What do YOU do when there is really Nothing you WANT to do??
 

I googled this question and came up with this. The closest thing I could to what I am actually feeling. I am NOT unhappy, I get a little lonely sometimes but daily, I do O.K.

http://ask.metafilter.com/84087/What...lly-want-to-do

Of course this guy is 23 and Most of what he says doesn't apply to an Older person like myself but some of it does.

I find that if I make a list of things I Should do, I rarely do them all in the specifide time I give myself. I used to do in One day what it takes me a week to do nowand I really Don't Care either when I don't get everything done. Which is Very ODD for me.

I talked to a friend in her 70's and she said that as we age our priorities shift. I have no big plans, I never did. Life just sort of Happened TO me. I dealt with things I NEVER wanted to have to deal with. I feel like the life I have lived is NOT the life I wanted eventhough I really HAD no big plans.

Anyone else feel like this? :o

Sometimes..Sort of..How's that for an answer? :o

I had plans..Not BIG plans by most people's standards, I suppose, but still..I feel fortunate to have accomplished them up to this point..It's the "where do I go from here" I haven't quite answered yet. Depression isn't a big problem, I'm pretty happy overall, but I don't want to let myself get too "comfortable", if you know what I mean. Just because I have this ridiculous disease doesn't mean I have to stop making plans. I may have to revise those plans occasionally, but then I had to do that even before MS, so that's not new.

Back to your original question..What do I do when there's really nothing I WANT to do? I guess I take my time, do a few small things, and give thought to where I want to go from here. If I figure out where that is, I'll be posting it here! :D

interesting question, it seems like I never have free time always something to do,

but what do you do when you dont want to do anything,

i guess i crash out or zone out at history channel

like i said occasionally i couch potato it and find its good for the soul to zone out once in a while, interesting question Wiix

Thanks both of you for giving Some kind of answer. This is a Simple question but NOT an easy question. As far as "Zoning Out". I think I already AM in a constant state of Zone Out to begin with. I am in my own little world here. I go for months sometime Years without having any kind of Real life Human interaction aside from the cashier at the grocery or the desk clerk at the library and I don't seem to care.

Do we reach a point in our lifes when we've DONE everything we are going to do and there is nothing left to want because everything we had is gone and there is NO chance in Hell of anything New coming into our life??

Do we reach a point where there is no point to wanting anything or needing anyone or caring about anything?? I don't even CARE what I eat anymore. I just grab anything that's here and sometimes I don't even go BUY food when I need to. The laundry piles up, I don't care, Screw it, I say some days. I am not mad or upset about anything. I don't want to do anything or go anywhere or try to think of anything to do. Do we get to a point when all the things we liked are DONE. Any possibility of anything happening to make a change doesn't really matter, I'm just Tired of everything. I keep thinking about my family that is Gone, a daughter I will never see again because of her mental problems, a grand daughter who I haven't seen in 5 years, growing up without a "Na", that's what she called me. I would Like to see her or talk with her on computer but last time that was possible my daughter screwed THAT up. She is my Only blood relative alive and we have Nothing and no possibility of anything, Ever.

Is this what getting old IS? I have no one to ask or talk to about it. My sister lost her husband last year and I think she is going soon now too. I EMailed her a few months ago and she never replied. It seems any and all efforts I made at Anything, come to Nothing, No Reply. I don't WANT to be depressed, I don't FEEL depressed, I feel like I am actually seeing things as they truely ARE. Am I going to go on for the rest of my life like this??

I HAVE religion, my own version of what I think God is and I do talk to God sometimes. I ask what to do next, I ask for answers, I get nothing. How can a person in a world with Billions of people feel so isolated and alone? Am I a Freak?? I just don't know anymore, maybe I am. http://neurotalk.psychcentral.com/im...nsb/tongue.gif

Hi Wiix, I am sorry to read your post about what life has dealt you up to now. This may sound preachy but I am going to throw it out there anyway.

You say you have your religion and talk to God sometimes. Talk to Him more. And listen more, this was hard for me.

Try to find a good welcoming church (you may have to visit several till you find the one that fits) and open yourself up to making new friends. You will be surprised to find that there are others that are also looking for someone to laugh and just be happy with.

