welcome purplefoot!
 

Hi purplefoot,
Just wanted to say hello and welcome you to the bipolar forums.
Feel free to use this as your thread or start one for yourself.
I just returned from a vacation for the past 2 weeks, so I am trying to get caught up reading threads etc.
bizi:welcome_sign:

Thank you Bizi, and everyone else who has already welcomed me, for the warm welcoming. Welcome back home. I hope your trip to Indiana went well and was very enjoyable. Also, thank you so much for all your hard work putting so much information together on some of the sticky pages.

Welcome Alaina

Please keep telling us what we can do to help you.

donna :grouphug::hug:

you can post whatever is on your mind even if it is not directly related to bipolar. let us get to know you!
bobby

An introduction
 

Hi everyone, and thank you all for being so warm and welcoming. In case you haven't noticed, my name is Alaina and I was diagnosed as bipolar 2 during a stay in the hospital a year and a half ago, although I didn't find out about the diagnosis until my therapist got ahold of my psychiatrist's notes just a few months ago. I was never told that the diagnosis was changed from major depression which is what my initial psychologist tested me to be. Now that I am getting the proper treatment, I am doing much better. I still have my ups and downs, but don't we all.

I am rather shy and do suffer from social anxiety, so you're likely to notice that I will read more than I post. I do like to give support when I can though.

I found Neurotalk a few years ago while searching for information about CRPS/RSD. The CRPS has not been too exciting to have for me but the members on here have been wonderful and have provided a wealth of information.

I'm registered to take some college classes from home this fall. It will be my 4th attempt at trying for my degree in business administration, but it makes me nervous. The last three attempts have caused too much stress for me to handle and led me into a deep depression with suicidal thoughts and actions. I have brought this up with my therapist but she doesn't seem to be all that concerned about it. Her big concern is trying to get me to socialize more. What are your thoughts.

YOu know your body best.
If you have tried 3 times before then how are you going to approach this different this time so you don't end up in the same bad spot?
perhaps just taking one course at a time?
bizi

Thanks for the advice bizi. I am currently registered for 3 courses and of course my advisor wants me to try 4. I originally told her that I want to take things slower this time and see how I do with 1 or 2 classes and see how I do. Maybe I should go back to my original plan and just try the 2.

II don't think I like your therapist. If you are bipolar II you are already carrying a lot of stress with you besides taking on anything else. If you decide to go back to school can you do it part time so it won't be so stressful? Also a lot of us have social anxiety because we are different and tend to be more sensitive and empathic and self critical . Have you ever thought of joining a support group in your area? That can help you be selective and make friends. what medication are you on? I don't like your psychiatrist either.It is important to know your diagnosis to know what you are up against or to know if it doesn't fit.
bobby
ps i didn't see your post when I was writing mine

Bobby,
Unfortunately I live in a small town where medical care is very limited. I haven't looked into support groups in the area but I would be surprised if there is one. My therapist would have encouraged me to go if there was. I actually like working with my therapist. I mean I am nervous when I talk with her but she is helping. She just doesn't think school is important for me right now so she doesn't really want to encourage me to take many classes. As for my psychiatrist, I don't like him much he is a telemedicine doctor, but he is the only one around within an hours drive of home so choices are very limited. I have tried to switch there is just no one else around that takes Medicare around here.

I forgot to mention my meds.
Depakote 500 mg bid
Cymbalta 120 mg oid
Resperdal 4 mg oid

For CRPS:
Trileptal 300 mg bid
Low dose naltrexone 4mg oid
Terazosin 5 mg oid
Vitamin C 500 mg oid

For general health:
Estradiol 2 mg bid
Cytomel 20 mcg oid

I think taking 1 or 2 classes is reasonable. Can you drop the other classes?
bizi

taking all those medications must slow you up so i too think one or two courses is enough. have you ever considered volunteer work since you seem so helpful and it might help reduce social anxiety while still interacting with people?

I have up until mid September to drop any courses without being charged anything for them.

I'm sure I could volunteer time somewhere. I just always worry about my limitations. I have to keep my foot elevated most of the day or it swells up, turns purple and starts to hurt quite a bit. Maybe I could volunteer for an hour or two a week.

don't put extra stress on yourself
bobby

Have you tried compression hose on the one leg? It really helps my clients who wear them. Yes they are hard to put on but worth it if it provides you more mobility/activity.
bizi

I have a pair of compression stockings but the compression is more than I can handle. It does keep the swelling down but the pain is sky high. Maybe I could try a pair with a lower compression rating. The ones that I have were prescribed by my ortho a couple of years ago and if I remember correctly, they were rather heavy, 30 mm hg, which is about as heavy as they come.

My suggestion with the compression hose would be to even go out and
by some diabetic socks and see if they might help. Ive had lots of
problems with my feet and ankles, and legs. I've worn compression
hose, and socks. I have bought the ones in stores that are just regular
ones that work very well after having prescription ones. I really
like the ones in the regular stores when I want some more control on
my feet or legs.

Now I'm kind of lost, the cymbalta, you have on your list, is it for
pain. I'm just curious. I used to take it for mine. Till I had to go
off because of the price when I didn't have insurance.

