I have gotten old fast
 

I signed up at dorot where I take my classes over the phone to have a rosh hashanah(sp) dinner brought to me with a friendly visitor. they asked if there were ever bed bugs in the building and i goofed and said yes but not for five or six years. the woman said I needed a note from the management saying there weren't there anymore. then I said can we forget I said it. It was at least 5 years ago and it is a new super and new management. she said she will find out. rats I said they were on the fourth floor and I am on the 18 floor.
she said I can ask the friendly visitor questions about themselves since I like to talk about mental stuff or right now north korea lol

Wow, Bobby.

Was the woman being helpful?


M

the woman was stereotypical nice person who spoke with an educated voice and was thrown off when I mentioned north korea-she obviously blocks unpleasantness lol
can you believe I did it. I never celebrate Jewish holidays and always spend them by myself.

This is wonderful!
Maybe you could find a sader(not sure how you spell that) dinner to go to?
Is there a synagogue near you?
((((HUGS)))))
bizi

yes but you have to join and i don't fit in

Some people go only once a year.


Anyway, people are nice on holidays.


M

I wasn't raised in a traditional family. I went to a private school where there was only one other jew in my class.I have never fit in. after my explosion when i was 35 I was afraid of life and afraid of death. I became friendly with a much younger Jewish orthodox Jew and boy did we talk. I had studied the I Ching and she said my beliefs were like orthodoxy. that is how I got into Judaism. She is still one of my very best friends and lives in Israel now and has cancer. This is the first time I reached out for a dinner.

I don't want to go to temple. I would feel out of place. I don't feel out of place reading spiritual books and listening to lectures. I am not a ritual Jew

Thank you for that link, Bobby. I enjoyed reading it. I really like the idea about the 2 suitcases. I found it comforting.

I'm sure not growing up going to temple or knowing someone who goes to one makes it hard to start up. I think I would be very uncomfortable, too. I'm glad you find comfort in God, and are happy with the way you practice your religion now.
I didn't know that you and Suri had been friends for so long. I hope she is doing okay :hug::hug::hug:

I think having a "friendly visitor" deliver you dinner on Rosh hashanah would be nice. I suppose getting that letter about the past bug problem could be a pain, but I hope you either don't need it or it's easy to get.

I kinda got a chuckle when you mentioned you dropped the topic of North Korea on her. I suppose she was taken off guard... keep them on their feet, Bobby! :)

I gave the wrong impression. My parents sent me to sabbath school and I was confirmed but I didn't fit in. the girls wore fancy dresses and I wore simple ones. I was the frog and didn't belong to a click. I protested against going to the conservative school because it was too much. I regret it now because I would have learned hebrew. I had an awful time. The rabbi was pompous. My one friend who I am still friends with and didn't fit in used to tie knots in prayer books during the sermon to see who would win. It was a tie. what painful memories. I buried them.

Dear Bobby,
 

Lots of sadness

I know you know that it is not your fault and that you did nothing
wrong.
I am saying it again.

--=-=-=-=-==--=-=



This quote is from Ted Roosevelt but it is not corny.
It is pretty much what most of us do:
Do what you can, with what you have, where you are. Theodore Roosevelt
Read more at: Do what you can, with what you have, where you are. - Theodore Roosevelt - BrainyQuote
My mother used to say some version of that.

I am not sure that this is Oprah but it kind of works (Maybe Maya Angelou):
“When you know better...You do better.”

=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
Somedays I worry that I am not doing my best.
BUT that is because days and years vary.
I do what I can.
Somedays I cannot do anything and so I don't.
Somedays I push myself a little or a lot.

I suppose I have low expectations but
on work days I feel like I did great if I
got dressed and look mostly ok
got out of the door on time and drove safely.


Anyway, I do not want to derail what you are trying to say here.

I too have been rethinking my decisions and trying to figure
out where I took the wrong turn (or two).
I narrowed down a few choices but I was against strong forces
so those were good decisions at the time to save myself.


Sorry that I may have gotten off track.


M

just right!

I really appreciate the thought and sentiment that went into that post, Mari. Thank you for that :hug::hug::hug: