Happiness VS Contentment
 

I think it's because I've been sick recently, that I feel this way, but I'm not a happy camper. Right now, the only thing that may truely make me happy, is to be younger:D and MS free.

I talk about contentment and most of the time I am, but not at this time, for some reason. Maybe I need to up my prozac? I'm sure that is where my contentment lies. If it weren't for Prozac, I'd be one anxious, depressed, miserable, messed up kid.:eek:

In the last couple of weeks, I wake up in the morning or from my nap, confused and sad....not wanting to get up. If I didn't have to piddle, I probably wouldn't.:p

My life is such a complete bore and yet I hate hobbies and projects. I'm a lazybutt and normally happy to be just that. I'm not lonely, just purposeless..:rolleyes:

Sorry about the pity party. It helps me to get this stuff out there and bounce it off of my friends, to see what bounces back. I'm sure when I'm back to 100% feeling better, this will all go away and I'll be content again....not hap hap happy, but content.:smileypray:

:hug: I wish many good things for you dear sal pal. :hug:

I find many days that I am rudderless and adrift on this strange lake called MS. Too tired to row to the shore, and too upset and turned around to plot my next course, I sometimes find that allowing myself to drift will bring me new vistas.

I hope you feel better soon. :hug:

Ahhh Sal...hugs for you!
What's Pal got to say about this?
I know for me, I get up and piddle and then get back in bed and I don't care who thinks I shouldn't. When I feel better, I get up and shower and figure out what to do next.
I think you need to get the hunks back in there for a quick pickmeup! Anything need hammering? :D

Awe, Sally (((((:hug:)))))...I hope things will look up for you soon!

Sally, I think I know what you mean. I feel the same sometimes. And my physical condition definitely plays a big part of how I feel mentally. When I don't feel "good" everything else is compromised. One day I feel pretty good and stuff doesn't bother me too much and then the next day I feel yucky and everything seems hopeless.

My life is pretty boring, too. At least compared to how it used to be. But.....my idea of excitement and fun has changed so much over the past 10 years that I'm not sure I could enjoy my "pre-MS" life right now. This stupid disease makes me feel much older than I really am. :mad:

I guess I don't have any solutions to offer you....just an understanding shoulder. :hug:

:cool2: :ROTFLMAO::ROTFLMAO::ROTFLMAO::ROTFLMAO:

um...maybe I missed out on sumfin. isnt Sal Pal a nickname for sally? like Sally my friend? or did I lose a bit of memory when I should have retained it?

Im sorry if I called you by someone elses nick sal. :hug:

Pal is her dog, Dej! :p

We do call Sally "Sal Pal".....among other things! :cool:

Lol, ty for pointing out that I put sally in the dog house. poor sal, she takes so much abuse here. :hug:

Sorry you're feeling low, dear...:hug::hug:
I personally think that when I feel down the way you are describing, it's because I am repressing a lot of anger. Anger about being sick, getting old, and just not enjoying life. (oh, and those new wrinkles...ugh;)).
That's when it's great to go to bed, pull my covers up to my chin, and hibernate all day. Sometimes it feels like I'm taking a breather from the everyday humdrum when I do this.

I guess this is the part of MS when we have to really fight through it. Blech!

Just wanted to send you some hugs Sally. :hug: :hug::hug:This winter has been a particularly rough one, and now there is all of the rain. I understand what you are saying about being content most of the time but not really happy. I resent the fact that my spring break is starting and all I want to do is sit, watch tv, read, and sleep. I use to love to travel and while I still love the idea of it, the reality is not so much fun. So I am wishing that I had flown to Austin to see my sister and niece, but at the same time relieved that I am staying home because I am so tired.

Aww Sally :hug:. I hear ya. Purposeless descibes how I feel perfectly. Hopefully things will start looking up for you soon.

SalPal so sorry to hear what you are going thru now.

I feel that depression does more harm to us then some of the other problems.

The dr. just changed my pill to another anti-dep. (Cymbalta) I have been
sleeping from 15 to 20 hrs. a day. Ignoring everything. I hope that things
get better for you (me too). Hang in there. You have always had the right
words for me when I needed it, I will keep you in my prayers.


Jappy :hug:

:circlelove:((((Joyce)))):circlelove:

Hi Sally, your post really resonated with me. There are days - sometimes several at a stretch - where I feel similarly.

I do work, but on those days work just feels like something to get through, and I'm not emotionallly attached or vested to it in any way beyond requiring a paycheck.

This isn't my normal state; when it comes upon me, I'm too apathetic to fear that it's serious depression, especially if it doesn't last long. But I started to question 'what's missing' in my life to cause me to feel this way sometimes at all?? What's going on?

I know you said you don't like projects or hobbies; I have them too (I don't hate them), but I don't seek them out when I'm feeling blue, either. Hobbies and projects are something I gravitate towards when I'm feeling grounded, creative and happy.

