NeuroTalk Support Groups

NeuroTalk Support Groups (https://www.neurotalk.org/)
-   Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy (RSD and CRPS) (https://www.neurotalk.org/reflex-sympathetic-dystrophy-rsd-and-crps-/)
-   -   The Call (https://www.neurotalk.org/reflex-sympathetic-dystrophy-rsd-and-crps-/230628-call.html)

Always_Believe 01-04-2016 10:25 AM

The Call
 
As I figure the last session of the pain program through RIC (Rehab Institute of Chicago) has recently completed, I placed a call to see where I am on the wait list and when the next session starts.

Please cross your fingers, say a prayer, throw salt, send good thoughts...whatever you do for luck/miracles/etc. The answer will guide my next steps and the direction I will take for the future.

Thank you


RSD ME 01-04-2016 11:57 AM

i'm praying for you Always. hope you get a call saying you are next in line for the next session. hugs coming your way.

Littlepaw 01-04-2016 12:47 PM

Can do! All of the above are coming for good measure. I am going out with salt now...

Let us know what you hear.
Sending hugs and healing love, :hug:

-Spike- 01-04-2016 03:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RSD ME (Post 1191390)
i'm praying for you Always. hope you get a call saying you are next in line for the next session. hugs coming your way.

You got it. Oh, and can you also do something so that the Cubs will win the World Series, while you are at it!? I tried being good to see if that would work, but that didn't go so well. I think I just jinxed them.

You are in my prayers. I hope you are first on the list!

Always_Believe 01-04-2016 03:49 PM

Ugh. While I am still hopeful (for a few more minutes), I happened to get a call from my insurance case manager today.

I am on a roll here I guess. What part of my function has decreased to the point of
a) once/week shower
b) ambulation/activity limited to bathroom & bed for the past 5 weeks
do these doctors not understand??? I had to ask my case manager to look into wheelchairs. She suggested I maybe consider another doctor in Chicago. Hello, 2 hour train ride is no bueno for the pain/swelling...I only agreed to RIC because of the "possibilities" it holds...possibilities I might add that I have been waiting for since mid-September.

I am seriously about to give up. I have a healthcare team that simply does not care that they have a patient whose condition is rapidly declining nearly entirely due to inadequate (read non-existent) pain management. Damn CDC/FDA.

Always_Believe 01-04-2016 03:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by -Spike- (Post 1191429)
You got it. Oh, and can you also do something so that the Cubs will win the World Series, while you are at it!? I tried being good to see if that would work, but that didn't go so well. I think I just jinxed them.

You are in my prayers. I hope you are first on the list!

Sorry Spike...my son is a HUGE Sox fan...even was Hero of The Game a few years ago. (wish I could post a link....)

-Spike- 01-04-2016 04:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Always_Believe (Post 1191432)
Sorry Spike...my son is a HUGE Sox fan...even was Hero of The Game a few years ago. (wish I could post a link....)

Too funny! I used to serve at a church in Yorkville. Oh.. and may I ask.. Who are the Sox? Oh, yeah yeah.. the Red Sox... Now I remember. GRIN.. Seriously, I hope your son's team does well, The Chicago White Sox.

You continue to be in my prayers. I just wish I knew why CRPS is such a difficult disease to get adequate care for. It really does get frustrating sometimes. I wish you well.

Always_Believe 01-04-2016 04:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by -Spike- (Post 1191437)
Too funny! I used to serve at a church in Yorkville. Oh.. and may I ask.. Who are the Sox? Oh, yeah yeah.. the Red Sox... Now I remember. GRIN.. Seriously, I hope your son's team does well, The Chicago White Sox.

You continue to be in my prayers. I just wish I knew why CRPS is such a difficult disease to get adequate care for. It really does get frustrating sometimes. I wish you well.

It is indeed pitiful.
Thank you for keeping me in your thoughts.
(Chicago White Sox Hero of the game 9/28/12 happens to be his Mamma's hero too :wink:)

-Spike- 01-04-2016 04:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Always_Believe (Post 1191440)

(Chicago White Sox Hero of the game 9/28/12 happens to be his Mamma's hero too :wink:)

You mean, Ernie Banks is not your hero? You're going to make me cry! :eek:

Always_Believe 01-04-2016 05:08 PM

Just got a call from my insurance case manager...RIC can't get me in until March or April

I'm done

-Spike- 01-04-2016 06:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Always_Believe (Post 1191447)
Just got a call from my insurance case manager...RIC can't get me in until March or April

I'm done

Is it possible for you to put your name on that list just as quickly as possible? January, February, and then the next thing you know, you are there in March! I know that that is not ideal, but.. can that possibly work? Either way, not getting in this time has to be hard. You were so looking forward to it too!

:(

-Spike-

Always_Believe 01-04-2016 07:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by -Spike- (Post 1191467)
Is it possible for you to put your name on that list just as quickly as possible? January, February, and then the next thing you know, you are there in March! I know that that is not ideal, but.. can that possibly work? Either way, not getting in this time has to be hard. You were so looking forward to it too!

:(

-Spike-

I've been on the list since SEPTEMBER. I cannot continue like this. I can barely make it to the bathroom and back and none of my 7 doctors give a hoot. I have to completely 100% give up my nursing degree now. No chance of rehab in time, even with an extension. I will not be able to pay my property taxes without being able to function well enough for a job in time for June's payment. My daughter is planning on moving out in February and if I can't even shower more than once/week, how can I eat? Do laundry? Take out the garbage? Get the mail?How do doctors not consider those things?

Hopefully tonight I can go to sleep & not wake up...THAT is my very last hope now.

Littlepaw 01-04-2016 08:15 PM

I am so sorry to see you struggling so much :(, but I am still holding on to hope for you.

There may be options yet.

Could you consider a boarder like a nursing student, early education or social work type to trade your daughter's room for assistance with meals and help around the house, etc? I would've been really grateful for an opportunity like that.

Would being in Chicago bump you up on the list any? You have family there right? I am wondering if there is a more intensive program with an opening or one coming soon. I don't know that once a week will get you to your goals as much trouble as you are having.

Can you fire any of your doctors? Easier said than done with insurance sometimes. I ditched the ones who weren't helpful and had no interest in moving me forward.

Any thoughts on those resources I sent along a while back? I didn't start getting help till I went that route. Just a thought....

Hang in there Girl. I am still rooting for you and sending prayers. :hug:

-Spike- 01-04-2016 08:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Always_Believe (Post 1191470)
I've been on the list since SEPTEMBER. I cannot continue like this. I can barely make it to the bathroom and back and none of my 7 doctors give a hoot. I have to completely 100% give up my nursing degree now. No chance of rehab in time, even with an extension. I will not be able to pay my property taxes without being able to function well enough for a job in time for June's payment. My daughter is planning on moving out in February and if I can't even shower more than once/week, how can I eat? Do laundry? Take out the garbage? Get the mail?How do doctors not consider those things?

Hopefully tonight I can go to sleep & not wake up...THAT is my very last hope now.

Are you on disability or SSI? I apologize. I am not current on your history. From the sound of it, you sound as if you should qualify for those things. And Ma'am, is there someone in the town that you live in that you can phone and talk to? You have so many great things around you-- your son, your daughter, your degree, your home. You Hang in there! You are so much more than CRPS.

Always_Believe 01-04-2016 09:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Littlepaw (Post 1191478)
I am so sorry to see you struggling so much :(, but I am still holding on to hope for you.

There may be options yet.

Could you consider a boarder like a nursing student, early education or social work type to trade your daughter's room for assistance with meals and help around the house, etc? I would've been really grateful for an opportunity like that.

Would being in Chicago bump you up on the list any? You have family there right? I am wondering if there is a more intensive program with an opening or one coming soon. I don't know that once a week will get you to your goals as much trouble as you are having.

Can you fire any of your doctors? Easier said than done with insurance sometimes. I ditched the ones who weren't helpful and had no interest in moving me forward.

Any thoughts on those resources I sent along a while back? I didn't start getting help till I went that route. Just a thought....

Hang in there Girl. I am still rooting for you and sending prayers. :hug:

I spoke to my case manager about some kind of inpatient program. While it's sort of possible, still needs a doctor's order, which I can't seem to be able to get.

Location means nothing regarding the program. I'm so angry that they would tell me "12 weeks because we just started one" in September and now it's another 12 weeks. And that they couldn't even take 5 minutes to call me themselves.

My problem with finding a new doc is that I am so limited on medicaid. In addition to the fact that most PM clinics run 2 months out for appts. And then there's that pesky, I've tried all the "non-narcotics" that the insurance will cover, can we try a low dose narcotic? you know...just to see if it works like it did 15 months ago when I could function?

