Mri today!!! Scared!! Ready nervous
 

Nervous! today is my head MRI. I'm so ready for answers. I have been waiting for months for this day! I'm sooo nervous! I'm scared it will come back clean. I know that sounds crazy but this is the only thing that has made sense at all and I'm scared with this MRI he is basically just going to tell me I'm insane and push me to the side. I'm scared that it will come back showing that it really is MS and then I have a life long battle with no hope for fixing these problems, Then again I'm scared to death it will come back clean & then what? no explanation no hope of finding any answers any time soon. Getting him to repeat the MRI on the cervical and thoracic spine is probably not likely. But then I have nothing that explains any of it so I'm basically back to square 0. not even square 1 because at this point they will have ruled out MS, RA, Fibro, & SLE!

I don't know if anyone really understands the way I feel about this but I'm real scared. Scared that it will come back showing MS and scared that it won't. MAYBE I REALLY AM CRAZY!

If you are crazy, then a lot of us are. That's exactly the way I felt. I had a meltdown in front of my husband, and said essentially the same as you: "I don't want MS, but I know (sob sob) there's SOMETHING wrong with me (sob sob) and the only thing left (sob sob) is that I'm (sob) CRA-A-A-Z-Y-Y-Y, waaaahhhhhh!"

Just remember that we're all right behind you and know right where you're coming from. Hang in there. Oh, and there IS hope for fixing things--not a guarantee, but there is hope!

Good luck Harvey! I hope you get some answers. And just because the MRI comes back negative doesn't mean you are crazy.

I agree with B2Y. I had a neuro tell me that he had a friend who was a psychiatrist and that he could refer me to him.

Just take it one step at a time. I know it's hard not to be worried, to be scared, but take it easy. :hug::hug:

it will be over before ya know it. I hope you get some answers. :hug:

I think we have all been here. Bottom line is, that the devil you know is not as scary as the one that plagues your thoughts in the dark of night when everything seems worse.

No, MS is not a good diagnosis, but there are many worse ones we could be given. My thoughts are with you, and hoping that you get something concrete that you can get to know and learn how to fight/or accept.

We are all feeling like we are crazy sometimes, and I have yet to meet a person with MS who hasn't felt (or been made to feel) like a hypochondriac at some time.

Thinking of you, as Dejibo said, it will be over in no time, and I hope it leads you to some answers - one way or the other.

Regards

Lyn

Good wishes for results today, for you H. Angel(crazy lady:D)

We all feel that way when trying to find out what is causing the strange symptoms...
and because there are so many diseases that can cause MS-like symptoms, it is a long, frustrating process.

AND...just because it comes back clean this time...doesn't mean it isn't eventually going to show up.

Are you having a spine MRI, too?

Note from the Crazy Lady
 

No Debbie he refused to do spine scan! I was mad but I took what I could get. Because he assured me I DO NOT HAVE MS BUT HE CAN NOT TELL ME WHAT I DO HAVE! soooo... long story short I got to the imaging center today & the reason they have on my records for MRI is for "HEADACHES!" NOTHING ABOUT DIAGNOSTIC FOR MS!!! I WAS FURIOUS! they asked me twice why I was getting the mri both times I told them.. after the first round of mri's without contrast just before she is about to inject me she asked me if I was ok. I said no not really I'm bout ready to cry and she asked why I said I was really upset with my dr and scared that the MRI wasn't going to show what I was being tested for and she said what is that I told her that he told me he was going to send me for an MRI to check for MS and she said well thats not whats ordered. and she looked at me she said but hold on let me take a few more pictures before I put the contrast in that is specific for MS. Even tho thats not what he ordered it's what he's getting! I wanted to really cry then! I got my images on disk! VERY INTERESTING STUFF! I'm not real sure what I'm looking at despite googleing several images specific to MS. The one that is most concerning is the Diffusion pics! because from what I've read everywhere areas that show bright white are areas that show some damage (anyone who knows if this is true or not please chime in!!!) I had a LOTTTTTT of bright white areas and splotches! It was almost like reading ink blotches hahaha. Well I made this story longer than intended. Even tho I didn't get my full MRI I'm praying there is enough evidence to warrant another MRI if necessary. I think because I requested the MRI, because my dr was going to just send me home again with another script for more pain meds, and I suggested MS and he assured me it wasn't and I asked him why not check to rule it out I have all the symptoms and then some & he looked at me like I was an idiot. As if I was spending HIS MONEY or something! I guess he thought I was too stupid or that they wouldn't ask me why I was having the MRI. GUESS HE THOUGHT WRONG! I have always been an advocate for myself & my children and I don't stop until I have answers! Not to mention my drs office didn't even call and tell me about the appt they had scheduled until 2 days before the appt!!!!!! I assume they weren't going to tell me so I'd miss it. And I assume that he was going to run the general Mri (FOR HEADACHES!) and then tell me well we did the MRI and it didn't show anything indicating MS. SO FRUSTRATED! NEEDLESS TO SAY IM CHANGING DRS. I'm picking up my medical records on Monday. I told them I needed them for my attorney who was about to start my disability paperwork. haha I'd venture to bet, given the most recent info about his "diagnosis" Id bet there's NOTHING in my records about my complaints every single month for the last 10 months! IM TIRED OF NOT KNOWING!!! ENOUGH IS ENOUGH! SO NOW WE WAIT.

