Coughing Asthma
 

Okay I know I've posted about my asthma.

But I need the research specialist. I'm looking for someting on Coughing
Asthma. I need to go to a new pulmonary doctor.

And I need to figure out how to explain my problems

Donna

Dear Donna,

I have a dumb question.
Why is your Coughting Asthma different from other Asthmas and what makes you think that a good pulmonary would not be able to understand what you are talking about?

Is it anything like what is described in this link?
http://www.webmd.com/asthma/guide/cough-variant-asthma

Have you been seeing a regular mdoc for this in the past?

Sorry for all the questions.
Mari

I looked this up on the link provided and this sounds exactly like what my 6/7 year old has been suffering from for the last 4 years and no one would diagnose him with asthma. They kept telling me to give him cough meds and cold meds and they never worked and being an asthmatic myself I knew better. He would reach a point where he would cough like 10 -15 times a minute and I would wind up taking him to ER clinic and they would give him a treatment and off we would go. They said there was no wheezing or major shortness of breath but the coughing would get so bad he would vomit and couldn't catch his breath. Finally Easter before last a new doctor at the ER clinic asked "why hasn't this child been diagnosed with asthma" she wrote me a scrip for a nebulizer and some prednisone and we have been treating him ever since. I got rid of his original pediatrician. I never knew there was such a thing as cough-variant asthma. geez thanks you guys.

I didn't realize when I was diagnosed with asthma that there was a cough variant either. I really thought the wheezing I do sometimes, made it asthma.

I've always had a cough too, and at times its really bad. But it will go away usually, or the medicines that my primary used to prescribe would work.
But I'd be on a prescription most of say 6 months. So it bothered her to the extent she finally sent me to a asthma/allergy doctor. ANd I also have some allergies. I at first thought maybe my allergies made me have asthma, but they just make my asthma worse, so to make sure my treatment of shots for the allergies is very much current is very important. Is all that I can do.

I also know that at times I have to wait for my treatments, because of the degree my asthma is out of control. But I just recently saw a thing that said, there was a cough variant, and realized there was a good chance this is what I have. It then made much more sense to me.

I also have seen a pulmonary doctor, but he treated me like I was a idiot and then also through his nurse scheduled test, but they came out normal and he then didn't want me to come back for the answers or to get more answers.
So I did go back, but he acted like I was crazy to go back. So I just don't feel good going back to him. So my asthma/allergy doctor sent me to a heart specialist and all those test are normal, but she really checked me good.
I had some other issues that made me be checked really strongly for other things, and then to a reflux doctor. I have some reflux things, and I'm being treated, but its still the breathless, and out of control asthma. And its not being helped to the degree it needs by the asthma meds.

I've been on as many meds as my asthma doctor feels he can prescribe, I'm
on advair HFA the inhaler, singulair and claritin, and benedryl for the help for my allergy shots, plus a nose spray right now. Plus my stuff for the Ulceratus
colitis and my neuro things. But my asthma/allergy doctor says I need to
go back to the pulmonary doctor, and I refuse to see the one I have seen,
and I don't know if the partners will see me, but I'm going to find out.

And I just wondered what I need to ask that I didn't ask before.
I don't have a nebulizer, but I have a spacer.

This is long, but I am lost as how to help myself, I use the xopenox 4 times or more a day right now, and have for a long time.

And I'm really lost as how to help myself. I have no idea how to help me.
Anyone know what I can do, I drink hot tea, hot chocolate, water, and
diet coke. Because I need something to drink to keep from choking and
coughing all the time.

I drink the first three the most. I am trying to eat chicken soup once a day,
but I don't have any right now.

Donna

Hi, Christina,

I don't know why drs don't simply look stuff up like they do on the television shows. :rolleyes:

Thank goodness that your son is getting proper care now.

Mari

Hi, Donna,

I am concerned after reading yours and Christina's posts about drs who don't get it. Actually it is rather frightening.

Yes, you need a new doctor and soon.

Oh dear. Please see someone other than that guy. He doesn't know what else to do for you -- and I'm not sure that he is motivated anyway.
Can you find someone outside that partnership?


Ask for a nebulizer.

Your post is sad. We are not supposed to have to figure how to fix things. We find the drs, go to the drs, explain things to them, and they fix us.