I've used the word 'rudderless' in describing myself at times, as well.
As a result of some self analysis - for what it's worth - here's what I started to do, and what actually helped me:

I realized I was ruminating a lot and focusing on myself so much that my internal thoughts were spiraling around endlessly with no resolution or direction. I knew I had to shift focus onto something 'bigger' than me. It's one of the reasons I started volunteering. Volunteering got me into situations where I had to focus on others. I saw people who do so much with what at first seemed to me like so little. I saw how my meager 'offerings' of time impacted others lives in meaningful ways. I came to realize that I had a lot to offer and that those seemingly ordinary connections within our community were vital to my sense of purpose.

I wasn't doing anything heroic or overly strenuous. I've been available to help bag food for starving kids, collect donations for clothing drives, answer phones, and now... to help with preschool swim lessons.

None of these things have become a focus of my life in and of themselves. Volunteering is not my life's purpose or personal mission, but doing my small part has altered my perspective and helped me realize I'm not actually rudderless, boring, invisible or expendable.

So when you're down, it might help you remember that it matters a lot to other people that you choose to wake up in the morning, and then it'll start mattering to you, too.

Thanks for that Becca, my friend. It made my day..http://home.earthlink.net/~sal.pal/s...res/hugger.gif

OK Sally, we both know "THAT" ain't going to happen. :wink:You've done an excellent job describing 88% of the people in the US working population, and then some. Key words here are, "contentment" and "Prozac." See how easily they seem to fit together in our society? And NOW we get to the root of this conversation and most possibly the cause too. Disregarding the so politely put "piddle," the words that jumped out at me are, "life is such a complete bore," and "I'm.....just purposeless."

Looking at the above comments, raise you hand if you too feel this way. OK! Put your hands down because you look stupid sitting there by yourself at the PC like that. :rolleyes: Sally, you have just described the majority of the human population. Most expressed as a chronic condition in the western world.

I ask you if this were not so, why are their so many books and seminars paid for on developing a successful life, personal development, self-improvement, finding contentment and peace, finding your higher purpose, "The Purpose Drive Life" programs at churches? I'm sure you are 100% right BUT, we have solved nothing here, have we? In addressing the above key points I submit we should never, never, never give into our chronic disease situations allowing IT to have power over us by saying our diseases are the cause and reason for our overall circumstances in life.

We have the absolute power to control our own thoughts and attitude about everything. Should we feel we have no purpose in life and we are leading a boring life, HELLO! Think of all the ways we DO have in our power to change that fact. I know this sounds like rah rah talk especially when you feel like crap right now, but it is not and is supported by many people and writings including the Bible.

Allow me this please. Since we're are going to feel like crap anyway and we can always climb back in bed with a serious "give a $**t" attitude, why not seek what we can do to find a new purpose, make our lives less boring, make a positive difference in other people's lives without regard to receiving anything but maybe a thank you.

I know the next question is, "how do we even start to do this?" The same way Pygmies eat an elephant. One bite at a time. Just do it but don't keep score because no body cares what the score is at half-time. It's the final score that makes any difference in life's game.

I apologize for taking up so much of your time with this diatribe. Can you feel how strongly I feel about this and work daily to over come the same challenges we all face? Take this for what it may be worth to you.

In any case may Peace be with you and us all.

Thanks Craig, I loved every word, even though you're full of ****..:D Just Kidding.:p I always hope for your great feedback.

I know, on a good day that I am still purposeful and needed. It's just a temporary, crapola day, pity party feeling.:rolleyes:.....and it helps to know I'm not alone.:):hug:

I'm sorry? Have you been talking to my MIL by any chance? She refers to me like that quite often over the last 40 years. LOL! :wink:

(I know, I've only been married to my first wife for 37 years this next month, but we've been dating since her sophomore year in high school. :eek:)

You know what depresses me most about this is, that I may be old enough to be your MIL.:eek::(

No wait, I'm only 70!:)

I have been thinking about this some more. I think that as long as I am feeling content, I am happy.

Yeah, happy just not hap hap happy!!:D

Feel better soon Sal. I have been there several times. Right now I am in a 'content' stage..I wonder if I'll ever be "happy" again!

Aw, Sally!:hug::hug: I can understand how you feel. I am in content mode right now.

I think that when we are not feeling well you busy yourself with trying to feel better. Then you start feeling better but you are not quite there yet. This is where contentment comes in. You're just content but not happy. Then you really start feeling better and the happier times come. This is true for everyone. I mean think of when kids are sick. They are so miserable when things are bad. Then they start feeling better and start alternating between irritable/cranky and happy and jumping around. Then when they are better, it is full on back to their normal selves. But, I think as adults we make things more complex. I have been trying to keep things more simple and less complex. It does make a difference.

I pray that better days are on their way for you.:hug: