Need advice regarding school
 

I work full time in retail. It is hard work for someone with MS. I'm trying to finish my MBA and my company pays the tuition. Classes start again January 1st. I'm exhausted just with my work schedule. I'm dreading classes starting again. But it will be our slow season at work.

I have seven, eight week classes to finish with my degree. It feels like it will be an eternity. What should I do? I'm so tired all the time. I feel like I'll need SSDI in the next few years. Am I being a baby? Please give me some advice or chastise me or whatever I need.

If I complete my degree it might help me to do office work later on but I don't know. :confused:

Definitely not being a baby, Ewizabeth. I can't tell you what is the future if you get the MBA. But it seems clear what the present will be--exhaustion.

When I was teaching in Community College, I had an opportunity to finish my second MA, which had been suspended years earlier. But it looked like too much for me to do and retain my wholeness. I knew my nerves couldn't take it. And I saw two compatriots commit suicide because they couldn't take the anguishes of working toward a Ph.D in our field. That was sobering.

It is so nice to think of what might be down the line if we hang in there. But we have a harder time hanging in there than most people. I had to quit and go on Social Security as few years later, just as you expect you might have to take that route.

Be sure to take out Long Term Disability if your employer offers this. It has been a steady although small addition to my pensions over the years because I did take it out,
and it provided income before SS kicked in. I got my Disability through my employment on the very first try.

Can you "think outside the box" as they used to say? Are there options such as a reduced work schedule? Will they still pay tuition if you are taking FMLA leave or working part-time?

I seem to recall your saying that your coworkers don't know you have MS, so maybe those aren't options.

Working full-time and going to school is daunting for someone WITHOUT a chronic illness. I can't imagine doing either one, much less both.

I'm not going to chastise, for sure. I could argue both sides of this one.

I'd hate to think of you working and struggling through school just to get a degree in time to have to stop working because of MS. MS never works on our time schedule, does it?.

Very timely for me to read this post!

My plan is that I'm going to continue in schoool at a manageable pace for as long as I can. With my PhD I will be able to continue securing less physical positions, more opportunities and better money. My thought is even if I eventually only work one day a week I will probably make more money than the average disability income.

It is a gamble but I figure I will have plenty of time to relax when MS finally takes my ability to work and no way do I want to look back in 5 years and still be slogging along without having attempted it. :(

If you want to go to school go for it.
If not, think of pros versus cons. If it's worth the gamble, go for it.
If not, carpe diem.

I simply cant fatham how you do it Wiz!!! Even if I were young like you, I dont think I could keep up with your schedule.:eek:

I am retired, which was actually good timing for me since my MS really started acting up and worsening in my mid fifties. By my mid sixties, there was no question of ever working again.:(

My advise.... wait until you are forced to retire to get your MBA. Take a course or two towards your masters, if it wont be a major stress, but a full course now, in your possible MS tranformation, would defeat your purpose. IMHO.

In the end, you will do what God has given you the strength and will to do. Good wishes Dear..:hug:

Okay...you asked...

Wiz, you have the energy of a diesel freight train engine...and strong motivation to get as much out of life as possible. For this I totally respect you.

Now...you know the spoons theory. I personally feel that our Lifesource has only so much Chi, or energy, to be used in one life. Some of us get even more energy from living a fulfilling life. Some of us burn the candle at both ends and end up leaving this beautiful planet way too early...

it all depends on what you wish to get out of what you are doing with your life. You also have to take into account what impact MS is taking on your life energy stores. We all know that the stress on our bodies from MS can indeed be formidable. Is it wise to get as much living in as we can, while we are still able to? Or is it wiser to scale back, living at a slower pace, trying our best to live a high quality life?

You need to go and get quiet...do some deep breathing...then see yourself in 5 years in your mind. How do you want your life to look? How will it look if you keep at the pace you are currently going?

I personally feel that your intuition is knocking at your door, trying to get your attention...otherwise you wouldn't be asking these important questions.

And please, don't let fear be a factor. Peace, calm, and centered while you ponder is the way to make the right decision. You seem to love your job. Are you enjoying the schoolwork as much as your job? Or do you like the school work more than your job? Is there another way to learn about life without the long term goal of a degree? Or is this an achievement that has been a dream for awhile? I went back to school at the age of 38 to get my BA. It was a life-long dream, and I am so glad I did it, even though it was tough with working part time and running a household with 4 kids...I wouldn't trade that experience for anything!

So, dear friend, ponder in peace and quiet...you will do what is right for you. I cherish your place in my life, for you got me to a great doctor...let us know what you decide...:hug::hug:

hello ewizabeth
 

seven classes in 8 weeks is one heck of a load even without having a medical condition. Can you still get your degree, and do half of that at a time? Or perhaps a reduced work load.? You are not being a baby. You have a reason to be concerned. If you over do it. You may experience more health concerns. You need to find out what you think your limits are. You need sleep. Time for all those classes with the homework will take up alot of time too. For every hour in class, I remember 2 hours of work outside class. think seriously before you enbark on this heavy schedule. Think first of your health. If you really think SSDI is in your future, Maybe school isn't so important. Your health and your life is. Just my thoughts as I remember how hard college was for me and I was healthy at the time. All my best to you. ginnie

Thanks for the great advice. You all brought up some good points and also made me feel better.

Ginnie,

The classes each last eight weeks but they are extremely demanding because they are online and they are very strict about schedules and the quality of the work. That's a good thing because I know it's an honorable school. So if I took all seven classes in a row I would finish in about 13 months or so.

My work is enjoyable but retail hours vary a lot. I might work until 8:30pm one day and need to be at work 11 hours later to open the store. Also, I stand up all day to sell and I work for a commission. So you can see all of the different things that are key here.

I was thinking that I could speak with the college and take classes every other eight weeks but then I am just drawing out the time it takes me to finish.

Another idea I had was that I could try to transfer to a desk job but those would involve a commute of anywhere of 45 to 90 minutes each way. But they would be regular 9-5 hours M-F.

I'm going to think about this a lot today. You all gave me some good support. :grouphug: Love you all dear friends. :grouphug:

You are a very intelligent, vivacious person. If you can find a job that still gives you stimulation and interaction with others, it might be a good idea...you are amazing!!:D

Hi ewizabeth
 

I am glad to hear you are giving this decision all your attention. I especially liked DebbieDs' response about the energy we have in our lives. My concern was exactly that. You don't want to burn the candle at both ends and burn out! If you care to, make a list of the pro's and con's of the parts of your life that will be effected by your decision. See which one has the most importance. That idea of a 9-5 job sounds good except for the commute, that travel time. My cousin has MS, so I know what it is your are facing with that condition. All the posts you received have valuable advice and council. This is a big decision, so do go back and read them all again. There will be words of encouragement any time you come back here, in which ever way you decide. Take the deep breath, with peace and guiet your heart. I hope your holidays are good ones. ginnie:santa::Clever::Ponder::Good-Luck:

Jules, you surely thought it through! You have planned well.

Ewizabeth, the desk job with the commute, if you can have that, sounds like a good idea.
For most people a desk job is maybe not as appealing as a standing up selling job, because you are more active standing up. But I gather this is a job in which you don't get to periodically sit down, which would make all the difference for a person with MS.

In my teaching job, I stood up about half the time, including walking between classes and between classes and office, and sat down the rest of the time. So I was up and down constantly, and this allowed me to take the load off my feet, legs, back, whatever might be sluggish because of neurological difficulty. But if you only get lunch break and two afternoon breaks out of 8 hours, or even more hours when you work late, that's too much time on your feet unbroken by sitting down.

A teacher at our college got MS and within a couple of years she took a secretarial desk job in the Business Department. I didn't know her well but I passed her every day on my way to class. I thought that this was kind and decent of the Business Dept. to give her a sit-down job so she could continue to work.