Do you have a take out restaurant that makes chicken soup? I used to have one but they closed. I miss them.

Write down your history and symptoms on one page and bring two copies to the appointment -- one for you and one for the pdoc.

You will get a dr who understands and can offer help. Keep looking.

Mari

Donna
 

I don't know what to say beyond what Mari already did, but i still wanted to offer you a :hug:

oh... one thing:

cough, and spasming, in general: lavender infusion. you can get some lavender flowers (commestible - from health food store, pharmacy, etc - + ask to be sure), 3 ounces water, one teaspoon dried lavender flowers. boil the water. steep the lavender loose for a good 7 minutes. drain*. it is aromatic but slightly bitter. you can add honey if you want, but i don't, and i don't personally suggest it.

*don't use the tea-trap metal contraptions (for convenience i steep it in a mini-drainer sitting in a demi-tasse so i can just lift it out)

with a regular cough, it can have a small effect immediately, but a single dose is often not noticeable. for my empty cough that persists for instance beyond allergen exposure and becomes chronic, the lavender infusion takes a good week to really knock it down well. it must be taken twice daily, morning and evening.

also i will add what you probably already know, and may even be "dieted off" already due to the GI issues.

1. MILK and DAIRY products thicken mucous secretions in the respiratory tract. Don't use milk in your hot bevs, and check the hot chocolate package for dairy content (tho that shouldn't affect you as much - just don't add milk).

2. Also garlic and other gastric irritants (anything spicy) do the same... and cause coughing. Again you have probably been dieted off any such offenders due to general GI issues. I was amazed when i found out about the garlic - that in particular permeates tissues throughout the body incredibly.

Have you talked to either the GI or pulm specialist regarding the effect of cocoa ingestion on the respiratory apparatus?

Is your cough worse after eating?

btw i don't have asthma but have upper-respiratory allergies which in general are seasonal or no big deal, excepting acute exposure.

well... ehh ... another :hug: won't hurt! :D

~ waves ~ from across the ocean

Hi Ladies
 

My sis has allergies. She told me to pass this on to you in case it helps:

http://www.doctorndtv.com/news/detailnews.asp?id=2869

Thanks to you both. I had seen a article today about the Iron deficiency.

But I've had so many blood test for the iron deficiency that say I'm not.

But I'm wondering if maybe I should just take a Iron supplement anyway.

And I really am going to work on the Pulmonary Doctor after christmas.

Its been a rough day, and its not over. We are having christmas tomorrow,
here at my house.

But in some ways that will help my asthma. My husband is cleaning the living room floors today with a floor cleaner, and then hopefully will get to the dining room and kitchen floors. I just have no breathing ability to do that.

And I'm tired of hearing how much I'm no help because I'm not helping with
that. But I can't breath if I try. And I did clean the table pretty much off,
but then I almost lost something he left there that was important.

But was having trouble breathing, and tried to explain to him as soon as I could catch my breath I'd start looking for it. He got mad because I walked
into the bedroom to look in one pyle because it was to small to be there.

I was just trying to breath away from the prroblem. And I did find it after
I could breath, he just doesn't get it.

Donna

Dear Donna,

I'm so sorry your husband is so unsupportive of your condition, and unappreciative of your efforts. I wonder what he does think. Have you talked about it - what does he say? (so far, he is making me mad ;))

That is horrid about the can't breathe being constant like that. I read in your checkin that this christmas party is em, last minute, like just what you need. (another reason when i read this post, i was already not well disposed towards your DH i confess).

Mari, that is very interesting. I wonder what the mechanism is behind that... some overreaction due to the blood having insufficient hemoglobin to take in the needed oxygen i guess...

Like Donna, I am not anemic, in fact when i was taking a multivitamin & mineral supplement ONLY 2-3 times a week, and then came off for a week before tests, i came out high on iron. that in itself is not good. I forget what it causes sorry duh.

Donna, don't take iron sups, or sups with iron, if your blood tests show your rbc, hemoglobin and iron level are ok.

((( Donna )))

and hey. when you need to. BREATHE and do NOTHING BUT BREATHE. if someone intrudes... don't engage them. continue to do your thing. continue to breathe without talking or trying to at all, regardless if there are five chimpanzees pulling at your hair :D :D :D :eek: (btw i wasn't trying to call your family chimps, that was just a scene that came to mind literally with a bunch of Bonzo's eeep eeeping around you :D :)

Breathe, breathe in the air...

~ waves ~

Personally I like the thought of the chimpanzee.

I don't try to talk to him about it. He doesn't listen. Its kind of like the fact that all I ever hear is that if I loss weight it would go away.

I know better than that too.

Donna

Hi, Donna,

I only posted the info about the iron on the off off off chance that your drs had not done blood work.
The fact that they did not/do not recognize your issue made me concerned.
Now I feel stupid.

Don't take iron if you don't need it. It's not good to have extra in our body.

Mari

Dear Mari
 

Mari,

The info you posted is INFORMATIVE (by definition, lol), USEFUL and THOUGHTFUL. You have exposed the possibility of the link between iron deficiency and chronic cough. This is a significant piece of information. Maybe Donna and I aren't anemic but someone else reading the thread might be...

I hope realizing these things you don't feel so stupid.

I wish now i had made a note of appreciation for posting it before, because I did find the iron connection interesting. But i just answered off the cuff in a very myopic way, as to whether it applied to me or Donna.

So... a bit late but... thank you Mari.

~ waves ~

Mari

Honestly I appreciated the link, because I couldn't understand why they kept asking me if I was anemic. I had the test more than once. So it didn't make sense why they kept asking me till I read it in a local paper. Even then
I was glad you linked it. Because I know that we aren't the only ones
that read it on here.

Many that don't post read what is linked. I at times read things that are linked but don't post.

SO thanks, it wasn't something to fill a idiot about.

Donna

Thought I'd let everyone that has taken the time to post know that
I put a call into my asthma/allergist today. To request a prescription
call in of presidone. And to also request that he go ahead if possible
and see if they can get me in to one of the partners of my pulmonary
doctors.

I have heard good things of one or both of the partners. So I'm willing
to give them a try. I'm just so miserable I need help.

I had a really bad asthma day yesterday, and today is really going downhill fast so I thought I better put a call in. So that maybe tomorrow could be better.

DOn't have a answer yet, because I just got the call in right before they go to lunch. But better than after lunch.

Donna

Donna,
The prednisone should help.
Making the call is great. I'm betting that the new pulmonary can help you.
M.

Will get the presidone tomorrow. I couldn't really start it till the morning,
because of the time I could get it tonight. So its just as good.

The asthma/allergist office has to call the office to get me a appointment
so I'm still waiting. But at least it should happen.

Donna

Thank you so much guys for this thread
I had a bad cold and bronchitis recently but the meds I took cleared me up
But yet this bad cough hangs on
and it does not feel like the cold or like its in my chest
it always feels like my throat is irritated

And suprise but a month or so before my cold I was diagnosed me as anemic
and I do remember that even the months before it I was developing a cough that I thought was from my recent thyroid surgery. But the doc did not think
so and the pulmonary doc did not either.
It was the gyn and the gastro that caught the anemia.

So this post is a huge help to me!
I have a doc appt next week and will be taking this post with me.

I started iron a couple of weeks ago but have not been consistent with it.
After reading this I got the iron and docs instructions out and restarted a few days back. Cough is slightly better and I will watch over next week until doc appt.

Thanks again!!!!!!!

Dear Shelley,
Thanks for chiming in here.
I hope that the iron helps. :Good-Post:

Mari

Dear Donna,
You have been suffering so with this...I am sorry.
I am hoping that the prednisone will help you in the morning...
my brother in law has been coughing for the past 6 months...he looked pretty pale over christmas....interesting about the anemia factor....
I hope you are able to sleep at night...and wish your other half were more supportive to you.
((((HUGS))))
bizi

Thanks Bizi

Nope I am not sleeping hardly at night. But that in a way is okay. I'm sleeping through the day for a couple of hours at a time, and about 2 or 3 times a day. So its making up for the fact that I only get to sleep about the same way through the night. I also tried to chime in on my husbands conversation to ask that we let our heat go higher last night. He just isn't getting it. Someone that he talks to nightly was on the phone for maybe 4 hours yesterday, kept hearing me coughing. Made the comment someone sounded bad I told them why. And then commented it would help if our heat could go up some.
I got the following response, If I wanted to get a second job to pay the
higher heating bill then it could go higher. I just wanted to cry. He just doesn't understand and just wait till the day he has a cold and I see him
turn the heat up I'm going to turn it back down. And say sorry if it can't
go up to help me live through asthma all the time, then you better get
through your cold by yourself.

