present (of course-- didn't expect something that takes years to get under control to leave within 3 months), but she's been recovering very well. The stairs aren't so difficult for her anymore-- we walk outside 3-5 times a week, and very rarely we play Ring Fit Adventure. She sits down for it, and I don't push her to go any further than she feels comfortable to. She's been talking about still getting tingling sensations and sometimes feelings of tightness, but I think that won't be gone or significantly less frequent until the end of the year, at least.

On the topic of her neuropathy, I'm wondering how long it'll be before we can wean her off of gabapentin. Gabapentin seems to bring with it more problems than it's really worth. I see some of its side effects include causing mood swings and even forgetfulness-- which I feel is attributing at least slightly to mom's current memory issues. I'm not doctor, though. I just feel like as soon as we're able to get her off of gabapentin, things will be muuuuch better for us.

Thank you. Puddy's passing hit mom really, really hard. She fell into a really bad slump for a few days, even. And the gabapentin's side effects definitely did not help with her mood.

Other than that, I feel she's been improving gradually as always. Some days it's harder to see it, and others it feels clear as day.

That's quite alright, we all have our own lives to live. I'm glad to hear from you again, though!

Hey SoulfulYin,

Thanks for the update. Thanks for sharing.

In terms of your mum's B vitamin regimen I think Benfotiamine ( B1) with a meal and B12 with water and then a B complex at another time of the day with water would work well.

I chose personally never to take Gabapentin or anything similar so can't comment on its side effects or its efficacy.

Your mum's memory loss is a concern. I wonder if this will help ...

1. Candle
2. Swan
3. Breasts
4. Nose
5. Hook
6.Golf Club
7. Cliff
8. Shapely woman
9. Microphone
10.Laurel and Hardy

You might think I've lost it, and you wouldn't be the first person, but these are memory pegs. We can remember a lot more if use visualization and the idea is that we link anything we need to remember to our memory pegs. So 1 is the shape of a candle, 2 is the shape of a swan. These are easy to recall memory pegs and we can form funny pictures in our mind to recall stuff, even your daily diary. So for example if we want to recall the last 10 Oscar winning films.

1. Nomadland. I can form the image of an old Arabian night in a turban in a desert ( a nomad) sitting on a flying magic carpet, beneath the magic carpet is a giant candle - the memory peg.

2. Parasite. A swan swimming on a lake being attacked by a giant insect

3. Green Book. You can think of your own one for this.

4. The Shape of Water . Think of a nose as a tap or faucet hot water through the right nostril cold through the left.

The point is to be creative and its so easy and fun to do that you can rediscover confidence in your memory pretty much instantly. The key is to think in pictures. This stimulates connectivity between neurons in the brain so is healing too and neuroprotective too.

I use these techniques all the time to recall things and it really helps me. It's worth giving it a try. You can learn and memorize stuff together.

Best wishes,

Atty