please God exist
 

I don't want to believe. Because I am scared. I want to believe you because you are really fair. The great people I have met on this board make me believe that you are there but I need more strength because I am weak and need your love as do a lot of us on this board. Please show yourself to me and love us

dear friend
you did the first step
now look for the signs
he will reveal himself over and over
but because you asked
i could tell you i believe and he has
shown himself
i pick up the bible
whatever or however i might be feeling
randomly opening the book
and i kid you not
he speaks to me directly
i read exactly what i needed to hear
now you tell me how is "that" possible
only i pray you hear me
look for the signs
through people
i tell you no lie
may you feel him

Hello Markneil
 

It is OK to question, to explore, to acknowledge our own weakness in faith. That is the process to faith. Glad to have you here at Neuro Talk. :Dginnie

Mark,

If you allow and ask; pray your eyes will be open to what is happening around you. So often we take for granted or just don't realize God is there. Just the fact that you are asking is showing God you want to know Him.

A while back, I had prayed for someone dear to me that was terminally ill. I had prayed asking God to allow certain things to happen before and after his death.

The day this person passed; I thanked God that night for allowing me the eyes to see all the beauty of the day. All I asked was granted. Had I not been given the gift to see (because I asked), I would have been very upset what had taken place that day; but again; I and my family saw the "beauty" that took place.

When we are scared or worried; God is always there to listen.


Gerry

I just don't know what he cn do at this point. job, health, savings, friends, family...everything is gone. he is a little late I think. I guess the kindest thing he could so is take me. maybe that is the only thing he could do at this point. I am glad he answered your prayers.

Hi Mark
 

I felt as you did. Really I did. I will be a friend. No one has to be alone to go through all these issues. We all need someone who can understand our sorrow, our pain and loss. Please keep on trucking, there still is the beauty around you if you will open your eyes. I am in my garden a lot, just clipping away. This brings peace. I listen to Reggae music, which can be so uplifting. I read. I do all kinds of things to take my mind from pain. I also came here and stayed to make new friends. This put me on the path to a better frame of mind. When I came here, I was about ready to chuck it in too. It is 5 years later, many of the same issues but in my head I am better. I so much want that to happen for you. Love, Friendship, these are the things that God gives us to help us. This site can help you to be in a better place. So can God. He will call you on his own time. Allow life to unfold. It can and does get better if you choose to go in that direction. Be at peace. ginnie:grouphug:

listen my friend mark
you are at your turning point
and you don't even now it yet
everything you lost
i understand
we understand
what hurts the most is
my livelihood
MY JOB
it was taken
just like that
my family
friends
job
money
savings
all takes me into a
DEEP depression
if i let myself go there
and there are times i do
i have a shrink i have
been with
since my life was changed
just like that
as i woke up to get ready for work
then after 2 failed surgeries
while bed ridden
found a lump in my right breast
cancer
took both off

i ask you this
did you ever cry so hard
to want to feel God
i mean so hard
that the town could hear your wails
i wanted God
not my job
family
money
friends
possessions
but
Him
i ask to feel him
and i did
i'm not a crazy person
but a blessed one
to have my faith build
with the help of the people
ON THESE BOARDS
you reach out too
i am here
we are here
i won't go anywhere
we won't go anywhere
especially when you are
going through what we all have
at one point or another
you are not any different then the
rest of us
who
Want to feel God

be still
be silent
pray
listen to your dialogue
with Him
let it happen

keep searching
you are His child
we all are
do not let evil
win

it lurking all the time
just waiting for you
to give up your Faith
hang on as i do
do not give your soul to the devil
working real hard to just have
you at the edge of a cliff

be wise
heed to the warning

the suggestions expressed here
is all in good taste and real concerns
and intentions

at one point not long ago
i prayed to just die
i'll be at peace
but that is not the peace i am looking for
so i hang in
some days are better than others
and am learning everyday

to have been where you are now
I know
me

Eva,
you have such a big heart and have been through so much. and yet you and these others who have answered my plea really care if i live or die and it is so touching. i can't lie, all i wanted in life was money, cars, women, a fancy house and i was close to getting it all then i fell into a depression and did dangerous thins that led to my subsequent head injuries and downfall. you lost so much and yet you believe that God is there for us. I lost my father 32 years ago and stopped believing then pretty much. i am 46, no kids, everything gone, i feel like i don't matter. what is one person out of 6 billion. why should God care about me. I wasn't happy with money and health. maybe i don't know how to be happy. but i am thankful for you and ginnie and ger who have responded.

