Found Something
 

I am currently in 'Limbo' state for something discovered during my annual and routine ultra sound and pap smear.

As some may be aware, my mom passed on from Ovarian Cancer, back in 2010. Because of being a first generation blood relative, I have received yearly ultra sounds.

This year, not only was a cyst discovered, but a mark, that went right through the cyst, on my right ovary. ((I will attach a hand drawn diagram, to better explain what I mean.--drew it to show my boys' father))

My OBGYN mentioned that it is concerning, doesn't look like the aggressive stage 3 cell, nor is this being fed any blood nor oxygen, which the ultra sound machine can detect. However, it was mentioned, one of three things. Cancer, Borderline Cancer or a Benign growth/tumor. It's about 2cm and he mentioned that usually, when women do present with symptoms, etc, it's usually about 5cm. Keep in mind, I went in a healthy patient, for a routine pap and came out with the possibility of having cancer.

I am scheduled for a two week follow up, ultra sound, that will bring me to July 9th. He and I have already had a follow up discussion, via phone, because he wanted me to think long and hard about what my plan was for having more children. At 38, I am done, I don't have any prospects and frankly, I never wanted to have children in my 40's, hence late 20's/very early 30's. I feel like I just finished diaper duty, if that makes sense, I went 8 years straight doing that.

The discussion of a total hyst with ovary removal((haven't discussed cervix, please god, let's at least keep that, right?)) I am prepared/braced/informed about the immediate, full blown menopause, if I do end up with this. He will perform the laproscopic (sp?) hyst.

I had my CA-125 bllod drawn, am awaiting results. Due to the complications with the whole insurance thing, it will turn out, surgery first, then BRCA second. Which is fine by me. If the BRCA is a positive, then I've got breast cancer to wonder and worry about. If negative, then pulling the hyst wouldn't be covered and with a family history of ovarian cancer, with it being as deadly as it is, with having three young boys, and just knowing this thing has grown inside of me from one year to the next...the hyst would be more along the lines as preventative, not elective(which of course, I could say no, but um...I'm not chancing that, after seeing my mom live only 15 months post diagnosis)

On a more emotional note, this roller coaster ride is so much worse, yet there's similarities to the shock of the MS diagnosis, where every little ache and pain becomes suspect and just the worrying about the future. With MS, more worry about what could be disability wise, and with this more I want to see my children grow up and they deserve their mom around.

My OBGYN, recommends not driving myself crazy with wonder, it's just some moments are just stronger than others. This evening, just being one of those stronger moments of sadness, grief, and recognition of mortality.

I realize it's not the aggressive form my mom had, yet, some moments are reliving that pain of losing her. Some moments are filled with I want to kick some butt with this illness, and take that uterus and those ovaries out of my body and let's not let this form of cancer get me, type of moments. Some moments are psyching myself up for some major hot flashes, temperamental moments, night sweats, scoping out where I can find myself some good neighborhood pools to jump in---even the kiddie ones...the more light hearted moments too.

And also, deep down, curious to see, what, if anything, menopause will bring for my MS. All these things and more.

Anyone know of any cancer support groups to join? I've already been shown the way to hystersisters, for that aspect.

Sorry this photo is so big. Didn't expect it to upload, this size. The Ovary, the Cyst and that line is what is bringing me back to his office on the 9th. Surgery will be discussed then.

http://neurotalk.psychcentral.com/pi...pictureid=7514

Gladys-

You seem to have thought this through carefully from ever side I can think of.

I hope it is a benign growth but I'd have the surgery, just the same.

Best to you,
ANN

(((((Gladys))))). I too hope and pray that this nasty thing
is benign and that you have the hyst. with few if any after
effects.

Stay strong..:hug:

I had a hysterectomy complete, ovaries and cervix, at age 42 because of many menstrual problems. If you are not a smoker you might consider taking a low dose estrogen therapy which is what I did and might ward off a relapse. For me it wasn't a cancer risk but they did test the tissue to make sure it wasn't present.

It sounds like your doctor is on top of things and being proactive for your benefit. Hysterectomy is not major surgery but make sure you rest enough in your recovery. :hug::hug:

can they perform a laproscopic biopsy?

I had just uterus removed and I also was on HRT-a very small patch with minimal estrogen...really helped when I was beginning to feel hot flashes, etc. Don't they usually put you on HRT right after an oopherectomy?

This is frightening stuff and your emotions are right where they should be especially since you have a family history.
I am very glad they caught this issue now. Sounds like you are in good hands medically.

I know hormones and cancer do not mix and am aware of the challenges you would face should a total hysterectomy be deemed necessary. But lets stay positive that this thing is benign. That is the thought and prayer I will hold on to for you. Hugs:hug:

Sending prayers your way!

Hi Gladys

My thoughts are with you - this is certainly a difficult time, and I hope all works out well.

I had a hysterectomy six years ago, they took my uterus and cervix, but left my ovaries, so, unlike you, I didn't have to go through menopause early. Somehow, it was empowering to take that control, and looking back, from health and well-being perspective, it was one of the best things I ever did.

I hope you will find that this is the best thing you will ever do for your peace of mind, and your health right now - even though it will be hard from a hormonal aspect.

Best wishes

With the family history, the wait and see, I feel with just a biopsy, won't do, if you follow?

I would imagine they do put you on HRT, right after. I'll let you know, on Tuesday, the final plans.

The hyst is at my doctors recommendation.

CA-125 Negative
 

My doctors' office, called this afternoon. As suspected, the CA-125 came back, negative. Which is decent news to have. Means I have no inflamed cancer going on in my ovaries.

My doctor, doesn't like this one, because it cannot detect growths like mine, alone, without the ultra sound.

I am going to create my own blog on this topic of discussion. I've connected with two women on another site, that have had borderline cancers removed. Finding survivors, is daunting, but they are out there.

An ounce of prevention can go a long way. I'm developing quite an opinion on womens health, more than I ever have. As I, am personally, traversing these major female gynecological decisions. And I am forming a strong opinion on insurance coverage on the little things, that could be better watched over.

Taken me a while, to try and see, what 'lesson'/'message' was to be taken from losing my mom.....I may be closer to seeing the bigger picture here.

Hi Gladys
 

I sincerely hope and pray this is nothing. I would get the surgery as well. You have thought things though very well, and it is good to be educated about all of it. So sorry you have another worry. I will keep you in my prayers. ginnie:hug::grouphug:

Oh dear!:(:( I just teared up reading your post. I am so sorry you have to now go through this. You have been through so much over the past few years (well, at least the years I have "known" you.). I am glad you are being proactive about this. I think a hysterectomy is a good idea and a direction I would take if I were in your situation. You sound as if you have done your research and know the risks and benefits. The experience and knowledge you gained while your mom was ill is also helpful and beneficial in deciding what course you want to take. Of note, my sister just had a total hysterectomy. She has done well and so far has not needed any HRT, which she can't take anyhow due to the breast cancer she had. Please keep us posted on how you are doing and what you decide to do. I will keep you in my prayers.:hug::hug:

Gladys-

Sounds to me like you have made a decision, but need 'permission/confirmation'. You know know your thoughts and feelings better than anyone else. Only you can know what is the right way to proceed - and that is what makes it the "right thing to do".

It doesn't really matter what any of us thinks you should do - we don't have your body, your history and your family to think about; you do. Trust your heart and your docs and the answer will be clear. I hope this in some small helps

{{{hugs}}}:grouphug:

No matter what - we are here for you and don't plan on going anywhere

I had a hyst when I was 38. Everything gone but my left ovary. Doc didn't want me going thru total menopause, oh no, so I just get to go thru it twice! Thanks Doc!! Should've send her a card, but I couldn't quite get the wording civil! LOL It was for the best in my case, and I do hope it benefits you in your case. Keeping you in my prayers! :hug:

Women experience menopause in different ways. I had a hysterectomy at 41 but had one ovary left. When I finally went through menopause it was "nothing" that I could detect as different from everything I had lived through since the age of 17. In other words, I still had neurological symptoms but I did not have hot flashes at all. Nothing changed. The doctors misinterpreted my neuro symptoms as menopause, however, and put me on wild yam cream for hormones. I did this wild yam thing four different times, and each time reacted so badly (spasticity) within four days that I was off the yam. I later was shown to have Porphyria, which means those kind of hormones are not acceptable, so that later explained it. However, my point here is that, for me, menopause did not change me. I still had episodes of imbalance and other neuro problems, and spasticity, but no hot flashes, and I was no more temperamental than usual. But I suppose I've always been temperamental, so that does not mean much.

