What the heck?
 

I just don't get what is wrong with me these days. I am a blunt, curt, too honest, cranky ****** lately. I have zero patience / tolerance for anything that irritates me or that I view as stupid. Lately, just about everything qualifies. It is like permanent PMS and I don't like it.

I can't seem to keep my mouth shut when something annoys me. I also can't seem to limit my displeasure to a single comment. I go on and on. I can't believe myself. I used to be too polite to utter a peep or complain like that. I'm too young to join the grumpy old men.

I really, really tried to not criticize my DH's mashed potatoes at dinner the other night, but I couldn't stop myself. It's like that movie with Jim Carey about the guy who suddenly couldn't lie about anything (I think the name was Liar). I felt like a petulant child whining about how thin they were because he used too much milk. I should have just been grateful he was home to make dinner so that I could fall asleep in my chair! I really am not very fond of myself right now!

I know that things have been overwhelming the last year with my Grandma getting sick and doing the whole hospice thing. I didn't see becoming a raving ****** listed as one of the stages of grieving, though.

I am on an anti-depressant and I am not really feeling depressed - just cranky. What gives? Do they make an anti-****** pill?

Well...actually, I think anger IS a part of grieving.

And depression can manifest itself as anger (I think "anger" is the guy version of "crabby", but I'm not sure)

:hug:Holly:hug:

Give yourself a break......you've been through alot. I remember being mad at the world. It's just a part of grieving. Looking back I can clearly see when I started getting "crabby" and when the feeling lifted. At the time I just felt like ripping the heads off of anyone who got in my way. Especially at work.....complaining customers griping about little stuff.......I just wanted to ask them "is this the worst thing that's ever happened to you???? Well, let me tell you what happened to me!" If course, I never did but I sure felt like it. Some days were better than others. Being women, we also have other "stuff" to deal with at the same time that doesn't make things any easier. :rolleyes: Be kind to yourself and just know that this too will pass. :hug:

I wouldn't be too worried about it if I was just thinking this stuff, but I can't seem to stop it from jumping out of my mouth! Then, I feel awful for saying mean things.

((((((((((Holly))))))))))

I was going to say, increase your AD doseage..:)

Poor DH....give him an extra hug and splain, so he know's it isn't him.

Feel better.:hug:

I hear ya, Holly :(. I get like that pretty often too. I don't even want try to stop myself sometimes. Sheesh, that sounded awful, huh? Hopefully it'll go away on it's own. I'm on an AD too. I can't imagine what I'd be like without it.

I hope you feel better soon :hug:.

Hi Holly. Sorry that you are going through so much. It sometimes can be overwhelming.

I get the foot in mouth disease often too. It feels right when I'm saying it and then after I feel like a louse.

Don't be too hard on yourself. In the mean time I would just apologize to dh. :hug:

I hope your mood improves soon Holly. You went through a lot in a short time. Now, with the change of season, it could all be having an impact. I think lots of people are going through various things because of the shorter days.

I recently had to have my AD changed and hope it helps me. I have gone through bad mood periods myself.

One thing I've heard to lift your mood is to look in the mirror often and smile as big as you can. And laugh out loud as often as you can. This raises your endorphins naturally and can help especially when the days get shorter.

Keep us posted on how you're doing. :hug:

I know how you feel. I keep an inner dialogue going in my head to try to quiet my instinct to speak my mind.

I think there is an anti ***** medication. My psychiatrist put me on one. :)

And no matter how bad those mashed potatoes may have been, you were not at my house when DH was out of town and I wanted to try a nutritious substitute for potatoes.

You are probably aware that cauliflower is a good substitute? Not the way I made it. I must have overcooked the cauliflower. It looked like gray gruel. Of course I tried to serve it to my children.

I will never live it down.

Switch your AD. And never let me in your kitchen. I hope your mood gets better.:hug:

So sorry you're feeling that way, Holly. I think it kind of goes with the territory plus all you've been through. Are you by any chance taking Elavil? When I tried that AD years ago, it completely changed my personality into someone I didn't recognize or like at all!!! Maybe it's time for a change??? :)

((((Holly)))))

Aww, don't be so hard on yourself. I agree with Kitty, with all you've been through, it's just coming out as anger.

Go ahead and let it out. When you catch yourself later, just say you're sorry, you're not yourself, and move on past it. He of all people should understand.

hy is it that when the dh is going on and on about something, we have to coddle him, but if we are, we feel bad about it and have to make up?

:confused:

Do men ever sit and wonder why they are cranky? Or ask all their friends if something is wrong with them? Lol...

Rx: Chicks' night out, out of town, go out on a limb, but don't go out of your mind, get out of the norm for a bit.

Dosage: Monthly

Have you had your blood sugar checked lately? I find that when my blood sugar is out of whack I turn into a raving *****:eek:

hi holly. you're so wise to even recognize that this is happening to you.
i'd run it by your dr. B2Y is right. anxiety and anger can be a sx of depression.
maybe your AD isn't working for you anymore. you might need to try a change.

and, you might be under more stress than you think.
please be gentle with yourself.
i hope this passes soon.

Zanax came to my rescue when I needed the anti ***** pill. We've broke up since then but we're still in touch if needed. :hug:

Thanks everyone!

I am presently on Wellbutrin which was really working for me and I've been on it before. I also take Klonipin (same class of drugs as Zanax) to supplement the Baclofen for spasticity (it also helps with dizziness).

I love whoever said that men would never sit around and ask other men things like this. That was priceless.

I think I need to touch base with the psychologist I was seeing before. She will help me sort this out, I just hate to take the time because I'm short on time as it is. I am trying to practice saying NO to a lot of things that would add stress, fatigue, etc.

I also agree with AMN that I need a chick's night out or something along those lines. I was actually thinking of just going somewhere by myself for awhile (like an island for a year or two!). I guess I will settle for something less complicated like dinner and a movie with a friend.

It does make me feel better that I'm not the only one who has suffered with this issue.