Even though honestly he makes probably 3 to 4 times a week as much as
I do. But he just mad me mad. I got my presidone, and am waiting to see
if they can get me a pulmonary appointment.

Donna

Mari, by the way see Shelley needed that post
 

Mari,

See that post sure was needed. ANd I'm so glad that it can help you Shelley.

And Mari I don't remember if I ever answered your question about why the
pulmonary doctor hasn't been able to understand things.

But its mainly this pulmonary doctor, he wasn't willing to listen to me. And then when I was in his office he acted like I didn't have out of control asthma, and that I was a idiot to want to feel better. So I just didn't feel it was important enough with the other sick patients.

I always saw patients with oxygen and other things there. And felt so bad taking their time. I usually got to see him in a remission type time. I would
call when I was really bad, but couldn't get in for a while.

Donna

Donna,
This is sad. He could more invested in your feeling better.

For the men I've know, b*tching about money has little to do with money. It is usually because they are worried about something else or feeling threatened by something. Maybe he wants you to miraculously get better without his having to worry about you.

I had a friend with pulmonary issues that got more and more severe EVEN THOUGH SHE WAS SEEING PULMONARIES. Sometimes drs and nurses make me angry.
I hope that you find good treatment soon.

Mari

Mari

Had to post I asked a different question tonight, I have asked about this before but never really gotten a answer. And it really wont solve the whole
problem but it would help a lot.

I asked about a electric heater for just parts of the house. That I'm
mainly in. But I asked how much it would raise the electric bill a month.
Knowing we have gas heat.

He said, maybe 20 to 30 dollars a month. So I had asked if I could buy
a electric heater, if he would help me find the right kind. He said, I didn't
have to buy one we have some.

So looks like I can get one after all.

Donna

Dear Donna
 

Donna :hug:

I hope hubby will be cooperative about getting the heaters out! And that they help you... at least your home environment will be more comfortable.

And i really wish for you to find a pulmonary doctor who will care, listen to you, and respond to you... down to the meds and any emergency call.

my goodness why does it have to be SO difficult. i'm sorry. :( good luck seeing one of the partners that i think you said you liked, if i got that right.

~ waves ~ from across the ocean

Am glad that you were able to get the electric heater...hopefully you will feel more comfortable using these.
It still makes me mad that he is not more supportive of you....:mad:

hugs today for you sweetie...
((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))
bizi:hug:

Thank Bizi, Waves and Mari.

I needed all the warm fuzzes and the hugs. I probably spoke to soon.
I can't even ask for the favor of getting out the heaters now I don't
think but will have to think on it. I had a awful day. Even when I thought he was being supportive, he had to throw in his biggest complaint. He just thinks I can get out and exercise. And lose all my extra weight and then I wont have any health problems. And he wont have to worry about the wife bringing down his health insurance. I still don't get how he thinks I bring down his health insurance. We aren't connected, if I lose mine by maxing out of the life time. He still has his, and so does Derrick, till they do.

And till the company he works for decided to double the amount this year I was probably coming very close to doing just that. Other than just now
I figured it out. He plans to quit working for the union some day soon. And
do something else, and I'm not supposed to be uninsurable. Well when
I originally lost my diagnosis of seizure (epilepsy) that became less of a problem, my biggest problem now and he doesn't realize this is my asthma.

And I wouldn't dare tell him that now. But he informed me that before I would bring the family down in financial ruin he would divorce me first.
Gosh I just told him to go right ahead. As if its the first time he has threatened to divorce me in our 261/2 year marriage. Its not the 10th or 20th either. Not a clue how many I don't really care. Its always been something. We got married with someone not happy about it.

And its stayed that way, now its just him. Originally it was his mother.

My day, the big mess is next, this is just small potatoes.

