not feeling grounded
 

lately i don't feel connected to anything and it is pretty scarey. the wellbutrin isn't working for this. I try to think of God and have a connection there. I have had a lot of negative thoughts. I did call Bellevue and have to go down there to get a card. I was told the next appointment isn't til June. I was also told an extraction is 60 dollars. I don't believe it even though i asked twice. NYU dental clinic which is cheap charges 115. I felt good about my calling the dental clinic but that lasted only a few hours. It is just so awful waking up in the morning.
bobby

I am sorry that you are not feeling grounded this morning. I think that it is great that you made the phone call. good for you. I amglad that you have your faith to hang onto. Could you get out in nature somehow? What are your temperatures like there right now?
keep posting, we are listening.
Waves is doing really badly right now I feel sorry for her.
Email if you are inclined.
bizi

Dear Bobby,

I am sorry that you are going through this.
I talk aloud to myself or to God. That helps.


Sometimes I hold things in my hands (like some stones I have).
Mari

Aw dear Bobby :hug:

So sorry to read this. Feel better soon. Many of us are really down these days, there is something in the air I guess.... :mad:

HUGS

Oh Bobby, I hope a turn happens soon and you can feel better.
Hugs :hug:
Di

Hi, Bobby,

I hope that you can have some good days with some good moments.

Mari

thanks. i enjoyed watching the Masters yesterday. I got on the scale today and gained a few pounds. My appetite has returned and i am worried i might keep on gaining back the weight. I am going to try to be more careful. I woke up really down but then managed to look at a situation differently and felt less troubled.
today i think i will skip the senior center which might be a bad idea but i am really worried about my weight now. I plan to drink a lot of water and coffee.
I am clinging to God.
bobby

Hi, Bobby,

When I was reading about the tournament (there was a little story about Tiger's issue about the score card) I thought about you.

Maybe you will go to the senior center another day this week.

Mari

poor tiger....
i just realized that maybe i am getting more in tune with my feelings now that i am only taking 25 m of topamax.....i feeling things i don't want to feel.
bobby

Bobby,

Maybe the Topamax was helping you.
Those feelings are not real -- they are the bipolar.

Mari

i thought of that but i think i would rather feel more than feel less clear. i have so many fears. my stocks are doing terribly and will continue to do terribly. i started my diet yesterday so don't have food to look forward to. I am going to try to go to bellevue next week to get a card so i can make an appointment for June for my teeth. I am skipping the senior center also because i gained weight and last time i couldn't even resist a brownie...I haven't had a brownie in years.
if i cling more to God and combat my fears with my faith in God and not try to go against God's will, ie having my teeth done for instance if you want to look at it that way(boy do i sound crazy), life should get easier. I am also having trouble dealing with my age. In the past ten years, it sort of just happened. I don't feel my age but when i look in the mirror i am sometimes shocked lol. the topamax seems to have wasted part of my life....at least that is how i feel now. it is important to feel and to think more clearly. it is frustrating to feel dulled.
maybe i am wrong and i need to feel dulled.
bobby

Hi, Bobby,
I probably have a love / hate relationship with my meds. Mostly I love the meds but I do wish I had more acuity going on. I guess dulling is good but only to a point and only if I am getting benefits that make putting up with the dulling worthwhile. . . .. I am not sure I explained that right.

M

I just wanted to give you a hug.
(((((HUGS)))))
bizi

Hi, Bobby,
 

Bobby,

Keep taking care. I hope that your week goes well.

Mari