I also don't know what the solution is to the age verification processes that may enable L. Labs to, definitively, ensure that teens are just that and not accessing the "adult-oriented" stuff that has been described in this thread :(. Possibly, it's what you mentioned, Jo55 - a letter addressed for parental verification. That would suit meeee :D.

I do know this, though: What had (formerly) been in place as a potential measure of verification has changed - done away with :(. I knew that I wouldn't be able to sleep until I saw it for myself, and, thus, I did sign up for an account, and zero verification was required. (Too, in all candor, when I also first joined SL, basic accounts also had a sign-up fee.)

Is it progress?

As far as encouraging adults to sign up, yes. But... to have no checks-and-balances on the age verification of teens is very distressing to me, as it is to others. To access the following, one has to be a member of SL and logged in:

SL members discussing age verification:
http://forums.secondlife.com/showthread.php?t=145573

A general search of the forums re: age verification:
http://forums.secondlife.com/search....archid=1936034

The upside is: People are discussing the topic. Yet... I believe it has to go further than "talk" and I also believe in corporate responsibility ;).

I may know computers, yet I also know that there are teens and others far more savvy than I - and ... :eek: How's a parent to request info. about a his or her teen's use of SL when nothing is required from parents during the sign-up process. Hmmm :(.

I've got to get some sleep tonight, and will think through my thoughts over the weekend, yet I will approach L. Labs with my thoughts on this, and they are not happy thoughts.

Hi Bobbi

I am so glad that you have verified this for yourself, that teens can sign up and access anywhere that a free account will take them (which is waaaaaaaaay too far) in SL:eek:

It would also be very naive of us to think for one moment that today's computer whiz kids dont know the ins and outs of accessing websites that are designated adult only. They know a lot more about computers and cyberspace than most adults do!

I wasnt going to comment directly here,as I realise this IS a sensitive issue for many people and for many and varied reasons...... but since you have seen the ease of sign up for yourself, I will

My teen son and I have a very open relationship and I casually asked him if he or his friends had ever played an online game called Second Life
He looked at me like I was an alien and said NO, he hadnt but Yes, he knew other kids who spend a lot of time there and that he didnt think it was a game I would want him to be involved in. When I asked why, his initial response was "sounds like a dumb game", but then he elaborated some on what others had told him, and I had no doubt that what Aussie and Melody were describing was true.:( and that it is a major talking point for kids!
(ps Southern Lady, yes, I know he hasnt been there cuz I do know how to monitor activity on the computer!)

I am VERY concerned about minors being exposed to stuff that can affect them forever, as well as being preyed upon by adults, whether directly or virtually:mad:

I am glad you will raise these concerns Bobbi, but in truth, my fear is that the commercialization of SL that I read about in that Boston Globe article cited a few pages ago,makes me very doubtful that the free sign up process will be changed.
http://www.boston.com/news/globe/liv...a_double_life/

I hope I am wrong.

Hi Chemar:
 

This is what you said:

"(ps Southern Lady, yes, I know he hasnt been there cuz I do know how to monitor activity on the computer"

My response: "do you know what he is doing when he goes to a friend's house?".

This, in no way, means that he is going on Second Life. It means that he has the ability to go on Second Life withou you being aware of it.

Today, with all the computer stuff, parents who are not computer literate (there ar many where I live), do not have a clue what their kids are doing on the computer.

An example (and believe me, it's a whopper), the kid next door to me was 6 when the family moved in. He had behavior problems from the beginning.
The dad, was a young dad with another kid. No mom. The great grandmother raised them. Believe me, the great grandmother wouldn't know a computer from a nintendo.

So they buy Anthony a comuter when he about 12. Of course they would call me in to explain everything for them and hook it up and get him on AOL.

I mistakenly gave him my AOL e-mail and for a long time, he would intant message me and send me inapropriate emails. I cornered his father one day and said "John, you have no on idea what Anthony is doing on the computer". He said "Melody, he's on a computer, what's the big thing?".

I changed my e-mail and that nonsense stopped but one day when he was 14 they called me in because his computer wouldn't work. They rarely went into his bedroom where the computer was. What was on the walls of his room almost got me sick. All kinds of porn. and he was 14. I immediately told his father who started yelling and I put a block on his computer (don't remember what I did to put the block on). But Anthony was so smart and he bragged to me that he got around it and besides, he could always go to his friend's house when the parents were at work and they could do whatever they wanted on the computer. This kid had no sense of moral values whatsoever. Bad bad stuff.

Everybody in the neighborhood couldn't stand him and they were afraid of him. Me? I always was especialy nice to him because he scared me and I wasn't about to be on his bad side.

So what's the ending of the story? Last week, Alan and I were coming home from a morning breakfast out, and we ran into John (Anthony is 17 now).

I asked John "So John, did Anthony ever get that job you were trying to get him"? He looked at me with a sadness and said "Hasn't it been quiet around here lately, you haven't seen Anthony around have you?" I said "what are you talking about?" and he says "Anthony is in jail, he pulled a knife on 5 chinese people who drove around with the cops, they ID'd my son and they have him on surveillance. He's been charged with 5 counts of armed robbery".

I just had a flashback to all the crazy bad stuff he did all his life and John would alway say "Oh, I did bad stuff too, but I turned out all right".

I said "john, what's going to happen to him"? John said "well, they are holding him on $30,000 bail, and I could raise that tomorrow if I wanted to but Anthony is where he needs to be". I went up on the porch and put my arms around him and said "From one parent to another, you need a hug".

Alan just stood there with his mouth open (we lost our son too but not to the prison system). No one on the block knows about my son. We are very private and you just don't go around announcing that you have a son with a mental illness.

I told John. "don't bail him out, he needs to learn a lesson, and this could be the BIG one". He said "but Melody, he doesn't seem remorseful at all, we tried to get the National Guard to take him but they don't want him ".

I wonder why???????????????

So this is what I get from what I'm observed about parents, computers, not being home. Kids will do whatever they want to do. parents have no clue.
It's just that simple. Unless you shadow a kid 24 hours a day, you have to just depend on the values you brought him up with and hope that they stayed in his brain.

But once he goes out in the world and hangs out with parollees, and steals cars, etc. etc. (Anthony did this). well, I guess you don't have a shot.

Very scary what is going on today.

Sorry to deviate from PN but every time I open a paper, all I see is this kid got arrested for this and that and there's a parent crying out loud "My son couldn't have knifed this kid, he's a good boy, he wouldn't that, I know my son".


In fact we would like to think we know everything about our children, but sadly that sometimes is not the case.

Times they are a-changing.

I promise, no more depressing stories. Only funny ones.

Oh the requip did absolutely nothing for Alan last night. He took one 0.5 at 11. was awake with tingling till 12. Took an 0.25 then. helped a bit. I had to massage him all over. finally fell asleep. It was raining cats and dogs and the barometer was nuts. Do you think that affected the requip working?

melody

Just an anecdote.
I have a 20 y.o. (my #3 son) who's now in college. when he was in H.S. we got him a laptop for school work, He'd have the laptop in his room (the family desktop is in the D.R.- traffic by it from L.R. to Kitchen, constantly- monitor in full view. He would sign in to his school system and go from there to anywhere he wanted, He had a blocked ISP account name that was under AOL's parental controls, but he found a way to get into the net without using AOL at all. I still don't know how he did it. I always thought you had to sign in using an ISP to get to the net. He got around that- somehow.
As I said, he's a 3rd yr college student now and never seemed to go any of the 'bad ways'- but I still wonder how he was able to access the net without using our (blocked) ISP (AOL).

Requip
 

Hi Melody - it possibly could have - although I don't know how. I find my PN is worse when the weather changes and like you, we had rain, rain, and more rain last night. I hope tonight will be better for him. Another thing I have tried when I could not sleep and seemed to work pretty good was Advil PM. The Tylenol PM did absolutely nothing for me, but the Advil did. Just a thought.

Diana

Oh, I never thought of Advil PM

I shall tell Alan.

Thanks so much Diana.

Regards,

melody

Hi Melody

yes, you are correct, and that is why I posted that piece about how it would be so very naive to think that kids today dont know how to go anywhere on the web that they want to

and yes, I wouldnt know what my son did at other people's homes, except for the fact that he actually prefers to have his friends come here, which is a BIG relief for mom:o ..........and yes, I am thankful that he has chosen his friends well, and also has this amazingly open relationship with me (and dad). I dont know if it is related to his TS/OCD or just in his nature, but he does feel comfortable to tell us stuff (sometimes more than I wanna know;) ) and I am honored that he feels he can be so direct with me.

I do feel it is SO important for parents to be very involved in their kids lives! Yes, we cant police them 24/7 and I really wouldnt want to do that, they have to learn and they have to grow as individuals, and develop their own responsibility, often by trial and error
But we can give them those solid foundations that hopefully will help them make the right choices, and especially let them always remember that we are not just their parents, but also their best friends

:)

Melody , Does Alan have myofascial pain also?
Triggerpoints or muscle spasms?

The weather really affects those types of things.

If the Internet industries
 

really wanted a reasonably secure form of age verification, we'd have it. Face it, we have no privacy today anyway. The NSA listens to your phone calls (yes, yours). Homeland Security will put a hold on your credit card account if you make an unusually large payment, such as paying off your balances (happened to two schoolteachers in Jersey). And anytime you use the Internet, you leave a trail behind for all to see. So, I just don't believe there isn't room for big improvement.

That said, it comes back to personal and parental responsibility. Every time there's a bad story, there's an outcry to "clean up" the entire Web to make it safe for five year olds. That applies not only to "adult" sites, but to photos of Abu Graib, clinical discussions of sexuality and health, political blogs where people occasionally use cusswords, and so on. That's ridiculous.

While it's impossible to do everything, I'm amazed at the number of parents who do nothing. They buy their kids a computer, let him put it in his bedroom instead of a public place, never even try to limit access, and never discuss the responsibilities that come with having a PC.

Come to think of it, when I was growing up, every new privelege came with an annoying lecture about responsibility. Today, I guess those parents who don't take responsibility for themselves can't teach it to their kids.

it's not just at home where they have access steve. they have them in the school. these kids are pretty dang smart. the schools are fooling themselves if they think the one little program they install keeps the kids safe or off the sites they should go on.