your listening dear mark
you have already expressed
what Isn't important in your life
and you know what
maybe you and i and others
may have felt we don't know how to be
Happy
what is Happy
it could apply in so many areas
but i do know for myself 53
i have been single since my separation in 1984
and divorced
my father decided to kill himself i was 19
long story
shot himself in the heart in his car
left a note
so i kind of get it at this point
and i am sure it has affected many
horrible decisions
didn't have the best prototype for parents
yeah
a pretty poop y hand dealt
but i wouldn't be who i am today
because of all the unfair happenings
my rewards are spiritual
it is fine to have the finer things in life
if acquired with Gods love
do not give up
do not think you do not matter
you do
so start seeing it
you will see it
focus
me

Mark The Lord loves you,and He wants to show you more about who He is. There is a Bible verse in the New Testament,in the book of Romans chapter 10,verse 17 that says this.

So then faith comes by hearing,and hearing by the word of God.

This means to read,or listen to the Bible.

I would recommend that you get a bible,and start reading it. You might want to start with the gospel of John.

I'd also recommend for you to read through the book of Psalm in the old testament. You have nothing to fear reaching out to God. He is there for you,and you are here for Him. Brokenfriend:grouphug:

i have read a lot of your posts on the boards and you are a very caring person with a big heart. thanks for the advice. i shall take it. i used to read psalms when i was younger and i wondered what suffering the person who wrote the at the time was going through.

Hi Mark
 

The Bible is hard, to just pick up and start to read. King James version has an older language. Try an easy read, there is one called "Jesus Calling" It is a group of passages where Jesus pretends to talk to you personally. You swear, it is him! It is a different way of looking at what Jesus would say to us in this modern day and age.
Also as far as a bible goes if you choose to get one, get one that has some explanation to go along with it. NIV. It is History after all. I hope today finds you with hope, new friends, and more at ease. Ginnie:hug:

God is always there,
 

God give us a willing soul, we have to choose Him, He is just waiting to show us how much he loves and care for us. Open the door to your soul and allow Him to enter

[QUOTE=markneil1212;1085201]I just don't know what he cn do at this point. job, health, savings, friends, family...everything is gone. he is a little late I think. I guess the kindest thing he could so is take me. maybe that is the only thing he could do at this point. I am glad he answered your prayers.[/QUOTE


Mark,

Prayers answered are not always in the form of a miracle; but in the ability to cope and accept each day and doing the best we can, as well as seeing Him in much of the beauty around us.

When I say my prayers were answered; it was witnessing the beauty in what could have been looked upon as a horrific death. I was and my family able to see His handiwork in all that had passed.

We become aware of God when we open our hearts and let Him in. It is difficult when a heart is closed to Him. He allows many things to get in our path to Him; but only we can accept that path. God has given us the free will to choose.


Gerry

Welcome rquinn1997. :Tip-Hat:

Oh my friend... "I don't know what he can do at this point..."? Everything.

If we are reliant upon job, health, savings, friends and yes, even family to make us happy - then happiness is fleeting and illusory. True happiness does not wax and wane like the moon. I think perhaps some of these things on your list were interfering with your ability to find joy - and so they were removed. If you find what you are seeking then I assure you, you will find the price was minimal.

In the middle of your own trials, you find that you can be happy for someone else? Amazing compassion.

Who you seek is seeking you.

Beautiful
Just so awesomely
beautiful
amen

Inducing my self.
 

