running out of methods of cope
 

I am trying these life skills class to help me better control my triggers and target behaviors. I am running out of options to better control my emotional mind. I am trying to focus on the now but I am just struggling.

I am repeatively putting myself down mentally, and doing horrible at work. Today was just an awful day that getting away from it is not even working. I keep crying a lot for days now. Feeling miserable. I try so hard to use the skills they teach me but I feel it is not working. I feel depressed.

And I have a new thing where at night I hear voices in my head, before sleeping. I hear shouting. Are they r.e.ms? I am a bit frightened.
i have not had this before. I am on medicine lamictal 225mg and 1/4 clonopin.

Anything I should try to calm down. I am drinking chamomile tea but it is not enough.

Thank you
Sharla

hi sharla,
I am sorry that you are struggling right now.
bizi

Are you working with a therapist? Are you in an out patient therapy group? can you call them tomorrow or will you see them soon?
tell me more about the help that you are getting.
I have to take an antipsychotic medication to stay stable. it is called geodon.
I also take 1mg of klonipin at night to sleep. and am taking 200 mg of lamictal at night.
these meds keep me stable for the most part...except when I drank too much and made me manic.
again I am sorry it is so hard right now. be strong, you will get thru this. is hubby being supportive?
bizi

hi bizi
 

Hubby is very supportive of me. Very thankful for that. I just want my brain under control. Or to at least make my brain shut up. I was on anti psychotic abilify. But I end up with akethesia. Other wise I would of liked to stay put on it. Thanks bizi, good to hear from you. You have a cute cat.

Sharla

Sounds like you need to try a different anti psychotic medicine for one.
If the abilify helped to a degree. I would definately give your doctor
a call.

I hope you get some help soon.

Donna:grouphug::hug:

Hi Sharla I'm sorry that you are going through a painful time. It sounds like a emotional upheaval. Has anything made you upset,or angry in the last couple of months?

I'm so sorry that you are hurting. I really am. Do you have a pdoc that you can talk to tomorrow morning for a appointment. The voices may be temporary. BF:hug::hug::hug:

They put me on abilify,and it didn't work. Then they put me on seroquel,and it worked. It's strong medication though. BF:hug::grouphug::grouphug::hug::smileypray:

New Here
 

Low self esteem is a very addictive form of power. Not to anybody but yourself, although the closest ones to you also feel the pain. As the nurturing hearts approach teaches, ignore the negative and strongly reinforce the positives in your life. I don't know you, but I can clearly see that you are a comforter for others before yourself, and you need to remember to care for yourself in that same manner! I know that one from experience. There are many people who love you, and care about you as much as you do for them. Take care, Girl! :grouphug:

My old pdoc called this "Pre-Sleep-Dreaming."
Once I started on Klonopin, they mostly went away.

Skills they teach you in class can help somewhat but they are not substitutes for good medications.

Are you trying to get pregnant?


M

Hi, Sharla,

What kind of life skills class is this? It sounds like B.S. to me.
You need to be on better and stronger medications.
Call the pdoc or go to the hospital.
I am very sorry that you are going through this.


M

hang in there
 

Dear Sharla,

I wish you weren't going through this it does sound so frightening. :(
Thank goodness hubby is being supportive. I am glad for that.

I agree with the others' - please contact your psychiatrist immediately and ask to be seen ASAP. Talk about what is happening to you.

You should also inform him/her regarding some issues brought up in this thread by Steve and Mari, ie:
-- whether something recent has upset you (was there an incident that you can identify that set off these recent problems)?
-- whether you are currently trying to get pregnant.

you need not share these things with us unless you wish to, but these are important pieces of information for your doctor, in order that he/she can provide appropriate treatment. do please call the doctor asap.

i am sending you calming thoughts, love, hope, and many hugs. :hug::hug::hug:

you hang in there and let us know how you are ok?

