computer screen
 

it can take now five or six minutes to get my computer screen on. not on the computer much. severely depressed and have no energy whats so ever. supposedly to go to the post office and get 23 dollars back but don't have the energy.I think the lack of energy is from the depression. tried to go to bed at eight. couldn't stand the depression.

sorry for you.....
frustrating about your monitor.
maybe you need a new one?
Bet they have come down in price.....
Maybe robert could help you get one and set it up for you?
When do you see your pdoc again?
maybe there is a new antidepressant on the market?
Would you be willing to try?
bizi
(((((HUGS)))))
bizi

i think it is the computer and not the monitor. the monitor works fine when it is on. it is getting it on that is so frustrating. I have tried so many antidepressants I haven't read of any new ones on the market. I would be afraid of a new one for fear of side effects that haven't been detected yet. Pudge still isn't eating normally and that is a big worry, I have no energy what so ever. I really think it is the depression. too much stress. i have nothing to look forward to. I am alone too much. Now the computer. I don't walk that well. I think a lot of it is my weight which hardly budges. I have been trying to skip supper.
bobby

Bobby

When was the last time you had your iron level checked. And some other
levels that have to do with energy. I realize it can be depression, but it
can also be other things.

When it comes to losing weight, I tried not eating too. I learned I did
and do much better because I eat food in small amounts 6 or 7 times
a day.

Donna :hug::grouphug:

thanks...what do you eat? i have a blood test on friday and tell him to take it
thanks a lot
bobby-i also have shortness of breath and slightly enlighted heart and leaky heart values.

I eat things like Cottage Cheese and salad a lot for lunch. And its not
unusual for me to use Cottage Cheese as a snack.

I also have crackers with peanut butter and granola bars for snacks.

I love ice cream, but I limit the amount of it because I would over eat.
So I try to have it only one or two times a week. As a treat snack.

I eat turkey, roast beef and ham a lot. But I enjoy going to Subway
at least a couple times a week. I then get like lettuce and onions on
the Ham and cheese Sub. There ham is all I like.

I've also been into bagels this last few weeks. But I only eat one a
day. Usually for one of my snacks. I eat potato bread mainly. But
only a slice or two a day, if even that.

I really eat pretty much anything I want. And just in smaller amounts
now.

Donna :hug::grouphug:

thanks...i would gain weight on that...i hardly move.
bobby

sorry about your commputer....:(
had this for lunch today
4oz of grilled salmon rare.
1 cup of collard greens cooked
cup of boiled beets
small yogurt and fruit parfait with granola on top of it(which I did not like)
Delicious!
bizi

my friend is coming over tomorrow to try to fix it...i set the power option on for five hours so it won't turn off. less frustrating.. i hope that doesn't make the problem go away when he comes over.
i had too much watermelon-i have been too frustrated. now i feel sick to my stomach. I made it to the post office. that was my travel. they have fish on wed and fridays at the senior salad but i don't like fish so i get salad...today was turkey salad....so so-pudge was on the bed. i haven't seen her eat. then tiramisu came over and lay next to pudge. after a few minutes pudge moved...so it goes
I just remembered the first time i went to europe it was from may to september...what a trip....young and full of energy and it was so cheap and no lines.

Depression saps energy for sure. You need to have a long talk with your pdoc and be honest about everything. Maybe he should be moving antidepressant doses rather than risperdal…. IDK he has to know everything so he can make the right decision.

If your vitamin B12 is low that could be contributing to your lack of energy as well. That's something well worth checking. Talk to your doctor about your lack of energy and ask him to run some labs… he will know what to look for.

I wish you were feeling better Bobby :hug::hug::hug:

I am glad that you have some friends to help you.
((((HUGS)))))
bizi

I will be honest with him. I do take 5000 mg of b12 for my pernicious anemia.
I take seraline and welbutrin. I am only taking one risperdal now...My sleeping is so poor. So many things stressful and sad things have happened this year. I just called my cousin and found out his sound has brain cancer. It never ends.
bobby

robert is a technical genius...within a minute he showed me how the air conditioner works with the fan. what a difference. I thought it was defective.
then within three minutes he figured out it was the monitor and went home and got a spare one. It is really nice to have friends but to have technical geniusues in this age is something else.
bobby

I'm glad you have Robert for all that stuff.

And I'm happy to hear that you're going to lay it all on the table for your pdoc.

It has been a very hard year for you :hug::hug::hug:

robert also alway brings over mickey the super dog. I cuddled with him for fifteen minutes when robert when home to get his monitor. I am really blessed to have robert as a friend. I also like to see the way he figures out computer problems. It seems as if he knows everything. I didn't tell him i bought a printer because I thought it was unfixable. sure enough i had dropped a pen in it and tried to blame a cat. I shook the printer and didn't hear anything so i assumed nothing fell in. I am embarrassed to tell him that i am getting a new printer. He approved of the new monitor i am getting.
bobby

i don't know what to say to the doctor. within a day i can be so depressed and then okay without anything happening. I don't want to tell him that i think of death a lot. I would never do anything but i still don't want him to know.
Once again I am going to start reading the regency historical fiction. they are a big waste of time but maybe i can get my concentration back and start reading and swearing off cnn. it is as if i am punishing myself by the amount of time i spend listening to cnn, I didn''t realize they were so bias too.
bobby

yes do something that interests you and that you enjoy. Have you ever thought about taking on line classes?
bizi

i take the religious classes twice a week and next semester i think i will sign up for three a week. I am tired a lot and my concentration hasn't been good. right now i am trying to read a book and i seem to stop almost every half an hour.
I try to take a nap but can't. If only i could sleep better. sleeping pills never worked.
bobby

Not sleeping is so hard....I wish you slept better.
benadryl worked for me for 2 years then stopped so now I take klonipin to sleep works pretty good!
((((hugs))))
bizi

Many people with depression think about death often and pdocs understand the difference between thinking about death and being suicidal very well, so please don't worry about that.

I think it would be helpful for you to write down how you feel for your pdoc. None of us feel the same way every day. I'm sure that how you feel every day is very different depending on your anxiety level. Sometimes notes really help me with my neurologist.

The major news networks are biased. I either watch news or cartoons. A big difference, I know. Reading familiar books has always been something comforting for me, but I have trouble reading now, too. I like the idea of classes, religious classes :hug:

I'm glad that you are getting your new monitor and Robert approves of your choice. You can just tell him that while you were shopping for monitors, you decided it was time for a printer upgrade, too ;)

Bobby

I think you also can relate all the thinking of death to those who have
died in your life in the last year. Even to an extent the celebrities that
have died.

I think your pdoc would get that and help work with you.

Donna :hug::grouphug:

that is a really good observation. i don't feel as badly. I still haven't mourned abby. tears come to my eyes but stop. I seem to block thinking what she looked like. It is way too painful. I hope i can mourn soon instead of denying it all.
bobby

I remember crying when my mother was sick, but couldn't cry after she passed away. Crying is a very rare occurrence for me now.

Sometimes I have a hard time remembering what my lost loved ones looked like, and it bothers me too, but most of them were lost many years ago.

The process of grieving is specific to every individual and to each loss. Denial is a step in the process and serves the important purpose of protecting us when we're vulnerable and aren't able to deal with our feelings (I'm a big fan of it). You may still be in denial over Abby's loss because you haven't worked through the loss of others yet and can't handle it :hug::hug::hug:

People can move in and out of denial as needed.

I think you will accept things when you are a little stronger and you have had a little more time to deal with everything that has happened over the last year :hug::hug::hug: