High School Reproductive Health Review Sheet
 

My 16 yr old daughter brought home a Review packet for her Health/Reproductive Class. She didn't feel comfortable completing the information by herself, so she did ask for our help. There were several questions that I felt were vague, out of line and just plain wrong. We helped her complete the packet, indicating answers that we were together on as a family, I also informed the teacher on the "sheets" my opinion and how we completed as a family and signed it so that they would know that I had reviewed and helped. I also notified her, the principal and the president of the school board via email what we had done, and my displeasure with many of the vague, out of line questions. I'll post the #1 question that brought the most concern and I'd like to get others opinions. The teacher did take things out on my daughter, but she only has 3 more days of class with this "teacher", so I told her to do the best she can and if she feels uncomfortable or singled out again, to ask nicely twice to be excused to go to the office to call home and on the third time if refused, to just politely say excuse me and walk out of the class and go directly to the office and call. So, here's the post, and I would appreciate your comments, and will provide the teacher's answer after I have several responses:).

Please keep in mind that this is called a "REPRODUCTIVE HEALTH REVIEW SHEET", also - all questions on this sheet related to sex education and STDs (now called STIs).

The question you posted seemed confusing to me...is it my cog fog or is the question not clear?

No, Debbie, it is very vague. It would depend on the age of the person answering the question. And also their own personal definition of "intimacy". There can be lots of different definitions of "intimacy". I would not want my child to have to answer questions like these.

This is the problem I had with the question. The teacher told me that she was going towards "friendship/secrets" and not "physical" (sexual). I told her that she needs to re-word it then, ask for the different types of intimacy, and leave the listing/naming off of it. Her answer was that she would have listed or named her mom and her cousin. Could you imagine the problems if a kid listed their father, uncle, grandparent or even a T-E-A-C-H-E-R?

I also have a problem with another question she had on there regarding where a mom could drop off her baby and not have any problems. To me, this is encouraging and giving these kids and "option out" of a situation that is not one to be taken lightly. Obviously, a woman (even a teenager) has 9 months to try and figure out whether they want to keep the baby or give the baby up for adoption. If they want to be adults, to do adult things, why not teach them that they are not prepared for certain situations instead of encouraging them by giving them another option.

Sorry if it seems confusing, but this is exactly how the question was posed without the poll answers. I put the possible answers there to show where the teacher was headed, but lacked to use the correct wording. Without the poll answers, I took the question in the context of being intimate and listing "partners" (2), not as being special friends.

I think lots of other parents will probably chime in on this once they know what's going on. I can't believe the school system is even opening this can of worms. :confused:

I think when I sent an email to the president of the school board (who works closely with the HIPPA guidelines) and mentioned privacy on this issue, I got an "answer" from the teacher.

She was incredibly mean to my daughter on Friday, but my daughter has only 3 days left of the trimester. The school board meets again on next week, and if she continues to mistreat my daughter, then I am going to be there along with the "work sheet" for the other parents, teachers and school board members to "fill out".

This makes me angry - then when we point out issues with it, she mistreats and points out what happened in front of the class. A bunch of kids were asking my daughter why she showed her homework to her parents. Um, isn't that what parents are suppose to do? Aren't we also teachers?

IMO, that "teacher" doesn't have any business working with kids.

This teacher is totally crazy!! My daughter came home extremely upset again. She gave her a horrible grade on the paper we worked on together. Apparently, she decided that the ones that were in my handwriting were not acceptable, and counted them as "no answers".

I have a call into the principal, as well as the superintendent's office. School board meets tomorrow evening. Even as crappy as I am feeling, I will drag myself to this meeting!

I called one of my daughter's friends last night and spoke to her mom. She didn't know about all the questions on the sheet, especially the one I am really upset over. I also talked to the secretary at the superintendent's office. Both of these women could not believe this question, and agreed with me. It should not be worded this way.

I won't let my daughter take any crap from this teacher. I told her if she has any problems to call me right away. Even though the trimester ends tomorrow, there is no need for her to let it go.

intimacy is many things, to many people. You cant tag it on a handout and give right or wrong marks for the answers. You can only garner information about the thought process of the crowd reporting it.

This teacher needs to be reintroduced to where the line is when working with kids. If this were college level, that might be fine, but when working with teens...she needs to be schooled. I hope you report her.

This woman is nuts! Does she not understand that in most cases intimacy is private. In fact that is one of many definitions. I would certainly ask the teacher to define it herself and name 2 people she was intimate with. The fact that she asked the students to name 2 people is just wrong and none of her business - whether the "intimacy" was sexual or not. I would like to think that the teacher discussed the various definitions of intimacy BEFORE she gave the students the handout.

What's even worse, she's taking it out on your DD. Not cool at all. She is the grown up and needs to behave like a grown up and set an example to the students. Also, it's been my experience with DDs that we had the option to opt out of that portion of the class. They send info to the parents and the parents can make the choice of whether or not they want their child in that part of the class. I allowed DDs to take that part of the health class and we had many discussions based on the class. If at any time I wanted to pull DDs from the class based on what was being discussed, I could.

Good luck in your fight, Patti! Let us know how it goes.

Well, the principal called me yesterday. I don't know why it took a call from the superintendent's office telling him to call to do so. (which smile indicates sarcasm?)

He spent more time making sure my last name was really Christmas then he did discussing the issue. He told me he talked with the teacher, and "they" decided that my daughter would be given full credit for the review sheet she and I filled out. He also discussed how the school is one of the first that has offered a 12 week health/sex ed class, and are trying to following Michigan's newly formed structure. I asked him if he read the review, and he stated he had it in his hands. Of course, he had difficulty removing himself as a teacher from the intimacy question until I informed him that when I spoke with the secretary at the superintendent's office as well as another parent. He then agreed and gave in to the fact that it could indeed be worded differently. I told him that the crap the teacher was doing to my daughter, and he said that she wasn't trying to make my daughter feel uncomfortable, that my daughter is a very strong, intelligent student and that she would not receive any negative grading for this class. I told him how my daughter failed an anatomy test Friday afternoon (the day all this stuff went down) because she didn't want to be with the teacher, and that she didn't want to re-take it because she would have to be alone with the teacher.

He then started brushing me off the phone - oops, I just looked at my watch, got a meeting at the superintendent's office, blah blah blah. To me, if I were "principal", when I received the first email last week from a concerned parent, I would not have taken so long to get back with the parent. I also would not brush the parent off. If it wasn't a brush off, why wouldn't someone in his position make sure he had "time" to talk to me? If I feel well enough, even though today is the last day my daughter is in this class, I am still thinking about going to the school board meeting tonight. I might just call my daughter's friend's mom and ask her if she and her husband are going. If so, I will definitely drag myself down there...

I'll keep you all posted - sometimes, you have to teach your kids not only what right from wrong, but to also stand up for what they believe in. If I do go, I plan of taking my daughter and having her address the school board.

PLEASE go to the school board meeting. being dismissed by the very folks that are in charge of protecting and educating your daughter is NOT a good sign. They need to know that you are watching, and you are keeping score. You DO check every peice of home work, and assignment that comes home with this child, as well as discuss ALL activities that happen on school grounds. This is UNACCEPTABLE! Make sure you ask for your child to be allowed a make up test for that anatomy thing.

Go get um! grrrrr! :mad:

If you speak with him again I'd try and record the conversation. Some states that's not legal unless you notify the other party but you can check and see what your states laws are.

This question is soo out of line!!

sometimes I really wonder what these teachers are thinking when they come up with lessons and things like this.

Almost sounds like they are just being nosy and wanting to dig into kids lives. To see what they can find out.:(