I know narcotics are not the best solution for CRPS/neuropathy, but I'm not looking for 0 on the pain scale, I'm looking to be able to stay around a 4-5 no matter what I'm doing (within reason of course). I was on hella pain meds for my endometriosis for over 2 years. Never had a problem. Was on hella ativan for 2 years. Never had a problem.

Why is it that I can put so much faith in my doctors but they can't put any in me???

I will call my CM tomorrow and ask about the NS at Northwestern. Madison won't be an option until Medicare kicks in.

Oh, the GERD, yeah, that's from the copious amounts of ibuprofen...esophageal erosions. Got that taken care of with omeprazole.(my skin is like sandpaper but wth, I'm not puking all the time)

I :heartthrob: you

Always_Believe 01-04-2016 09:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by -Spike- (Post 1191482)
Are you on disability or SSI? I apologize. I am not current on your history. From the sound of it, you sound as if you should qualify for those things. And Ma'am, is there someone in the town that you live in that you can phone and talk to? You have so many great things around you-- your son, your daughter, your degree, your home. You Hang in there! You are so much more than CRPS.

Just got approved for SSDI in July. Medicare kicks in in April.

New town....no one.
(and don't have the degree as this beast has stolen that from me)

-Spike- 01-04-2016 09:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Always_Believe (Post 1191487)
Just got approved for SSDI in July. Medicare kicks in in April.

New town....no one.
(and don't have the degree as this beast has stolen that from me)

I have contacts in that area, since I lived there and worked there. if you need someone to chat with, you let me know. I can help find someone for you within my church body. Some of my professional buddies there owe me a favor or two or ten. Just give the word.

Always_Believe 01-05-2016 12:10 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by -Spike- (Post 1191492)
I have contacts in that area, since I lived there and worked there. if you need someone to chat with, you let me know. I can help find someone for you within my church body. Some of my professional buddies there owe me a favor or two or ten. Just give the word.

So sweet! I'm 2 hours NW of Chicago...almost in WI. I did start a community FB group shortly after I moved here to get to know what is available in the area and they have come up with a few other names of docs for me.

Still...thinking maybe the route of amputation would get some measure of life back for me. There is zero quality of life going from bed to potty palace and back again with reruns of NCIS or Married At First Sight playing in the background. :wink:

-Spike- 01-05-2016 12:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Always_Believe (Post 1191518)
So sweet! I'm 2 hours NW of Chicago...almost in WI. I did start a community FB group shortly after I moved here to get to know what is available in the area and they have come up with a few other names of docs for me.

Still...thinking maybe the route of amputation would get some measure of life back for me. There is zero quality of life going from bed to potty palace and back again with reruns of NCIS or Married At First Sight playing in the background. :wink:

The problem with an amputation is that they can never get to the end of the CRPS. What I mean by that is, CRPS is a neurological disease. It resides in the brain, the spinal cord, and every nerve running through our bodies. Our CRPS diseased brains connect to our CRPS diseased spinal cords, which run down the length of our bodies, which have diseased nerves all along the column, which connect to our CRPS diseased feet, or CRPS diseased arms, or legs. So, that CRPS infected limb would have to be cut off along with the CRPS infected brain, along with all of the CRPS infected nerves. CRPS manifests it's symptoms in different parts of our bodies (the pain, the swelling, etc.) that is if I understand what I've been told correctly. In other words, CRPS doesn't have a cure, not even an amputation will end it.

Always_Believe 01-05-2016 01:01 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by -Spike- (Post 1191520)
The problem with an amputation is that they can never get to the end of the CRPS. What I mean by that is, CRPS is a neurological disease. It resides in the brain, the spinal cord, and every nerve running through our bodies. Our CRPS diseased brains connect to our CRPS diseased spinal cords, which run down the length of our bodies, which have diseased nerves all along them, which connect to our CRPS diseased feet, or CRPS diseased arms, or legs. So, that CRPS infected limb would have to be cut off along with the CRPS infected brain, along with ever CRPS infected nerves. In other words, CRPS doesn't have a cure, not even an amputation will cure it.