Signed,
:p The Crazy Lady!!! :rolleyes:

Dear you're not crazy
 

The stress from waiting for all the issues to resolve, the tests, the appointments, the anxiety. You are not crazy. It is hard to deal with any time someone doesn't know what is wrong with them. One step at a time. There will be alot of support here for you. I wish you all the best. I hope there are answers. ginnie

Good for you CL:D, kick that n'r do well to the curb!!:hug:

I have angels with me ;)
 

Thanks Sally!
I felt much better after coming home and realizing that I have an angel in my brain!! ;) I will have to see if I could figure out how to share the image with you all. It's very interesting. It's on the diffusion images! I dont know what any of them mean at all but it's definitely pretty cool! I saw lots of weird looking stuff in my brain!! Lots of weird black voids & lots of bright white blobs! It can ONLY MEAN ONE THING!!!..................

........................


.............................
........................
................... YEP YOU GUESSED IT!
WE WAIT! CUZ IM CLUELESS!!HAHAHAHAHA :D:rolleyes: I shoulda been a DR!

Cool!! Well you are Harvey's Angel!!:D

And I remind him of that daily!! :) lol.

Hi harveys angels
 

Yep, you have all your marbles....not crazy. I wish all the best for you. ginnie

Thanks Ginnie. I can't wait to hear from the dr! :hug::hug:

Hi Harveysangels
 

Yes, I am hoping for you too. I know what it is like to wait for results, then being afraid of what they find, or not find. I care, let me know how goes. prayers are coming your way. ginnie:hug:

Thanks Ginnie! WILL DO! :hug::hug: You're an angel yourself! :)

Mri news!
 

Well apparently i'm just crazy! I'm going to make an appt and tell the dr i want my pain meds refilled and give me some antidepressants or xanax & just live the sedated life i'm obviously supposed to live because according to them my mri came back normal! I'm so frustrated and depressed it's not even funny. As if my symptoms are going to just magically disappear because it came back normal! They have already checked and treated my vitamin deficiency so it can't be that! With regular treatment of b12 & vit. D my levels are within normal range so it's not that! :( i dont even know what to do. I wouldn't even second guess the ruling out ms if he had done a spinal mri also. But he only did the brain with & without contrast i dont even know where to turn. I think i may just have myself checked into the mental hospital i can't do this crap no more!

Well now you do what the rest of us do or have done and wait it out or go to one of the MS clinics and get a 2nd opinion and an MRI of spine...LP?


We are with you..:hug:

Oh, I have been where you are more than once! Yes, "hysterical conversion reaction" when the myocolonic jerks started. I felt the same as you. I called the MS support group leader that I was supposed to meet for the first time that night and she said, "Oh, I think you need to come and talk w us." It was the best move.

I don't know what you have but see if you can see this guy or the other neuro again in 3 to 6 months so they can see any changes over time.

So many have gone through this. And the Chronic Fatigue/Fibro myalgia sufferers, too.

I'll be thinking about you today and don't you dare be embarrassed for 1 second. They just don't know YET what is wrong.

ANN

Dear :you still are not crazy
 

I am sorry that the results left no conclusions. Sally had a good post also. Please don't give up or give in. We know inside when something is wrong. doctors don't always find out what is wrong. Keep going until you find the answers. I will keep you in my thoughts. ginnie:hug:

It took me 20 years for my diagnosis. And my brain MRI is perfectly normal. It was lesions on my spine and a positive spinal tap that finally got me diagnosed.

Don't give up, and don't let them tell you that you're crazy.