God has done some amazing things in my life in the last year and when I read your post I could relate so much but that was then and this is now. I hope you find some meaning and more importantly that human interaction that means so much. ...Sue

Hey Wiix .. I definitely know where you are coming from ... and I agree with Snoozie, BGB, Frank and Polar ..

I use to go a 100mph a day ... and still have more on my to-do list ... I would keep adding and adding .. and do them ... then I got MS (or had it - and it finally said, ENOUGH!)

this last year was tough - trying to figure out what to do ... then around christmas time, I decided that no one is going to tell me what to expect - so now I can do what I want and no one can say 'didly-squat' .. when someone says something, I just tell them that this is how I'm handling my dx - and doing okay.

be GOOD to yourself .. I decided to return back to school (online) to finish my masters ... and been enjoying the camaraderie with participating with others (as I enjoy this site) ...

doesn't matter how old you are - start a new project, take a class that peaks your interest - read a new novel from the library.. then write a book review and send it to local small newspapers (they are always looking for new news) ...

you don't have to prove anything to anyone ... when you go to the library, check out the DVD movie: Facing the Giants .. it helped me to get a new perspective on life ... and it's all good ..

I agree with everyone's suggestions. It's hard to try and find a "purpose" some days. Since I do not work any longer it's up to me to find things to do to fill them.

I've found that volunteering and/or helping someone else is a great way to feel better and make a difference in someone else's quality of life at the same time.

I tend to analyze things a lot.....like on days when I feel a little down or I'm missing my family members who've passed on I'll sit and watch my bird feeders in the back yard. All kinds of birds and critters come to eat - including a few bunnies and a whole assortment of birds. It never fails - when I'm feeling low a bright red cardinal will come and sit on my porch railing. I take that as a sign from my Dad that everything will be OK. The other evening I was missing my sister terribly and a bunny hopped up to the edge of the storage barn and started eating some of the sunflower seeds I had put out. My sister loved rabbits and collected porceline figurines of them. I took that as a sign from her that life goes on and I will be OK. Then....I burned a pan of dressing and took that as a sign from my mother that I'll never be as good of a cook as she was!!! :D We used to have some good laughs in the kitchen when she was here with us.

It's normal to feel sadness and lonliness. If we didn't we wouldn't be human. I just tend to take it one day at a time, do what I feel like I can do, and always remember that there is someone I can help regardless of what my own circumstances are.

:hug::hug:

When I started this thread yesterday, I WAS in pretty BAD shape. Today was a little better. Those TERRIBLE days come, usually when I have done too much physically the day before. I just don't have the energy I used to or the strength. I did today what I Couldn't DO yesterday because I just didn't have the physical strength to. I did what Needed doing today, 2 sinksful of dishes, a little vacuuming around my desk but I still haven't cleaned up the Damned laundry all over the place, maybe toninght I will just say "I'll give it 15 minutes of sorting and folding and putting stuff when it needs to be. I think that'd at Least make a dent in the Avalanche. ;) I will give it a whole hearted effort tonight.

I get so tired and I can't sleep. I just lay there until 4 or 5 and see it start to get light out. I then fall asleep. I have only EVER lost a night's sleep once and I was so dizzy the next day I was falling down all over the place. That was when my daughter was an infant. I think it is the Epilepsy. I was only diagnosed with it about 10 years ago. I KNEW something wasn't right, I mean, in my head. Visual distubances, audio distubances, balance problems, dizziness. I have Always been like this even as a kid.

Going out around people in crowds as in church is not an option. I get sick easily and stay sick for months. I have a Terrible immune system. I HAVE tried over and over and over again but each time I got sick it got worse and worse. Two years ago it almost killed me. I can be with a one or two people at a time and they CAN'T be sick or I catch it. Please don't try to tell me to keep doing that. At this point in my life I think I KNOW what happens to me when I go out around crowds. It has been a life long problem. I remember my mother yelling at me because I was sick and my husband making me fell guilty everytime I got sick. This trickled down to my daughter too. I have always been sickly. It's terrible not being able to breathe and having someone yelling at you while you are coughing up blood. I think I have had the Worst people in my life. I said that to my sister once and she got mad. I told her I had the Wrong family. I was the baby and no one was there for me. Everyone was off doing their own thing. I do believe I was just a throw away child. Now I am just a throw away grown up.

I am not sad about this revelation. I just wish I could have understood all this a long time ago and not been so understanding of others Always putting me last. I have never been a demanding person, I just wanted what was rightfully mine and never got it. I feel very cheated. I don't hurt anymore about it. I think my heart is finally grown calloused but I still DO Love my animals. They were always there when no human was. Maybe I need a new pet. I just lost one a few weeks ago, he died but I still have his mate, a female iguana, that I Love dearly. :hug: I can talk to her about this problem but I don't get any answers. :p BUT she is a Very Good Listener. :winky:

Yea, I know, it's Very limiting. Ihave to either work out alone in my house OR go for a walk OUTSIDE by myself. It's hard to find a walking buddy.

I think I came to a conclusion this morning about my mental state. I think what is going on with me is an old term "BURN OUT". I can hear Kramer on Seinfeld, in my head saying "I'm Burned Out Man, I Need my massage!" A massage WOULD be so nice but recently have been out of my price range. I used to get them almost every week when I was married, I NEEDED them along with a subtantial amount of alcohol to put up with the JERK. After 13 years of HIM, anyone would be Burned Out. I wanted OUT after 5 years but THOUGHT things would get better if I stayed, BIG MISTAKE!! It almost ended with a Murder, MINE. :o

I am going to make a list of things that I Should do today and if I get them done, well, good for me. :winky: Me First though. Long, hot shower, a nice breakfast, some Irish tea and something Sweet. :hug: Maybe TRY to get out in the sun for a bit.

Actually just talking about all this with you wonderful, sensitive people IS helping me feel SO much better.

Unless YOU have actually experienced the "Going out to be with people then getting SICK for MONTHS because of it" Syndrome, you really can't understand the total feeling of Hopelessness. I used to have a lot of friends as a teen but my Mother interfered with everyone of them and I lost all my friends. Friends I should be able to have contact NOW with but I have No idea where they are anyway. But that ship has sailed. I think about how I would like to go to a museum or live theatre or a Festival but first off I don't like going alone and second I don't KNOW anyone who would go with me and third, I'd Probably end up sick and is it worth it? :( Kind of a Dead End, isn't it?

Yes, I know what you mean about just keeping up with what needs doing in the house is such a chore sometimes, no MOST of the time. It's just OLD. I've done everything THOUSANDS of times already, it has JUST lost it's charm. :o Pleasure from just doing simple things is eluding me these days.

I also had a sister but she was 13 years older than me and she left home when I was 5 so I really have no memory of her and I as siblings. My Mother had 7 pregnacies but only 4 children, me being the last one born but she was TIRED and Worn out by then and really sort of pawned me off to neighbors and friends most of the time. She worked and travelled a lot so I hardly ever saw her. I don't remember any "Tender" times with her. I think I was just in her way and a bother. she didn't want me. she SAID she did but her actions told me otherwise. Yet when I had My daughter she was right there for HER. Which upset me tremendously to see her doing things for her that she never did for me and pushing me aside during the whole thing. My mother was NOT very nice to me at all. I will NEVER get over it either.

When I don't have anything to do, I'm usually on the net or one of the rooms. Thats why I asked, how come no one hardly goes in the chat rooms :(

I found something recently that is kind of fun, name pictures for Google. It's fun when you first begin but you do run out of ideas after a while but you can always go back again when you are rested: http://images.google.com/imagelabeler/