Donna's Day
 

My night and day started with not much fun. I was up every few hours, thanks to the pain and bruising in my left side. That was okay at 3:30
when I went to the bathroom, and took my emergency breather.

Then at 6:30 I awake to a stabbing pain, it moved from the side to my
left front, right under the breast. Couldn't move much, and breathing
was a crying spell. So I thought it was not going to get better. SO
I got dressed and took myself to ER. Decided I needed some help.

I then got back and found out I was to get a x-ray, blood work and some
pain meds, and a breathing treatment. He heard wheezing, yep I knew
that but the coughing was the worst. But it wasn't possible with the
Pain. Anyway I got the pain meds, the other stuff, all the sudden needed
a urine -catherater. So then I got back to my room, was feeling good thanks to pain meds.

Forgot as the pain meds were to be strong, was told if no one there, I would
have to have a ride. Ugh, didn't want to make that call. So asked if she
would. It was easier to get yelled at after it was over. Also knew he didn't
have the nerve to tell her no.

So then for some reason a ct scan was ordered too. Hmmm, I thought, why we are looking for kidney stones. And then they had said, a hour and
it would be all back, and home with hubby. Had even told him a hour.

Well it was 21/2 hours after he arrived about 30 to 45 minutes late, thinking okay they will be late, she will be ready. He was not mad at least.

Good mood, told Derrick he could have slept a extra 30 minutes at least.

They went to waiting room to watch tv, I told hubby to it was going to be probably at least a hour, the labs were taking a while. Not sure why it should have been back all ready.

But the diagnosis finally was, kidney stones, but not the pain, but will be one day. Going into pneumonia, and the coughing and stuff is rib cage pain probably from coughing. No ribs them self effected.

And that it was they were sending me home, but that if not better to come back. And it was really borderline to send me with the asthma.

I would probably have fought, but my mom's party at her house is tomorrow, night and I already know the meds he prescribed wont work till at least Sunday for sure. And unless they did IV really really strong I was stuck till
Sunday or Monday. ANd I didn't want him to deside to cancel on my mom.

Derrick didn't deserve that or the others.

Donna

I am reading this tonight and am so very sorry that your husband is doing this to you....
have you ever gone to marriage counseling?
do you have a therapist to help you cope?
what are they going to do about the kidney stones?
I wish I was there to help you...sounds like you could use some help.
Marriage should not be like this....
(((((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))))))
bizi

Dear Donna,
You had a difficult day.
Are you saying that you refused opportunity for care and treatment because of a get together w/ your mom coming up this weekend? I wasn't sure I read that.

Since you have medical insurance you might be able to get a pulmonary or other dr to refer you to physical therapy or whatever other words they use to help you work out under supervision -- like a hospital gym-type situation.
My friend with pulmonary problems was able to do Tai Chi. And she benefitted from it. An expert would know other forms of exercise that would work for you. I bring up exercise because we remind each other of this on the board. It helps with mood and with the other stuff going on in the body -- balance, flexibility, core strength, .... it connects the mind and body on an energetic level . . .

Maybe you will meet a good pulmonary doc in the ER. Did you see one this time?

Are you on meds that can cause kidney stones? Is that why they got you the ct?

You don't have to answer these questions, by the way. They are my way of chatting.

Your husband's threats to break up sound cruel. It's a type of abuse. I hope that you are seeing a counselor, or at least going to a group therapy situation (that might be cheaper).

I've already suggested that his focus on financial issues could reveal a strong underlying insecurity about something else. Money is almost never money but rather a stand in for something deeper. Not that I am an expert or anything.
I guess my point is to remember that his "stuff" is not about you. You already know that but I am reminding you in case it helps to hear it from someone else again.

In December 1995 I came down with walking pneumonia. My mother got me a yoga tape and did it with me. (There was no use explaining to her that I had walking pneumonia and difficulty doing the breathing exercises. She does not listen.)
Anyway, that was the start of my travels through yoga and my interest in searching out some Eastern traditions of health and wellness.
If you have Eastern opportunities near you, you might find them helpful.


M.

Mari

No I did not turn down being admitted to the hospital. If he had
chosen to admit me I would have been right then and there. The
kidney stones, are what I would call dormant right now. They
are not moving at present, so they are no danger to me. That
is the reason I believe they did the CT scan, the xray I couldn't
hold my breath the way it was needed. So they chose to double
check.

