On photo bucket and most sites- like on the glitter-graphics
http://www.glitter-graphics.com/graphics/359362

click on the picture or graphic that you like and then scroll down to the codes section - it will say this-
{To post on Glitter-Graphics.com and forums, use this BB code:}
you have to select & copy the "codes" that are for for vBulletin or forums.
then you "paste" it right in the message box.

you can click preview to check & see if it worked.
If not sometimes one portion did not get copied so I usually recopy it again and try a second time.

no need to download anything for these kinds of images/graphics.

'Twas the night before Christmas', when all through the house,
It was me who was stirring with my computer mouse;
The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,
In hopes by tomorrow they’d be warm enough to wear:
The adult children were nestled in their own queen size beds,
While visions of my check book danced in their heads;
And papa in his PJs with three dogs in his lap,
Had just settled down for a long winter's nap,

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
I attempted to move from the bed, to see what was the matter.
Alas, my behind had sunk in the memory foam pad
It took quite rustle, and, I got up pretty mad.

The moon on the crest of the new-fallen snow
Made me dizzy as I scanned for burglars below,
When, what to my half plastered shut eyes should appear,
But a miniature sleigh, and eight tiny reindeer,

With a little old driver, who was hot at the throttle,
I knew in a moment, I took too many pills in the dark, from that bottle.
More slowly than turtles, down the stairs I limped lame,
As he shushed, and whispered, and called them by name:

"Now, DASHER! now, DANCER! now, PRANCER and VIXEN!
On, COMET! on CUPID! on, DONNER and BLITZEN!
We have to be quiet, this woman, don’t wake!
Or I won’t hear the end of it, for goodness sake.

"Her back is ‘a hurting‘, her hands they are numb,
That restless leg syndrome... Who named that? It’s dumb!”
Never the less, we must bring Christmas cheer
She hasn‘t done much shopping, that is evident and clear“.

And then, through that ringing, I heard in my ear
The prancing and pawing of eight tiny reindeer.
As I drew in my hand, and whacked it on the sash,
Down in the family room, I heard a loud crash.

The embers were hot, they had just warmed my feet,
I think I heard a few curse words, that I won’t repeat.
By the time I got down there, everything seemed normal
After all it‘s the Family Room, it isn‘t too formal.

St. Nick, he was toting Lowe Alpine and wearing North Face,
My cheap Wal-Mart PJs were so out of place.
A bundle of tech toys he had dragged down the flue,
A laptop, a cell phone and Blackberry, too.

His eyes -- how they twinkled! his dimples how merry!
The guy never ages and he stays just as hairy!
His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,
Check neuro.wustl, some odd syndrome, you know?

The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth,
He can manage to smoke, not cough, and still breath!
He had a broad face and a little middle aged belly,
But that pipe and that smoke sure made him smelly.

He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf,
I wondered if he had Lipitor or Zetia, at home on the shelf;
A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,
Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread;

He spoke not a word, but he looked at me odd,
And filled all the stockings; then gave me a nod,
Aiming his finger, but missing his nose,
Somehow by magic, up the chimney he rose;

I saw a few signs of some neural dysfunction
But he did his job well, and with plenty of gumption
He works only one day per year, and elves do the rest,
I am not complaining, he does do his best.

I went back to my bed and I tried to relax
Took my Ambien, eye drops, and slurped Miralax
Santa had gone high tech, but he still DID exist
Some things can be real, if we just don’t resist.

We might not feel great, we might feel like crap,
But sing this to music and call it a Rap.
Put yourself on Facebook, but here is the rub,
You must have some type of PN, to belong to this club!

As the trendy old Santa sprang to his sleigh,
I knew after MY house he would call it a day.
But I heard him exclaim, as he checked his GPS,
"HAPPY CHRISTMAS TO ALL, MAN, WAS THAT HOUSE A MESS!”

Wow, that was some poem. Good job. You have a talent now don't you??

And you didn't tell me if you saw Alan's neuropathy rap video. If you can't view it let me know and I'll send you the link. You'll die laughing.

mel

Mel, send it to me...PM me...I need a good laugh.

Wow!
 

You should publish this in a book Cyclops! It made me laugh out loud and trust me, nothing is doing this right now!!!:o

There is magic in this season even if it is in the hand of our own little elf.

Thanks for this, I enjoyed it a lot!
Billye

I have started my new career as a freelance writer:cool:....I know why they call it freelance....you end up doing it for free:p....actually, I have had a few things published here and there...and, since no one would want me coming at them with a needle nor calcuating their dose of medication any more:eek:...freelance writing just may be the ticket.

Glad you liked it....it was a spur of the moment thing.

With your encouragement SL, I just may work on that book.:hug:

Good job, cycleops.
 

You should send that into Neurology Now--they need a sense of humor.

You are hereby awarded one of my divinely-inspired literary no-prizes. The prize is worth approximately what you're getting paid for your freelance work. :D

Seriously, as one writer to another (though mine tends to be more within the non-fiction/critical/commentary realm), good job.

Now, where is that video of Alan?

Okay, here you go. Get ready to laugh your head off.

Oh, when you finish this one, go down to the bottom right where it says "more videos from eliz7212" and you'll see the rest of my videos.

here you go:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9sNDu2Bmn3U

I've been viewing all of your contributions, Mel.
 

Alan's rap was funny, but the one that made me laugh loudest was your take on the blouse. (And no, I don't think it's too revealing at all.)

You certainly have a little video industry going. Could be an income potential here . . .

Thank you my dear. I think I looked very good in that blouse (for a 60 year old broad!!!)

lol

Merry merry and all that. I just made like Santa Clause. I went to my neighbor around the corner. They have two dogs. I bought two little presents. You should have seen the doggies go crazy when I opened up the presents and it turned out to be little doggie hamburger toys. They are still chewing them.

Oh, want to have a really good laugh??? My friend's husband is from Poland. I wanted to impress him with my linguistic ability so I decided to send him an e-card in Polish. Of course I first went to my free online translation service.

It prompted me to put in whatever I wanted and then click on "from english to Polish:

So I typed in the following:

Merry Christmas Marty, I wish you good fortune and I hope this language translation comes out. Love Melody

Would you like to know how it translates into Polish (I found this out by doing the reverse, (copying and pasting the polish and putting it back into english). Thank god I did this.

This is what came out in the Polish Language.

"Merry Christmas Martini, I hope you go on welfare, and I hope this comes off of my tongue. Love TUNE!!!!


I never laughed so hard in all my life. I read it to him over the phone and they are still laughing.

Melody (now known as Tune)