[AngelBobZed]

Hello.. Im new here and have been needing to talk about
the problems I have with all the mental illnesses Ive been
diagnosed with which are = PTSD, mood problems, anorexia
depression, MPD, schitzo affective disorder and find all this
very difficult to explain to others how it affects me in my
day to day living.

My mum went on holiday awhile ago to america to see my bro.
Ive been going to her house sometimes to do my pets (she
keeps my budgies etc at hers). I live in scotland by myself
and see psyche nurses alot... but I feel something is missing
and my nurses isnt addressing my needs at all coz she goes
on about voices more than flashes... I dont hear much other
than my alters out my mouth... but its very visual with the PTSD,
shes not interested in the MPD/DID... and Ive been battling with
them for recognition that Im not "me" anymore Im "many" now
and it was always that way for us.

I usually see alot when Im falling asleep at night... the flash is so
fast I cant make out much.. it looks like pictures of other people
and looks abit like what we've verbalized to each other. What we
talk about to each other. Anyways thanks for reading my intro.

JJ & GG

[Snoopy]

Hello AngelBobZed and Welcome to NeuroTalk.

When you make references to "flashes" I am guessing you are referring to flashbacks? You have alot going on, it must be very difficult for you

I am not familiar with healthcare in Scotland but if you are able to see a Psychotherapist h/she could be very helpful or is that what your nurses are?

There is another forum (part of NeuroTalk), Psych Central, which is a mental health forum, that you may also find helpful.

Here is the link to PsychCentral:
http://forums.psychcentral.com/forumdisplay.php?f=15

[AngelBobZed]

Originally Posted by Snoopy

Hello .... Welcome to NeuroTalk.

Thankyou for your nice welcome :-)

.... "flashes" .... flashbacks? ....

Yes... I feel fear when it happens

....Psychotherapist .... nurses are?

Yes but that confuses me when they dont talk about that as such they
wont stop going on about an active healthy life but again dont talk about that much... all I can make out is comments from them like yes good or no weird... and this long list of mistakes of all the should nots of how to go about doing things.... and I dont feel very well listening to the bits about their own mistakes or miseries about their family.... that confuses me.. I dont get it at all why people are the way they are if they are too different from me and cant see it my way at all.. I cant cope when they think Im a liar so it makes me ill when they call me names like mug or skinny or such... Im not enjoying it quite as much as my nurse claims she enjoys my nice company when I dont feel that way either... anyways sorry to complain thats all I do is moan about things not being right for me and constantly having a go at myself for weaknesses and failures and when I wasnt mentally myself anymore what it was that changed me.. Thanks for reading.. :-)

JJ & GG

[Snoopy]

It's okay to complain, sometimes it helps. I am sorry you don't feel listened too, that must be very difficult for you. I don't know you but I am sure you are a good person and do not deserve to be called names.

Flashbacks can be very scary and very real, I am so sorry you have to experience them.

[tamiloo]

So good to have you board!!

You said you have a hard time telling people how you feel and why...I have the same problem.

I calender numerous times during the year...right now is one of those times. I have huge fears of doing almost everything. I fear leaving my bedroom...big time going out...shopping and the such. I want to cry but won't.

My family loves me so much and never complain when I get behind with everything domestic.

I feel very undeserving of their love...I know I feel so much better when I can force myself to do just anything...very hard time right now....thanks for reading my long post...

Please know in my own way I do understand....