I just read the posts by Wiix & Baxter. Wiix, I have epilepsy. Do you know or think you do? Either way, you should see your neurologist. Maybe he can find a certain thing that needs looking at, to help you 'feel better' and you then can try different meds to help you. Also, I know what it's like to 'not have a mom'. My mom died of cancer 3 months before my 9th birthday. But perhaps you'd say it's worse to have a mom who doesn't seem to care. I was too embarrassed to ask my dad 'girl stuff' & a mom coulda helped. All sorts of little things. When I was going to get married, so was my GF. Her, her mom & I went to the bridal salon when she tried on her dress, when she was putting it on & said "Here mom, hold my watch" I started to cry cuz I knew I'd never be saying that to my mom. I'm home alone alot too. (BTW, I'm 50) Mostly my kids are at school, work or out w/friends and I can't look forward to my DH coming home cuz many times he is out of town. (June 2 he starts his longest trip....till mid. Sept. Only able to come home every other weekend.) I don't drive & as I said, my kids are usually not home to take me places. So I go without. I too am close my one of my dogs. One mostly lays on the coach all day but my other one is great. She is so soft, like my big live stuffed animal. I talk to both of them too. I had a terrible ache in my head & it hurt so much, they looked & knew something was wrong, your pets can 'read you'. Cheer up hun.

Thanks lor. Meet me in the chatroom, ok?

LOL! I can just see you watching Pirates of the Caribbean. :D

Life happens as it will.

We can exercise, travel, make plans, have an agenda...etc and so forth BUT we don't have total control over the way things play out.

Having said that we do have some control which is up to us to exercise it.

As to life not always playing out as you want; I don't think that's all that unusual.

My mom said, after my dad passed on, "where did all those years go to? It seems like just yesterday that we began our lives together".

Time is what we have on our hands today and tomorrow. It is not easily understood as we look back. So we look ahead, taking the lessons we remember from the past along with us.

Doesn't all the life you lead in the past seem small when you try to measure it:rolleyes:.

Live each day for the day it is. The 'rest of your life' is what happens from this moment on. Look for interesting things that you enjoy and if it's not housekeeping than do the minimum and get to the stuff you like.

Tootsie:)

No, not really. I was thinking about this today Toots. When parts of you life are OVER and done with and it didn't turn out so well and all you are left with are th things people have said to and about you and you were SO wrapped up in THAT, never realizing the Big Picture and what all that was happening was just AWFUL. Now this just wasn't once or twice but a series of events that occurred STEMMING from ONE Bad event. It's really true that one BAD choice, but in my case it was more like I had Trust in people I shouldn't have, can RUIN your life.

My daughter and I have no contact now and it really does bother me. She was just another link in the chain, the initial link started WAY before I was even born with my mother and her mother and probably her mother before that. It seems that the Mothers and Daughters in my family always HAVE had Serious issues. The ***** landed on me and I really had No control of any of it. My daughter was also part of it. She resents me because she saw what it was doing to me but she didn't understand. She only saw what affected her. She didn't realize she was watching my destruction and only cared about how it affected her. I was DROWNING and I need help but got none. If ONE person in my family had just given me a little help things would have turned out differently but instead it was just the opposite. They contributed to my destruction.

It's been almost 20 years since it all ended and I am still trying to get over it all. It's been ONLY in the past year that I have been able to fall alseep WITHOUT locking my bedroom door.

When I read these words I realize how devoid of "Self" I am and always have been. I was constantly demeaned by a controlling, domineering and inconsiderate and unloving Mother who made sure anything that could make me happy was quickly stripped away from me. By the time my daughter was born, I had even lost my ability to dream. I had no agenda. I learned that anything I could or would want would Never happen and I was berated for even wanting. I don't want anything, even now.

Well, talking about all that helped. I know I haven't been in this thread in a while but I seem to be doing a little better. I needed to calm down. I find I get so wound up with myself that I turn into a nervous wreck and wear myself out. Then I can't sleep and little things loom Very Large in my mind. I have been trying to sleep more. I mean take more naps, TRY to doze off earlier at night and stay in bed later in the morning and hopefully get a bit more sleep and it seems to be helping.

Plus during the day I don't make ridiculously long lists of things I MUST get done that day. I stick to one or two of the things I really should do and that is working out much better. I don't know why I am so hard on myself. It's just ME here. I don't have to Prove anything to anyone. :o Things get done. Even if it's a few days or a week later it still gets done.

Plus the fact I've been dabbling in a little more "Chocolate" lately. ;) :D That seems to help. :wink:

((((wiix))))

there you have it. the perfect answer. just eat chocolate. works for me. :D

((((((((Curious)))))))))!!!!!! http://bestsmileys.com/lol/5.gif