What if you are FEMALE and PN is affecting your Sex Life?
 

There is support and medication for male difficulty, but what about us gals?

Any comments?

I have to wonder.... for females especially...

If you have PN or other autoimmune issues, how your libido is supposed to be?

I am 63, and before I went thru menopause I was pretty frisky and active. Once menopause hit, I sort of lost my former libido!
And you know, I feel pretty calm and clear headed for once in my adult life! How nice not to be driven by sexual thoughts and desires! I have energy for other things!

Who says we HAVE to do certain sexual things, and feel certain things as we age, or when we have a medical problem.

We spend at least 15 yrs with no sexual activity as children and who says we have to have certain levels after menopause or with illness?

I think this can be a very personal, and individual thing.

The drugs some PNers take are very sexually stultifying.

I will say when I was doing major arginine/citrulline supplements, my response was faster, and more youthful. But it did little for libido. Females need some testosterone for libido and this is blunted by pain management drugs and others, like SSRIs.

The problems people with chronic illness experience with sexual functioning are complex. But I think we should not fall prey to the magazines and media which suggest we should be doing something we no longer want to do or can do. It is a similar dilemma to the problems female teens face about body image and diet.

I may be radical, but I don't think we need to be doing at 50 or 60 what we did at 30. Only the books and media are telling us otherwise. I am more productive and settled now at my age than at any previous time in my life. This may be a rare thing to admit now in our modern sophisticated life, but I will suggest it just the same!

Such good thoughts, MrsD...

Over the past five years or so, I have lost some of my libido. I too was fairly 'active' at one time, though I am postmenopausal and do take some medications that can be 'dulling'.

These are things I have accepted and can work around that, but the thing that really bothers me is dryness and tenderness. I believe it may be due to dusautonomia and PN. My husband is extremely sensitive to this situation, but it still does bother me...

Mere

Yohimbe-Plus is an equal opportunist and apparently doesn't discriminate between genders...

Excerpted quotes from a couple's testimonial:

...She began experiencing increased genital sensitivity and the ability to reach and maintain more intense and sustained orgasmic peaks more easily. She was also able to increase the number of orgasms to well over a dozen very intense climaxes without losing the urge or genital sensitivity...

...At nearly age 50, wife and I are more than satisfied with my libido; we make love 3-5 times a week...

...For my wife... It took her almost 1 1/2 hours longer to metabolize the 3x capsule immediate-effect dosage. However, once she did, she also experienced the lightheaded "euphoria" with a curious side-effect. Her face and chest took on the identical "flush" that she normally displays during intense orgasm!...

...During the lovemaking that followed, she experienced highly heightened genital sensitivity and an almost instantaneous intense orgasmic response from the slightest stimulation. Her climaxes were explosive with very short refractory periods and began to proceed in chains. She literally exhausted herself after nearly 2 hours of non-stop floating in and out of one after another orgasm...

...We were both amazed at how easily and how long this orgasmically "sensitive" period lasted and could only attribute it to the Yohimbe plus...

http://www.iherb.com/Irwin-Naturals-...Gels/3166?at=0

I can only vouch for the male side of the story: it works and then, some... even when PN has apparently damaged the nerves connections that control sensitivity and erections!...

And it's cheap enough to give it a try at $14.46 for 120 softgels at Iherb, which represents a 10 weeks supply for a single person taking one a day for maintenance and 3 on the days where sex occurs: it takes about one week to really kick in and I can't wait to read some comments soon about it...

The "dryness" comes with aging. Every woman gets it eventually as estrogen levels fall.

You can try an estrogen vaginal cream in low dose. It typically works locally and won't be absorbed too much if used carefully.

There are lubricants too.

Also mucus membranes everywhere in the body are supported by essential fatty acid intake, so if you are not eating Omega-3 foods with flax oil, your lungs and other membranes will be dried out too. When I started with EFAs a decade ago, my GERD and asthma cleared right up within 3 months! I used to have terrible bronchitis from catching things from patients, and now I don't even get colds! I may get one episode every 4 to 5 yrs now.

One thing that makes "dryness" worse is overuse of soaps, or failure to rinse adequately. Be very careful of this, because it causes burning and inflammation, which can be interpreted as "dryness" too. I think this is the Number ONE cause of female discomfort after menopause! Using a pH baby controlled soap in very small amounts and rinsing carefully can really help IMO.