I think you should definitely stick to two classes. But I also am wondering
did you say your doing it online or in a classroom.

Donna :hug::grouphug:

Donna,

I am taking the cymbalta as a dual purpose drug both for pain and bipolar depression.

My classes will be online this time. It's the biggest thing that I am doing differently this time. The courses that I will be taking are both writing courses, which I think I do okay with, and I will end up dropping my speech course to try at a different time.

Alaina,

I'm so sorry that you are suffering from CRPS :hug::hug::hug:
I would definitely ask one of your doctors to write a script for stockings with a compression rating that is bearable :hug:

Since you have had a hard time handling the stress of school in the past, especially since the stress triggered suicidal ideation, I would take things slow and drop the third class... Even though I'm inclined to believe that you will do much better now that you are getting the right treatment. Maybe next semester you can take more classes :hug:

Thank you for letting us get to know you better :)
And thank you for the support you have been giving since you joined the forum :hug:

I had talk therapy this morning and made sure to bring up school again with her. She agrees that it's probably a good idea for me to drop that 3rd course. She mentioned that no one knows myself better than I do and that if I believe that I am going to fail at something, I have already set myself up to fail.

I don't like her come back. I would have rathered her to say "You know your body best" and left it at that.
((((HUGS))))
bizi

I think that taking the two classes and doing well will help you build confidence :hug::hug::hug:

Taking two classes that you do lots of writing and a speech class
would honestly have been lots more work if you ask me.

And would the speech class have had to be a in person at least
once or so a week class. Because I'm not sure how a online class
would do a speech class. Just not sure. I am glad you are doing
just two. Ignore her come back, and just say to yourself. I know
my body better than anyone else.

Donna :hug::grouphug:

The speech class would have been online as well. Reading the syllabus I would have been required to record my speeches and prove that they are done in front of 6-7 people for an audience. The recording would then be uploaded to the course site for the rest of the class to review and comment on. I'm not quite ready to do something like that. I get way too nervous in front of even a small group of people.

Right, and this is how I would explain that your not ready for this
kind of class to your therapist. Explaining to her reading the
sylablus showed that this isn't something you can handle yet.

So you needed to drop this one. And either find a different one,
or just take two. So you chose to take two now and look for
three next time. You will have more time to look.

You could also look for things that would be fun to do. Like do
you crochet or knit. Or enjoy cooking, or other things so would
maybe an online class in one of these for just fun be good.
I think you might find something you could do. That wouldn't
cost money through some program too.

Donna :hug::grouphug:

Are you required to take the speech class in order to get your degree?

Yes, the speech class is a required course. Not only that, I am supposed to take it within the first two semesters of attending school, but there are ways around that just by talking with my advisor which I have already done.

Alaina

Good, you know what needs to be done. That is honestly
what counts.


Don't let the person get on your nerves or talk down to you.

Donna :hug::grouphug:

Hi, Alana,

Definitely go with your original plan. It's not up to your therapist or
your advisor to decide what you should do.

You know best what you feel that you can handle successfully.:)


M

I'm glad that you talked to your advisor so that you have more time to take that speech class. A lot of students don't know that they can get that kind of leeway if they reach out and ask for it... you are wise.

I haven't been sleeping too well lately. I am not sure what it is but I mentioned it to my gp today and he didn't want to do anything. Guess I will have to talk with my psychiatrist to see what he has to say.

good sleep hygiene is so important for us.
many of us have sleep problems
I started taking melatonin prolonged release from my pdocs office 3mg and it seemed to help. but started taking zyprexa5mg at night and that puts me out.
ask your pdoc what he/she wants to do.
good luck
((((HUGS))))
bizi

I'm sorry you are not sleeping well :hug::hug::hug:

Do you have a history of insomnia?
Have you tried anything in the past?

It seems like many medical doctors are uncomfortable prescribing certain kinds of meds to patients with psych conditions/are on psych meds, and will leave it up to psych providers if the patients have them.

I hope that you can get in touch with your psychiatrist soon, and he can prescribe something that will work... :hug:

I have always had problems with it taking me 3-4 hours to fall asleep once I go to bed. Lately it has been closer to 5 hours and I am waking up several times throughout the night.

With my pdoc being the only one in the area that takes Medicare, they can't get me in before my appointment next month and they won't write scripts over the phone. Looks like I will just have to wait until next month.

have you tried benadryl? it worked for me for 2 years then puttered out.
what about melatonin?
bizi

I never thought of benadryl. I will have to try that. I bought some melatonin yesterday and tried it last night. It didn't help but I had a lot on my mind too. I will see if it helps me over the next couple of days.

I'm sorry you have to wait so long when you are not getting nearly enough sleep :hug::hug::hug:

Benadryl works really well for my husband.

Melatonin didn't work for me, but some people swear by it. It usually takes a little time to work.

I hope that you can find a little relief from one or both of those things while you wait for you pdoc appointment :hug:

yes plan old generic benadryl is cheap.

It is the "PM" part of tylenol PM
bizi

I used the melatonin again last night and it worked well this time. I finally got a decent night sleep.

That is wonderful!!! I hope you continue to have success with it! :)
Sleep os so important.