True enough. My docs can't even decide if it's CRPS or PN or axonopathy. Bottom line is I have 2 permanently damaged nerves and this ongoing knee thing. While I understand the general basis of CRPS, there are relatively few studies that I can find on amputation in CRPS type 2. My logical thought tells me that while my pain/symptoms align with CRPS, it is a direct result of nerve damage. Removing the nerve that is damaged (misfiring) seems then to be a viable solution. I am ok with functioning at a 4-5. I have very limited function at a 6-7 and am toast at an 8 or higher. I wake at a 3-4. Return from the potty palace a 6 on a good day. I haven't had enough good days lately to remember the 6. I am willing to explore the amputation option simply because I believe it is an option still out there to improve my function, my ability to walk/work/cook/clean/shower

-Spike- 01-05-2016 01:44 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Always_Believe (Post 1191524)
True enough. My docs can't even decide if it's CRPS or PN or axonopathy. Bottom line is I have 2 permanently damaged nerves and this ongoing knee thing. While I understand the general basis of CRPS, there are relatively few studies that I can find on amputation in CRPS type 2. My logical thought tells me that while my pain/symptoms align with CRPS, it is a direct result of nerve damage. Removing the nerve that is damaged (misfiring) seems then to be a viable solution. I am ok with functioning at a 4-5. I have very limited function at a 6-7 and am toast at an 8 or higher. I wake at a 3-4. Return from the potty palace a 6 on a good day. I haven't had enough good days lately to remember the 6. I am willing to explore the amputation option simply because I believe it is an option still out there to improve my function, my ability to walk/work/cook/clean/shower

Ahhhh, so you are not really convinced as to the complete picture of what all you have going on. I so totally get that! My whole pain battle began with Morton's Neuroma which was masking my CRPS beneath it. So, I actually had two separate things going on at the same time in both of my feet. I don't know if you are familiar with Morton's Neuroma or not. It is a matter of a single nerve being crushed by two bones in the foot. They cure the Neuroma by simply removing the nerve from the foot surgically. The only problem with mine was, regardless of the fact that the nerve was removed, the CRPS stayed and has been with me ever since.

So, that leads me to a question. When you say Amputation, do you mean, amputate the nerve and leave the limb? Please educate me. :D

Always_Believe 01-05-2016 02:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by -Spike- (Post 1191528)
Ahhhh, so you are not really convinced as to the complete picture of what all you have going on. I so totally get that! My whole pain battle began with Morton's Neuroma which was masking my CRPS beneath it. So, I actually had two separate things going on at the same time in both of my feet. I don't know if you are familiar with Morton's Neuroma or not. It is a matter of a single nerve being crushed by two bones in the foot. They cure the Neuroma by simply removing the nerve from the foot surgically. The only problem with mine was, regardless of the fact that the nerve was removed, the CRPS stayed and has been with me ever since.

So, that leads me to a question. When you say Amputation, do you mean, amputate the nerve and leave the limb? Please educate me. :D

The only thing I know for certain is the 1st emg/ncs showed damage to my peroneal nerve; the 2nd showed damage to my peroneal and tibial nerves.

I know that I have the temperature/color changes, swelling, burning cold, shooting knife pain. As well as muscle spasms from my knee down. I've had my PCP term it RSD, my ortho call it "this RSD you speak of", neuro term it CRPS, PM tell me it's not CRPS because I can wear a sock and see peripheral neuropathy listed as a diagnosis at my latest pain clinic.

So do I feel 100% confident it is CRPS, no. Do I feel confident that there is no neurosurgical option, no. I have lost faith in the medical field I previously dedicated my life to. I have had 8 specialists in the past year and I have only gained 3 more diagnoses and 5 more meds that I can't tolerate/did nothing and 1 medication I will permanently have to take. Cutting off a leg seems like a (pardon the pun) walk in the park. If removing the nerve would be an option, I would probably opt for that route but I don't believe there is a doctor out there any more that has an interest in patient care and therefore neither above/below knee amputation or nerve excision are going to happen. I fear I may need to move out of the country to find adequate care. I will however, attempt the few leads I have gotten first.

Tomorrow I am heading to the basement to go through the boxes still left unpacked from Aug 2014 to sell/donate/re-pack. I will probably try to get my son to put the recumbent bike together when he comes this weekend so I can theraputize myself - regardless of whether or not I can get up off the floor afterwards.

-Spike- 01-05-2016 06:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Always_Believe (Post 1191529)
The only thing I know for certain is the 1st emg/ncs showed damage to my peroneal nerve; the 2nd showed damage to my peroneal and tibial nerves.

I know that I have the temperature/color changes, swelling, burning cold, shooting knife pain. As well as muscle spasms from my knee down. I've had my PCP term it RSD, my ortho call it "this RSD you speak of", neuro term it CRPS, PM tell me it's not CRPS because I can wear a sock and see peripheral neuropathy listed as a diagnosis at my latest pain clinic.