:heartthrob: :circlelove: :heartthrob:

~ waves ~

thank you everyone
 

I called the pdoc before I posted here. :) I feel better than yesterday. There were several things that happened this month that has triggered me off. And yesterday, a medical emergency happened to another employee. He had an asthma attack and lied about being ok. I told him he has to seek medical attention asap. The guy left his inhaler at home along with his phone! I was angered by his carelessness. I tried to get an ambulance he said no. A cab, he said no. I at this rate made a co worker take him to hospital that was a block away. He agreed to that. Then decides to change his mind hop on a train and said he was fine. The guy has always never listened to me even when it came to work. So that is a very big set off for me yesterday. I don't know if the guy is alive or dead. I will find out today I guess. Next time I am just calling an ambulance against his will and I will tell him to shut up and sit tight. I am soooo done being polite to this guy. Being assistant manager is so hard. But it pays my bills. I would like to post a few more times but I have get to work. I will keep everyone updated on meds. I definitely need more of it.

Dear Sharla,

I'm really glad to hear you'd already called your pdoc! :):)

What a terrible incident to go through. You did a good job trying to help the guy in so many ways. If he was walking to get a train he must have been breathing so i suppose the emergency was over by then. He will most likely be ok.

A suggestion: Your workplace probably has procedural guidelines for medical emergencies/illness/injury, that cover company policy, legal and financial liabilities.

Probably your manager and most certainly the HR manager should be able to provide guidance on how to handle these situations. Sometimes there are even little reference booklets.

Managing other people is a stressful job, themoreso when these incidents happen. Please take a several deep breaths, and pat yourself on the back for trying to respect the guy's wishes while taking care of him at the same time.

I hope life gets easier on you and you don't have so many triggering events.

(((((((hugs)))))))

~ waves ~

Sharla

You did everything for him that you could. It honestly sounds like
he has a phobia about hospitals, or no insurance.

I also have asthma, and its sometimes hard to recover from a attack.
And leaving your inhaler at home is not good. You were right to
worry and try to send him to the hospital. I hope he is okay.

But from my experience if he could walk to catch a train he was okay.
He had gotten a second breath and was working to get home. Or
where ever else he wanted to go.

Donna:grouphug::hug:

Dear Sharla,

You are not responsible for other people. You are responsible only for yourself and to some extent your husband.

I am aware that you live in a huge city and that you are around lots of people all day. Find ways to distance yourself from what is going on with those other people. Let them be. Let them make decisions for themselves and let them move about in their day as they choose. Give them courtesy/ respect / emotional distance. Also, freeing them also frees you.
I think sometimes you might feel kind of bombarded by people and events and you let all that get to you. Take some slow belly breaths in and out and focus on your body and your mind. You can do that.

I hope today is going o.k. for you. I am glad you spoke to the pdoc and have plans to get the medications straightened out.

Mari

I hope that this employee learns his lessen,and brings his inhaler the next time.

It's hard to work with people when they don't listen to you,when they don't work as a team,when they don't communicate,and when they back stab,and betray fellow workers,and customers.

This type of thing can make you angry every day. That anger,and frustration has a draining affect on us who are sensitive.

I'd have imaginations going to work about interring the work force in the middle of a possible bad day,or seeing myself getting jumped on because someone want's to vent on someone. At night I would see these things in my mind after going to bed. These thoughts would dance through my mind before I'd fall asleep.

We are sensitive people,and some are most certainly not. These things bother me also,and I find out that the other ones don't care. It's a hard world out there. BF:hug::hug::hug:

You're so right. That's why I'm glad this little corner of cyberspace feels safe.

better day
 

Thank you Mari you are correct about distancing myself from people. And letting them make their own choices, and so on. I will start doing that from now on. I would love to feel free from this chaos. Thank you Mari for the post.

Thank you Donna for sharing. This helped me calm down. Now I can panic less in my head. today he came into work fine. But I gave him an ear full. I had to say something.
He got the picture thank goodness.

thank you waves! I am getting better.
Got s hold of the pdoc. And she said that i need to sleep really well every night. Get as many hours of sleep as possible. So i am doing exactly that. And drink chamomile tea. I see her Friday.

Sleep is good.
 

Dear Sharla,

Yes, sleep is good. :)
Make that your main goal everyday. It is sooo important.
M

I am glad that you are seeing your pdoc this friday. wonder if you have a tdoc therapist to work on issues as well?
bizi

sorry for the late reply. I do have a tdoc as well. I get to see everyone tommorow.

Thank you bizi

thank you for posting...good to see you.
((((((HUGS)))))
bizi

Glad you posted Sharla

We do understand that you have a job and life too.

So we are just glad you can come in when available.

Stay safe, and happy.

donna:hug::grouphug: