I still hate to take a shower or even wash at all
 

Showering remains a core.
It takes all my effort.
After wards I am clean ---and that is nice. But I am not convinced it is a good trade off

M

Hi Mari
 

I am wondering if a change wouldn't be good. One thing I do is use a natural sponge, it feels so good! I also use a good scented body wash that again I just love. Those bubbles and scent, make my shower time one I look forward to all the time! I light a candle and play music too. Often I just sit on the chair in the shower and just enjoy the warmth. So very relaxing! Music takes you to a whole new level of comfort. I play "Sting". Try these things if you can, and make shower time fun again, like when you were a kid. ginnie:hug:

thoughts?
 

I understand, Mari.

I used to enjoy showering, but I don't any more - there is a lot of overhead especially in this house. Now, I have a heavy ambivalence about showering.

Lately it has felt easier but I am not sure why. I feel relieved and lucky about that. When I was having near-fainting spells I utterly despised it. Even washing can be a difficult alternative, especially if you try to do everything at once - that takes a darn long time.

My work around was the ol' divide and conquer: wash pieces just one part at a time. I might do different parts on the same day but with breaks in between. Doing that, I can also give priority to parts that need it more frequently.

I might do a small part like just my face or my neck. An arm today and one tomorrow (arms per se don't get terribly dirty from one day to the next). Sometimes I will wash sweat points - insides of elbows and backs of knees. It might sound stupid but it helps me to do this at times. I stay cleaner than I would if I tried to take whole body whacks because I might not be able to get myself to. And this way I can keep strategic places clean, if ya know what I mean.

For some areas, like feet, it might help to have a plastic basin to use rather than having to climb in the tub and ending up getting splashed left right and center, not to mention a basin is handier to clean than the tub.

Sometimes rather than washing by splashing water on (with or w/o a cloth), I will wet a wash-cloth with warm water, soap it up and mostly squeeze it out, scrub a small area with that, rinse the cloth well, and then wipe down to rinse. I usually repeat the wipe/rinse to make sure I get all the soap off. I barely need to dry off when I do that - I pretty much air-dry, lol. Effective and efficient!

I don't know if these things can help you... or maybe just give you some other ideas to work with possibly.

waves

Showers are hard for me too. But mainly because I loved to take
baths. But can't anymore. I can't get back up. I am really in trouble
I have no strength in my legs or knees. So I have to solve the problem.

I am working on this, but don't know how.

Ugh.

Donna:hug::grouphug:

too depressed for this conversation. I apologize for starting it.
 

Hi, Ginnie and Waves,

After reading what you wrote, I am wondering if I am too depressed to post here.

Ginnie,
You post a beautiful picture of how you have arranged your environment.
Bath time at your place sounds lovely and refreshing.

====
I do not like to go into the bath room with hard surfaces, sharp corners, and water. I feel barely safe to move around. Adding tasks that for example that involve holding things like towel and soap make the whole process tricky.

Music involves power of some sort (electricity or batteries)-- and that does not seem like a good thing to have around water, especially if I am feeling like I already have too many things that I have to think about.
I am extraordinary reactive to most scents, even natural ones (cannot have fresh flowers in my space for example). Candles made from petroleum would distress me and candles made from bees wax are often sold with scents added although I might buy some unscented ones online for hurricane preparedness.
Music upsets me more than anything else I encounter in my day. It will be something for me to work on in therapy in the far off future.


Waves,

Your basin idea is good.I have done that before.

True, I do usually wash in bits and pieces.

Yes. Exactly.
Yes to air drying.
I think I wait too long even for the bits and pieces until I am so behind that I absolutely have to put myself in the water.

I am feeling that I need to print some signs with the steps.
1.
2.
3.
4.

If I think of something as only a three step process, maybe I can do it, be done with it, and be ok. with washing the next bit a day or so or three later.


Mari

Donna,

I am sorry you cannot enjoy showers.

Would it help to have safety bars?
http://homeguides.sfgate.com/install...tub-60907.html


One of my brothers made changes to his bathrooms that are ADA compliant -- and therefore safer and more comfortable than usual bathrooms.

M

I loathe the process too
 

All of it, it is laborious. I am it a fan. The saving grace for me is that I have been trying this no shampoo trick so I wash my hair w conditioner once in a while. Daily shampooing is off the table. So I agree, taking out a step makes a difference. But then I get out of the shower and there is all that stuff to deal w, lotion, hair, moisturizer cleaning up the bathroom (squeegee shower). I totally agree. I am not one to glorify bath time, I get super antsy. I go thru all the prepping and then I have to bail out. I am glad some can get respite from that. I don't have any ideas, just want you to know I relate.

tree frog
 

Hi,

We live on the ground floor so we get creatures.

Friday I killed a spider.