I am giving the antibiotics today to work. They don't seem to
be doing much, but I've just had two doses. I realize its going
to be this afternoon before I know for sure. And my plan is
to go back to ER on the way home if necessary.

I'm doing everything I can for my asthma and the pneumonia.
I just have to wait a little more patiently. I will only be a hour
away from the hospital I was at yesterday if I decide I need to
get back. From home its 30 or 35 minutes anyway.

So its 11/2 hours or so to my moms. So I'm not going that far.
I'm doing this as much for Derrick and my mom. As anything.

I wont put myself into lots of danger and I am watching my
wheezing. If necessary I'll go to the local hospital there.

By the way, I have Physical therapy once a week right now
for my vestibular issues, balance is big right now. And were
working back to the machine that I need to get back on.
And she has me using one of their bikes right now.

And I'm going to a physical therapist 2 a week right now for
my neck and shoulder, but the shoulder should be about over,
but I have a appointment to discuss all this with my primary
on Wednesday January 2nd, and plan to ask her to have the
neck continued.
And for a referal to a different Pulmonary doctor. She might
be able to either get me into the more appropriate for me. Or
one in Indianapolis, and I'll specifically ask a friend to take me.

I now understand why the asthma/allergy doctor is concerned
about the drive. I will not ask my husband to lose a day of
pay to do that. But then I can ask for pulmonary rehabilation
at St Elizabeth which is were I'll be admitted if I end up back
there. Which is why I'll go there. Haven't seen a pulmonary
again yet.

Donna

Donna

Dear Donna,

It sure sounds like the ER did a lot of checking around for you.

You are doing a great job of keeping up with physical therapy and the like.
I need to inspire myself to do more exercise.

I hope that the party tonight goes well, esp for Derrick.

Mari

Mari and Everyone
 

The party went great for all. But I had a miserable time. Only because I not only felt awful, sounded awful. But had no clue what the heck I was doing half the time. I swear I've never been so out of the fish bowl so to speak.

I had no clue who I was talking to half the time, or what I was saying, it just came out wrong. Thankfully most of the time, people just assumed I was mixing my words up.

My granddaughter who is 7 Deana, was sick she looked worse than me is all I can say. Had no clue she was sick. But she has medicine now. And thanks to her and her mom I made a trip back to ER last night when we returned home.

Her mom drove my car. And bless their souls. We got there about 10:45pm would have been out and back on the road by 12:00 if it hadn't been for a chest emergency and something else that came in while we were being gotten ready to take back. Of course those took first shot. Which neither
of us would not want.

So that would have been say 12:15, not the usual for our other ER 4 or 5 hours. But I was having so much trouble they weren't sure if they were
going to release me, give me more treatments then decide or what.

The Intern like that was handling our cases had her finished, and they were starved, but didn't want to leave till they at least knew if I was staying or leaving. So they waited till 1:30 with me till he came in. Heard the wheezing and coughing, as he thought he was releasing me. Decided he needed a second opinion after a lengthy conversation of maybe 15minutes
about my whole life history of this cough, crouph, bronchitus and asthma.

So the ER attending comes in talks a few minutes, tells me they have decided that they will do a load of steroids, magnesium, another breathing
treatment or 2. I believe the respirtory therapist got to busy to return to see about a third, which was okay we didn't need to wait another 30 minutes.

Anyway, I said any idea how long before you know if I'm leaving or your admitting, he said, its still a call after we will see how you are. But it will
be a while. By now I've learned that is at least one hour. So I told
Sabrina, to hand me my purse, got out the $8.00 I had left told her to
go get Deana's prescription, and go to Steak and Shake and get them
something with that money.

I already knew they had no money, she lives on SSI, and we neither one
thought to ask Devin to loan me a $20 dollar bill. I had given my last
one to my husband, thinking on the way to kokomo I would get him to stop
in our little town and I'd walk in and get a pop for all of us and case a small
amount of extra money.

He decided he didn't want to do that, he wanted to get my $20.00 of gas
on the way home from Kokomo. So my chance for extra money was gone.