The commute doesn't sound too bad if you are riding a bus. Driving that much might be a lot to do, especially if it entails a polluted freeway on which you are right down in the pollution (on a bus you are seated higher than in a car). I used to commute 45 minutes to an hour to high school on a bus, and it was good day dreaming time after school, or even reading time.

I don't know if that would make it easier to take the classes--does not sound like it particularly. But maybe.

Wiz - It is a lot to think about and can easily become overwhelming. I can definitely see where having an MBA will give you more opportunities for a sit down type job in the future. And I do think you should plan and continue your education as education always pays off in the end.

Can you switch to part-time work at the store?
Can you stop working and just focus on school?
Can you find something that is home-based and work from home? (That's what I do and for me it has been a blessing)
Will taking the classes every other eight weeks make that much of a difference? Thirteen months vs 26 months?

These are just some questions that I would ask if we were sitting down and talking about it. I would make a list of pros and cons as well as what you feel you need to do. Listen to your intuition. It's telling you something, just pay attention to it.

I know that you will make the right decision for you. And, as others have posted, you are amazing!!! I admire you greatly for all that you do. :hug:

I want to add my two cents regarding not working to focus on school which is something I hear often from people who think they will be rolling in the bucks as they advance their education. To me it is kind of like the mindset that a mortgage is "good debt" or school loans are "a necessity" to justify overspending which in many cases is flawed logic.

Imvho as an adult, MS or not and most especially with MS, quitting work while you are still able to work is never a good idea. Even if you figure the amount of income part-time wages would bring in that is a tremendous amount of money over the course of a few years that you may never be able to recoup especially if you are a. old or b. have MS (sadly both of which I am)

I worked about 30 hours through nursing school which was discouraged but by the time I got my RN I would have missed out on over $120,000 worth of income. That is money I would never be able to make up and desperately needed should I have become disabled and unable to work during that time.

For me even though I'm exhausted most of the time I have a good feeling in that I am making hay while the sun is shining and plan to continue at this crazy pace for as long as I possibly can. I'm thinking I can rest when I'm finally disabled by this monster. :o

Jules- You make a valid point. Therefore, I take back that question.:p Working and going to school is hard. I took worked many hours while I was in college. In fact once clinicals started, I rarely slept and/or ate. But, I needed the money and it is just what I had to do.

I do want to add that you would not only lose that income if you completely quit but the work credits you may need if you apply for SSDI in the future. So, I don't think quitting, unless you find another job, would be a good idea.

What a great point I never considered the SSDI credits!

hi wiz,

you've gotten great suggestions.
as ann landers would say "are you further to than further from?"
i'd hate to see you give up school when you've worked so hard and long.
getting a masters is a very big deal.

if you could prolong school so you could do both that sounds good.
my niece is 22 and just did the same thing in order to get enuf good grades to graduate.

if both school and work would meet you half way that sounds ideal.
thinking of work credits is a very valid thought. you will be glad to have as many credits as possible when the time comes.

please let us know what you decide.
best of luck.

Really great suggestions and ideas here...especially regarding SSDI...I get a very small amount due to the fact that I always worked part time so I would be home for the kids, so my social security didn't build up very high. Still I'm grateful for what I do get...

Wiz, you're a very smart gal...you'll figure out what's best...

Heck - I don't know what to say here - I am going against most others, but, if this is something you really want - something that will give you more realistic job opportunities, and something that will make you feel like you have achieved something in spite of you damned MS - GO FOR IT!!!

You are YOU first, and an MS sufferer second. If this is something you want for YOU and not for others then push yourself. At the end there will be pieces to pick up and deal with, but you will have the satisfaction of knowing that you have done it.

Try and take the time you need, get help wherever you can but don't let this disease take the essence of who you are.

Just my thoughts and maybe not popular with others.....but, this bloody disease takes enough already.

Lyn