So do I feel 100% confident it is CRPS, no. Do I feel confident that there is no neurosurgical option, no. I have lost faith in the medical field I previously dedicated my life to. I have had 8 specialists in the past year and I have only gained 3 more diagnoses and 5 more meds that I can't tolerate/did nothing and 1 medication I will permanently have to take. Cutting off a leg seems like a (pardon the pun) walk in the park. If removing the nerve would be an option, I would probably opt for that route but I don't believe there is a doctor out there any more that has an interest in patient care and therefore neither above/below knee amputation or nerve excision are going to happen. I fear I may need to move out of the country to find adequate care. I will however, attempt the few leads I have gotten first.

Tomorrow I am heading to the basement to go through the boxes still left unpacked from Aug 2014 to sell/donate/re-pack. I will probably try to get my son to put the recumbent bike together when he comes this weekend so I can theraputize myself - regardless of whether or not I can get up off the floor afterwards.

Wow, that must be so hard to not be able to take any meds, due to a lack of tolerance. I can definitely relate to that to a degree. There is a whole list of medications that helped me, yet the side effects were so harsh that I simply could not take them. It took me a very long time to sort through all of the meds that we tried in order to find the few that I can take without too many harsh side effects.

Question: Have you ever tried Voltaren Gel? It is a topical gel and is very good at reducing pain for me. There is also a Ketamine gel mix that works wonders for many people too. Maybe those would work, since they are not ingested.

Always_Believe 01-05-2016 09:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by -Spike- (Post 1191536)
Wow, that must be so hard to not be able to take any meds, due to a lack of tolerance. I can definitely relate to that to a degree. There is a whole list of medications that helped me, yet the side effects were so harsh that I simply could not take them. It took me a very long time to sort through all of the meds that we tried in order to find the few that I can take without too many harsh side effects.

Question: Have you ever tried Voltaren Gel? It is a topical gel and is very good at reducing pain for me. There is also a Ketamine gel mix that works wonders for many people too. Maybe those would work, since they are not ingested.

Most of the meds are due to ineffectiveness. I've asked my docs for compounding creams, muscle relaxers, anything. Gaba didn't work & caused 40 pound weight gain; Lyrica is not covered; meloxicam caused mouth sores; amitriptyline/cymbalta not effective; ibuprofen ate my esophagus. What has worked even on a moderate level, they won't prescribe. I've had arthroscopy, steroid injections (knee), euflexxa injections (knee). I don't really want to do the LSB's more because I have a problem with how that was all handled but I am willing to try anything. Just can't get any docs to play along with the insurance.

-Spike- 01-05-2016 10:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Always_Believe (Post 1191544)
Most of the meds are due to ineffectiveness. I've asked my docs for compounding creams, muscle relaxers, anything. Gaba didn't work & caused 40 pound weight gain; Lyrica is not covered; meloxicam caused mouth sores; amitriptyline/cymbalta not effective; ibuprofen ate my esophagus. What has worked even on a moderate level, they won't prescribe. I've had arthroscopy, steroid injections (knee), euflexxa injections (knee). I don't really want to do the LSB's more because I have a problem with how that was all handled but I am willing to try anything. Just can't get any docs to play along with the insurance.

Errrrrr, Insurance!

Always_Believe 01-05-2016 10:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by -Spike- (Post 1191549)
Errrrrr, Insurance!

At the risk of sounding like a bigger whinner, I'm not sure I am wanting to attempt another medication with "weight gain" as a common side effect. Seeing as this is a weight bearing joint/limb I cannot see another 10 pounds (or more) being a good thing. I gained 18 pounds in 2 weeks on my last gaba run.

Fiery1 01-05-2016 11:12 AM

Are you hoping they customize therapy based on RSD?
 
ARE YOU HOPING that RIC customizes your therapy based specifically on RSD?


Quote:

Originally Posted by Always_Believe (Post 1191364)
As I figure the last session of the pain program through RIC (Rehab Institute of Chicago) has recently completed, I placed a call to see where I am on the wait list and when the next session starts.

Please cross your fingers, say a prayer, throw salt, send good thoughts...whatever you do for luck/miracles/etc. The answer will guide my next steps and the direction I will take for the future.

Thank you



Always_Believe 01-05-2016 02:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fiery1 (Post 1191558)
ARE YOU HOPING that RIC customizes your therapy based specifically on RSD?



To be honest...at this point I have given up on RIC. In my train of thinking, no doctor/company/program that concentrates on pain management allows a patient to be in 6-9 pain 24/7 for 6 months.

Working with insurance to find another PM and most likely another PCP. I'm not looking for miracles or ultra specialization, I'm looking for someone to look at my functional decrease directly related to pain and attempt something more than "here's a new pill, try it for a few months" and when it doesn't work that's all they try. My function has gone from 60% 15 months ago to about 10-15% today.

Willing to go through whatever motions the insurance/doctor requires but I will not accept my healthcare team throwing their hands in the air and walking away when there are still options to try.

Littlepaw 01-05-2016 04:22 PM

There you go! You keep that fighting spirit. :mf_swordfight:

I know it gets tedious looking for a doctor but if the ones you have aren't helping then move on. The degree of function loss should be setting off alarms not apathy. And pain should be treated not accepted if possible. Definitely demand more from your doctors.

It may be worth looking at a rehab outpatient or inpatient program. The admissions people could let you know. It's their job to determine if patients are a good fit for their program. I am really surprised your wait has been so long on the other program you were on the list for. Ugh.

I think checking into the NS at Northwestern is a good idea too. It's just information and the Peripheral Nerve specialists like mine have a different approach and even different diagnostics.

Remember my mantra to 'start low, go slow'. If you start at two minutes on the bike and build to five that's just fine.

I :heartthrob: you too.

Always_Believe 01-05-2016 05:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Littlepaw (Post 1191603)
There you go! You keep that fighting spirit. :mf_swordfight:

I know it gets tedious looking for a doctor but if the ones you have aren't helping then move on. The degree of function loss should be setting off alarms not apathy. And pain should be treated not accepted if possible. Definitely demand more from your doctors.

It may be worth looking at a rehab outpatient or inpatient program. The admissions people could let you know. It's their job to determine if patients are a good fit for their program. I am really surprised your wait has been so long on the other program you were on the list for. Ugh.

I think checking into the NS at Northwestern is a good idea too. It's just information and the Peripheral Nerve specialists like mine have a different approach and even different diagnostics.

Remember my mantra to 'start low, go slow'. If you start at two minutes on the bike and build to five that's just fine.

I :heartthrob: you too.

To be honest, if my daughter wasn't willing/able to help me financially over this hurdle, selling/moving would be my only option and I wouldn't bother wasting time finding new docs.

As luck would (maybe) have it, one of the very local pain clinics I contacted a year ago, is now accepting my insurance and new patients. I spoke with staff there at length this afternoon. The problem (or solution) is that I need a referral from a PCP in their health system (my current PCP is not).

Conversation with my case manager got me to re-examine the role of the PCP with chronic illness. I guess I never pieced it together for myself but reflecting back on my son, it makes absolute sense. I don't care that my PCP doesn't prescribe pain medication in the big picture but, in the small print she is only the referral queen. She has not handled any real issue for me at all. In fact, what she attempted failed miserably (round 3 of gaba...wouldn't listen when I was telling her it wasn't helping, back tracked on what she proposed at the office visits, etc).

I'm angry. I'm angry that my lifelong dream is now not a possibility because of delays in my treatment. I'm angry that I am dependent on someone else for nearly everything now. I'm angry that my daughter has to use some of her trust fund to support me because my function has decreased to the point of not even being able to work as a receptionist. I'm angry that I have not been heard or listened to. I'm angry that I blindly doled out faith/trust only to have that not reciprocated and smashed.

With that anger, I am trying to find strength. I'm trying to think outside the box. I'm holding on for dear life.

Thank you for being here for me :heartthrob:

Littlepaw 01-05-2016 06:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Always_Believe (Post 1191610)


With that anger, I am trying to find strength. I'm trying to think outside the box. I'm holding on for dear life.


Anger can be a great motivator, just don't turn it on yourself. This is not your fault. You could not have 'known better". Try not to 'coulda, shoulda, woulda'. I really beat myself up over healthcare decisions that I felt contributed to my CRPS (mainly choosing the 'wrong' doctors and having complications)...as if that helped me get any better or I could do anything about it. :rolleyes: Keep moving forward and ditch negativity that holds you back or gets toxic. Eyes on the prize, girl!

You are very welcome ;)


All times are GMT -5. The time now is 12:40 PM.

Powered by vBulletin • Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.

vBulletin Optimisation provided by vB Optimise v2.7.1 (Lite) - vBulletin Mods & Addons Copyright © 2024 DragonByte Technologies Ltd.