You know the media is discussing a female Viagra now, and I think this is just the wrong description of the drug that is trying to target female libido. Viagra for men does not increase libido, it increases Nitric Oxide which dilates blood vessels, and enhancing performance. But that is all it does. The female Viagra is an SSRI type drug to work on the BRAIN! I am not liking this topic AT ALL. If you search topical Viagra you can find older studies on females which showed some promise in application of a lotion form before sexual activity. This improves blood flow to the pelvic platform, and enhanced sensitivity. Why it never caught on further, escapes me. :Dunno:

Blood pressure drugs, antidepressants, anti-seizure medications, opiates, all interfere with sexual functioning. Long term opiates depress testosterone in males by suppressing the pituitary-hypothalamic axis. I think this happens in women too.

People vary in how they express themselves sexually. It is a very personal and individual behavior. I think we should strive to not fall into competitive traps by comparing ourselves to others.(or to ourselves when we were younger ;) )

Such a miracle herb concoction...for only $14 !!

The net is full of shills!

One has to be VERY careful reading those glowing testimonials!

Especially with a product that has that warning stamped right on the bottle!

I pretty much said the same thing in post #3 on this thread:

http://neurotalk.psychcentral.com/thread124993.html

"I have often bought products from Iherb that sported glowing recommendations from a large number of users and which did nothing at all for me...

This left me wondering about the quality of these testimonials, that is until I came across this product where the recommendations, if anything, are somewhat understated..."

This Yohime-Plus appears to be the exception to the rule: it works so well that I'm willing to disregard the fact that California thinks one of its components may cause birth defects... which implies it's probably safe for older men no longer seeking to procreate and post menopausal women...

In any case, when I see the FDA approving cancer generating products, such as Aspartame - the head of the FDA then, now works for the maker of Aspartame - I have little respect for, or confidence in any of the regulating bodies...

http://www.naturalmatters.net/articl...e=3424&cat=247

Fifty-one percent of FDA approved drugs have serious risks and could cause adverse reactions that lead to severe or permanent disability or death. The Center for Disease Control, Johns Hopkins University and the New Jersey School of Medicine estimate that 80,000-120,000 Americans are killed by prescription drugs every year.

I read all the testimonials, on that product just now.

I find that the higher rated ones are first in the list, and then they become neutral and at the end they are negative. They are pretty balanced, except for the few in the beginning which sound like shills to me, especially the more "graphic" ones.

Did you contribute a rating, Seagem? Which one is yours?

Also this is a link to Dr. Sahelian's website:
http://www.raysahelian.com/yohimbe.html
He usually has balanced information on most supplements, and in this case he makes his own formula which appears similar to the Irwin product.
He details the side effects carefully, and points out that Yohimbine is a FDA approved drug as well. However, I am not sure the brand, Yocon, is still available, since it had some recalls in the past due to manufacturing errors.

I have never rated any products on Iherb and generally never bother to rate anything, except once in the case of the Capsaicin cream on Epinion...

It makes no difference to me - financially or otherwise - if people decide to use Yohimbe-Plus, or not... but it's so rare to find an herb where you can say: "Yes, it really works!" particularly where successful love making is involved, that I have to recommend it highly, based on the difference it made to my life and that of my wife...

Being an eternal romantic latino type - as opposed to the more reserved anglo type - I am also of the opinion that when a couple no longer "make love" - as opposed to the triter "have sex" - then something is lost in their relationship...

It's natural that the more detailed opinions appear on first page, as they have far more value than the typical comment at the end: "it works, delivery was fast, thanks Iherb"...

I am referring to "types", such as latino and anglo types...

Most people would agree that there are differences between the two "types" and that many latinos and anglos are atypical in any case...

Anyway, I have edited it, so as not to veer away from the subject at hand...

I remember reading about this study. It seems to have just fizzled-out...what a shame.

Mere

Third time is a charm???
 

This is the third time I have typed a response and when I hit submit it goes who knows where? The page goes blank. So I am going to try this short response before I type another 1/2 page response. So here goes....

PN has affected EVERY aspect of my life......
 