I would run not walk to the OR in your case. Best wishes for a great outcome.

Update!!!
 

UPDATE:

Well, then.

Had my second ultra sound yesterday. Had a nice conversation with the u/s technician. She told me, that she didn't find anything unusual 2 weeks ago. She even, in front of my showed me everything she typed up today on her report.

She brought up both series and compared and contrasted for me, my right ovary from 2 weeks ago, to today. Today, there's nothing there.

You see, the little 'growth' she showed me, well, that shows up in some women every month, and it alternates sides. So next month, most likely, in two weeks, I will have something like that on my left ovary.

If you'd like artistic expression, think of it like that was the point of release for my egg to head off to my fallopian tube. Us, women, we sure do have something special going on inside of us, don't we?

By the time, my doctor came into the exam room, just for a discussion, this time. My ultra sounds were beautiful. And wow, there's nothing there now. So, I can just wait until next year, for another ultra sound with my annual exam. No mention of what my intentions were for having more kids.

I was offered to take the BRCA test. Wow, who knew, it's not a blood test? And it can be done, in office, to be sent off to a laboratory? Just make sure you've had nothing to eat or drink for at least 30 minutes to an hour prior. Considering I'd been in that office from 145pm and it was now 315pm, that really wasn't an issue.

You take a small travel sized bottle of Scope, two little cups, that you fill up with the mouthwash. And then there is this big sealed tube. Swish for at least 30 seconds and spit it into the tube, repeat and just make sure that you fill the vile to the #20. Which is precisely two of those little cups, provided you spit it out with precision, which for me, no problem.

Yes, it will tap into your deductible, but like anything, you can make monthly payment arrangements. Even if you had to pay the full amount, hey, the price of knowing your risk factor for developing breast or ovarian cancer, 3K, spaced out with good faith payments could give even those on tighter budgets peace of mind.

I cannot believe, all that I needed to consider, etc, over the past two weeks! I have certainly learned a lot!

I would have preferred, that two weeks ago, he didn't mention cancer, that he just said there's a growth, and it could be just the cyst or the techs photography skills and let's see. Hey, even look at date of last period and calculate, that I could have very well been ovulating. And, had today, there'd been something, then ask me, my intentions for more children.

Yes, it's good news, and a relief, in that regards! But for a woman who has an anxiety disorder and is prone to heart palpitations, can't wait to tell this one to my pdoc, who needed to prescribe me Xanax through a phone consult, when I see him next week.

After all, I was under the impression, especially after talking to him on the phone, 4 days after that first u/s, that I was going to be bracing myself for a preventative measure and educating myself on what hysterectomies are all about. I worried about the children that I have, and grieved for the one(s) I would never have the chance of having.

My ex and I were talking about that final aspect today. He went with the V because the thought tying my tubes, I had said, years ago with him, that I didn't want to live with that regret. SO, yeah, this was a lot for me to deal with emotionally as far as a hysterectomy.

I cannot express enough the appreciation I feel, over all of you 'being there' for me, through this.

And I am also relieved, to not have to worry about what this would do to my MS, right now!

Just wanted to add something a little lighter to all of this, about my experience...


Imagine that, in my medical files, now, there is a photograph/of the ultra-sound variety, of me ovulating!!

The egg being pushed through the door of my ovary, into my fallopian tube!!

How cool is that, really when you stop and think about it?!!

There's a moment of Ovulation in my Medical Records!! :cool:

What a relief!!!:hug:

Hooray!! I'm glad it was a false alarm!! :hug:

Your comment about the ovulation made me think that it could be used for a country song, "oooh baby, you make my eggs drop..... ";)

But seriously, I'm so relieved for you too and I'm glad you're getting the test done. Isn't that the same test that Angelina Jolie had because of the cancer history in her family?

Gladys-

I am so very happy for you. This is the best new I've heard in a long while.

That tech was really on the ball! Sorry you had to suffer the worry.

ANN

Oh WHEW! :yahoo:

:hit-safe:

Good job, Gladys!