During the night I noticed a little frog hopping from room to room. Once he was in a vulnerable place and I had decided he had spent enough time with me, I got a paper towel and took him outside.

He looked a little like this:
http://ufwildlife.ifas.ufl.edu/frogs...treefrog.shtml
Except that mine was smaller. (The picture has been enlarged.)
In the paper towel in my light grip he stretched out to two inches. (Yes I measured because I had my sewing kit and measuring tape nearby.)

'Weird to deal with him but he lives for now and he is gone. Hubby does not have to run across him and freak out.

Mari

Hi, TBI/PTSD

It is so weird that we have strategies. For all the work we put into washing, would could design bridges or invent a cheap way to create green electricity.
Oh, no! I do not clean up the bathroom. I get out of there as soon as I can.
You do so much more by drying the shower.
The hair stuff sounds like a hassle. I keep mine short, use a very gentle shampoo and thus have to skip the conditioner. I forgot about how much hassle that might be.

Do you really prep and then bail? Good for you. We should do what our bodies and our heads tell us.

Take care. I keep hoping that things get easier.

Mari

love frogs! loved your story!
 

LOL! I love froggies!!! :D:D:D

I am so glad you helped this li'l guy back outdoors, and pre-empted a hubby freakout (possibly involving frog damage). Good work, Mari! :)

And thank you for sharing. I am smiling at your cute story. I can just see you tape measuring a tiny frog on a paper towel.

waves

shower strategies
 

Yes, that is my idea of showering too. Cleaning the shower is a separate task by my books. Unfortunately, since I moved back in with the folks, I have to *HAVE* to clean the shower/bathroom up afterwards - this includes squeegying the tiles, scrubbing the tub, and scoot all the stuff back that I had to scoot out of my way to get into the shower. Sometimes I try to cheat and shower when mom is out. That way I can break down the shower into, scooting pre-task, shower task, cleaning task, and scooting post-task. That's 4 tasks for 1 shower, but I find it more doable, when I can get away with it. It isn't always possible to schedule around mom's absences.

Yeah, at times I get tempted to chop mine off because of the care involved. Mine tends to run on the dry side, so do I have to condition it with every wash.

TBI/PTSD, I thought your idea of washing with conditioner was cool! :D I would try it, too, except my scalp is sensitive to just about all conditioners - I apply it starting 1/3 to 1/2 way down the length of the hair and do not get any on my scalp. So I have to stick to shampoo.

On the other hand, I do not moisturize. I probably should but I can't be bothered... I only use skin lotions "PRN" ... at most. So I guess I get to save time there.

I've done that before also. There's just times where I set out to shower, and then don't make it. But if I stand a chance of making it, the prepping isn't really wasted. We have to try, right?

waves

It is OK Mari
 

You express yourself any way that you want Mari. It is OK to feel as you do.
I am not offended at all! I just wish the experience could be enjoyable for you as it is for me. I have a washer and dryer in my back bathroom. I place my music on top. It is far away from the water.
I hope you find some peace, where you are comfortable. Be good to yourself Mari. ginnie:hug:

Mari

I want the bar and things on the bathroom area. But I know
I better not suggest it. I will wait a little longer and see
if I can get my legs and ankles to get stronger.

Reason is my husband would not like the idea. And he would
have to do the work.

Donna:hug::grouphug:

I bought a bath stool at a yard sale and have he hand held shower head. Pain and just feeling overwhelmed to bath I opt to sit on he stool with the water running over me. A shower gel, sponge without shaving my legs. In the summer I will run the razor over really quick. My hair I ill say if I shower today tomorrow I will wash my hair.

Mari, we need to post our feelings, we all care even if we can't cure.
Hug
Di

Hi Donna
 

There are new bars for the bathroom, that take very little in the way of installation to put in. I did mine myself, and they are quite sturdy. You could do it yourself. They are available at most hardware stores, and Home Depot. I have two hand bars, and the one the shower is on. No problem not worry. Hope you can find something so Hubby doesn't have to do the work. ginnie:hug:

YOu don't have to respond mari,
just wanted to tell you that I appreciate your feelings about the showering. I take mine at night when I am not in a hurry to be anywhere. I have to really psyche myself up. I have a push button dispenser for my shampoo and soap, the conditioner one is broken so I just pour it out of the container.
I count out the number of pumps for the soap for different body parts. I always talk myself thru it....now wash this part then that part. I have to remind myself to do these steps because one time I forgot to rinse the conditioner out of my hair...I had to get back into the shower....what a hassle.....I am always afraid that I will run out of hot water.
I don't have these same issues about showering at the gym, endless hot water and clean towels....and I have sweat so there is no question that I need a shower.
If I go to the gym 3 times a week then I will have a shower and wash my hair 3 times a week. This is perfect.
If I don't go to the gym then I can go 5 days with out a shower... and my hair get so greasy looking that is what gets me in the shower is my hair!
bizi