Good morning Everyone.I'm new to this site.I call my self truebliever here because in jan 2014.I was saved.I'm a 53 yr mom of a special needs adult daughter who has life threatening illness.I'm also a wife.In jan I started having anxiety. The lord led me to Joyce meyer I was watching her when I was saved..I always knew of God, but I never really had a personal relationship with me, till now.Just wanted to introduce my self.If I can help anyone please just yell.Have a bless day.:hug:Truebliever

Hi true believer
 

Did Joyce Meyer write the book called "Normal is just a setting on a Hair dryer" I remember her name, and listening to her someplace....ginnie

Hi markneill1212,

I have known of you and your many troubles from the traumatic brain site on this forum. I want you to know I can tell you are hurt, confused, but still wanting a reason to believe that God is real. I can tell you beyond a doubt, He is.

You have been suffering for so long. But you want to believe in something greater than what your eyes and your life experience has shown you so far. You have been given this chance to be encouraged to continue to seek God and His son, Jesus, who was sacrificed for the sins of the world so that we can believe that He rose from the dead and His shed blood washes our sins away, restoring our lost relationship to God.

As we all look for restoration of our physical bodies here, so we understand that God desires the restoration of our relationship with Him. He loves you, Mark, and He always has. He is reaching out to you through the fine people on this site. You can find His peace and love to be more than sufficient for you, in any circumstance. You are precious to Him; He died on a cross for you so you can experience eternal life and His constant love and care while we are still on this earth.

He just wants all of us to trust Him. Psalm 51:17 say, " My sacrifice, O God, is a broken spirit, a broken and contrite heart you, O God, will not despise." (NIV)
He is not mad at you, or punishing you because you expressed doubt. He sees your broken spirit and heart. "Contrite" means feeling or showing sorrow or remorse for sin or shortcoming. We have all come short of God's glory, but He wishes to give us a new life with a clean slate if we trust Him to be in control of our lives. And He is faithful when we do.

I hope and pray you will read the Bible and pray or just talk to Him. He will lead you to the truth and you will never be the same again, because He loves you that much.
Take care and God bless you, Mark. M-i-m

Mark I normally post in the RSD forum. You just popped in there yesterday. Anyways, I have it bookmarked and go straight there rather than through the main page. But for some reason I went through the main Neurotalk page a minute ago and was immediately drawn to this thread title. I didn't see your name - just clicked and read....

When everything is taken from you and you break down and you ask... just ask... our Creator ALWAYS answers. I am bawling my eyes out reading this thread because I know he just did

You folks are amazing
especially you Mark

Guys, you are all incredibly kind and spiritual people.
But God is not finding me or I am not finding him.

The devastation of the past is only surmounted by the horrors the future may bring in my life.

I have searched and searched and see no sign of God's plan in this. or his help.
He may well exist. But even If he did, I have a feeling He and I would not see eye to eye and choose to go our own ways.

I have loved God and hated God in the past. Now, the worst of all, I am indifferent to God.

God bless you all for your faith

Mark. God is there. Believe me. He is real. Pray as sincerely as you can. We have all sinned. Pray for Jesus to forgive you for your sins,and ask Him to come into your heart,and show you His goodness.

The only reason that I'm still alive is because God intervened in my life. If you seek Him,you will find Him. Remember what I said about Faith comes by hearing,and hearing the word of God. I have a New King James Bible. Some people Like the New International Version of the Bible. I have the New International Version in the front seat of my car. I take the New King James Version to church.

Remember that faith,and His Bible(Letter,Book,Instructions)go together. Please try to read the Gospel of John. Take it slow,and easy. If you do this you will find God(Jesus).

I'm being truthful. I've read the Bible from the beginning to the end. He opens doors little,by little for you to find Him. Please trust me,and please be patient. I read some of the Psalm yesterday.

It's like we are the dry land,and the Lord brings drizzle,and then rain to us.
If you read through the Bible that drizzle,then rain will come.

Please trust me. He has made a way for you. BF:grouphug::smileypray:

Brokenfriend,

you are a good man. I have read many of your posts.

I am not suicidal but I am not afraid of not existing.

I think I am too tired to fight anymore or seek redemption.

and with my weight, other health factors, and my vices, I think that day is not to far and maybe for the best.

But then who knows? human bodies seem to be able to take a beating and keep going.

And if there is a God, I guess he will do what he must when I die.

you area good man for caring. I see your goodness in all of your posts.

Hey Mark. I'm tired too. God will take you where you are. He will hear anyone who calls upon him. Jesus died for you on the cross. He took on our sins so that we may be saved. Will you receive what He's done for you,and what He will do for you?

My life was all messed up. I was a alcoholic for a long time,and skeptical. Not any more,and God really helped me. He will help you. Please let him. Please pray for Jesus to come into your heart,and to forgive you for your sins,and he will.

Then watch doors open up to you slowly,but surely. He will do it. I know that he will. He wants to. God has sent out his messengers. He will make a plan for you,and you will be glad exceedingly.

I can see where he helped me,and steared me around,and opened doors for me so that I could be helped.

BF:grouphug::hug::smileypray:

I want to also say that God not only exists,he's there for ever,and ever,and ever,and on,and on,and on. In Hebrews 13:8 it says Jesus Christ the same yesterday,today,and forever. Rev 1:18 and the living One:and was dead;and behold,I am alive forevermore,Amen;and have the keys of hell and of death.
So He's .....Alive Forevermore.... It's impossible for God to lie...

I had a blockage where I could not tell anything about the future. I was like a book with the last half of the book ripped out of it. I had no hope at that time for years,but he was working on me. I came to the utter end of myself,and asked Jesus to come into my heart,and save me. He did. Isn't that fantastic!!!

I am so excited about being able to share this with Mark.

Rev 3:20 verse says...Behold,I stand at the door,and knock. If anyman hears my voice and opens the door,I will come into him,and will sup with him,and he with me.

That verse says...any man... You,me,or anyone else. This again is fantastic. This is the good news that you hear about.

So excited. Brokenfriend:grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::smileyp ray:

im thankful that I'm alive after the brain injuries but hope to be able to have a life outside the house again and not suffer physically and thus mentally so much. I prayed so hard after the injury but got worse and worse until I had to quit my job. I kind of gave up praying

Mark I'm sorry about your sufferings. God helps us to cope with life with sufferings. I've been praying for decades to cope with my mental health issues.

I've noticed that God has opened the right doors for me. In the reading of the books of Psalm,and the book of Job in the Bible,you can see that many people suffer at times in their lives. It is written in the book of Job,that He suffered many tremendous troubles,and illnesses at the same time. Job hated the day that he was born at that time.

If we had it made,there would be no need for faith,and love. Most people would become selfish,self-centered,and narcissistic. Faith keeps us going despite the troubles that we go through,and gives us humility.

Don't give up. I have felt like giving up many times,but I feel a need to keep going,and believing. Life is so very difficult at times. Take care. BF :grouphug:

But...but...I do have it made. Love is what makes it so. :)

Mark. I'm sorry if I put to much pressure on you. I know how faith has helped me,and I want everyone to have the same help. God exists. BF:grouphug:

you area great guy and certainly didn't put too much pressure on me. i am glad your faith gives you so much comfort and support. i can see wanting to share that.

Hi Mark
 

I am here for you too. Never give up. There are people including me who care. If not for these individuals I have met right here, who knows what emotional turmoil I would be in. Had terrible news today, but somehow It is better because I am not alone, I have God, and I have the folks here to help support me. Hang in there Mark. The more helpless we become, the more we depend on those good souls on earth to support us. Write anytime. My physical ailments are not the only that are important on these boards. WE all matter. God is there Mark, he lives in each and ever one of us who cares about another human soul. ginnie:hug::grouphug:

Whenever I feel like my life if falling apart and that there is no way out, I get this calming feeling from God. It's a feeling I know he gives me to remind me that everything will be alright because He is always with me and won't let me down. He has and always will be there for me to help me to find the light I need to see at the end of the tunnel. He has never let me down. You just have to keep the faith and believe with all of your heart that God will not let you down either because He won't. He is always by our side.

I'm curious Mark, have you some concept of God that you hope exists?

It could be, that if I were looking to buy a car and limited myself to American cars or to red cars, that I might miss a very good deal. There might be a nice white Ferrari for sale right down the road for $600 but I haven't included foreign models or white cars into my search and so I've missed it.

If you are still seeking and still haven't found, perhaps you are putting God into a box that is simply ill-fitting.