I am a 50 year old, post-menopausal woman, with PN and fibromyalgia. I work 270 miles from home (round trip) so I am only home on the weekends. I work 40+ hours during the week with in addition to being on call 24/7. When I get home, my work continues. I do the grocery shopping, pay bills, cook, do laundry, exercise and take care of any other un-done "loose cannon" items. When I hit the bed at night, the only thing I am interested in is sleep. :Zzzz:I do not have the energy nor the desire for sex. Of course, my pain level factors into this as well. Is my husband happy about this? No, certainly not. But I am not happy about the PN / Fibromyalgia either. We have been dealt a crappy hand and it is up to us as to how we play it!! I agree with Mrs. D tho that the media / movies portray women in an unrealistic way, leaving our husbands to wonder why "their wife" doesn't /can't act like the women on TV. That only serves to add fuel to the fire..........:stirthepot: If sex happens to find itself on the agenda for the 3 days that I am home, so be it. If not, even better. If I have to choose between providing for my family (income & benefits) and having sex, well, sex will have to take a backseat. Hope it doesn't get carsick!!:vomit2:lol

Are you hitting "preview" by mistake? Then the post never posts.

You have to hit Submit. It is a common mistake, and many people do it.

If you have continued problems, let me or another moderator know.

Also when you sign in, check the little box "remember me" and the time out feature turns off. People who make long posts can time out and lose the effort as well.

I've often thought the same thing as you mrsD and kpRN. Life does seem a lot simpler without sex muddling everything up. But a bit less interesting too. Count me in the ambivalent column.

I've often wondered why some women, turn off the sex switch (permanently),
after having a baby.
Once the child is born, sex goes out the window- and down the drain.
Obviously, women with many children still engage in sex, but some just
turn it off after the first child, and after menopause it becomes
a distant memory (or possibly a bad dream?)

You know when I started with PN, back when I was about 30 (before my son came along too), I had terrible pain in my feet every day, and severe carpal tunnel in my hands. It never stopped me then to enjoy my libido.

But I was YOUNG then... and I think when we get much older, the energy levels are lower and the "drive" is lower, and etc etc.

I never took drugs for it then, mainly because none of them existed then. No Prozac, no Cymbalta, no tramadol, no Lyrica, no Neurontin etc. I would not even consider opiates back then either. When I finally had my thyroid fixed, most of that acute PN left, only to be replaced after 50 with insulin resistance, and a new form of PN which was mostly burning in type.

So my initial comments are current, and don't really reflect how I lived back when I was still young and frisky.

I like what you say Kp, I am in awe... I don't know how you do it all...

Mere

I would like to have sex more often, but hubby stays up too late.:Zzzz:

Then there is the issue of I having a 2 and 1/2 year old in the house....

I got the high 5 from her yesterday for going potty----She walked into the bathroom, when I was indisposed, and could not reach the door before she opened it... All I could do was roll with it.

She thought it was very exciting for gramma to be going potty on the big potty....After all, we make a big deal of it when SHE goes...high 5s and all.


She went and told grandpa that gramma did a 'good job'.

Within hours, the whole d@mn town knew I was potty trained.....Yes, I AM learning to LOCK the doors now. Pretty soon I won't need Pull Ups....then again...maybe I will!:o

I dunno about private time for sex anymore....

Not to mention, I have the same bedtime as my granddaughter too!

Boy...

I know this is a private matter but it sounds like your autonomic neuropathy has not affected 'things' like it has to me. I am working so hard to get things back to where they once were... I do hope we are successful.

What about early morn before the rest of the house is awake? That has always been my favorite time.:o

Takes me back to my twins applauding my hubbie oh so many years ago, I left the kitchen to my husband shouting "Get these two out of here", they were so proud of daddy and clapping...we had no privacy for so long. When they went off to school I headed home for my first "alone" tub bath" in years.
I do love the quiet mornings!
I found my hard drive...now if I could find my sex drive life would be much less complicated...........

Mere,

I am not that frisky.....a few times a season would keep me happy, but I would oblige a partner who preferred more often....Hubby needs the testosterone, and when he uses it he gets really grumpy and gets a headache, lol...I DO have issues with the dryness and also atrophy....even with an Estrace ring.

I plan on emptying my nest soon!