And he said something that made me mad on my getting ready to go get them. We had taken my grandson, who is 6 to the party, and he made the statement that since the gameboy that his mother insisted on him taking, was missing and it was left in the car. He would never take him again.

It just made me so mad, on my way out the door, I made the statement,
that I take Ethan all the time, but I never take him in such a hurry I don't
allow them to find his bookbag that it goes in. And I don't make them rush
him when they have already said he isn't going.

To top it off, the reason they weren't going pretty much was his mom had
two teeth pulled I'm guessing yesterday because she didn't have $1000.00
dollars to get them fixed.

She has no insurance, and they aren't married. And with Danny's bills from
his hospital stay she wouldn't have asked for his help this time.

He said, I told her next time to ask me if she needs the money I'll find a way to help. I said to him, her own parents refuse to provide help.

And one of them owes her a car for her graduation, look how many he has promised and taken away and given to her sister. Now he has even bought her sister a house, by puttng the down payment down.

I don't think she is going to ask for help when he isn't willing to keep promises made on small things that are owed. And besides she has asked for help on things and he wanted so much interest, she came over here and requested a loan with a better interest rate, and you loaned it for free.

So what does that tell you. Her mother and step dad help them, but they might not have had that much money to loan right then.

I reminded him that I've even offered to pay for their wedding when they
set the date. In a place that people can attend, because her dad wont unless Danny converts to catholic and they marry in a catholic church.
And he said, something about that, And I said, I don't care where they
get married I just want to be there, and see them have a nice wedding.

There first and I'm pretty sure last. They have been together for 8 years I believe. She is a lot of the reason my son has grown up to the man he is.

And I don't mind admitting that she is his better half. He does too.

But my husband thinks he has done this work, Heehee, till they don't do things the way he thinks they should. Then its someone elses fault.

Which of course is normal. So life is normal at my house.

And you think I just wrote a book here, I came home, cant sleep so I wrote 20 pages in my notebook, because I couldn't find what I needed at the hospital and continued about life in general. And did that feel good, YEp.


Thanks for listening. You guys are the best therapist I have so far.
But just as soon as I have some free time, I plan on finding one.

I just don't have the time right now. I have to find out what is wrong
with me and fix it. I could care less if I fix my marriage, its not broke
by me. And its not my fault.


He is the one with the problems. And if he wants it to work, he can figure out what his problem is. He apologized gave me a big hug. And I am
not even sure what it was for. Other than he told me he didnt' get any sleep till I came home last night. So its definately he is scared and he takes
his scared out on the one thing that doesn't go away.

Me, see this first started on the divorce thing, because his mother had
disowned him for marrying me. Then a few years later, he wanted to
know why she was taking my side one our fight about how to raise the
kids.


I just kind of stick to things and don't go away. But if he doesn't want
me around he knows were the door is. And I know how to go out it.
But he has another thought coming if he thinks Derrick is staying with
him. Derrick has made it clear.

Donna

Dear Donna,
I am making a proclamation that no more ER trips are necessary. ;) You and everybody in your field of influence will have good healthy days and nights from now on.

I'm on my way to bed at last so my note is short. I hope that that is all right.

I hope that the grandbabbies are ok.


This is stupid. The only requirement the Catholic church has is that the other person must have been baptized somewhere sometime in his life -- they don't both have to be Catholic to be married in the Catholic church -- this rule was changed many many years ago.
Well, they have a few other rules, like having to take a little marriage class, depending on the priest and such.

Looking forward to a wedding is good and hopeful.


Wow, his Mom was tough on him --- and on you.

Be ok.

M.

Good Lord Donna, so much has happened since I was here last. Did you ever get a nebulizer? My son's inhaler does very little for him so we rarely use it. How is the prednisone working? Pulmicort with the Albuterol in the nebulizer is what we use when he is really bad and the cough just won't go away.

I am sorry about your husband. He may feel helpless about your condition and you know men like to feel in control so if he feels threatened by the lack of it he may not know how to express it except in anger. Some counseling may do you both good.

I hope that 2008 is better for you than 2007.

Donna - How are you feeling today?

Just checking on you and thinking of you.:)

Post back when you can.

I hope you are feeling better.

Nikko:hug::hug::hug::hug::hug: