Those of you who no longer drive...
 

Just wondering. Those of you who are no longer able to drive, how do you get where you want/need to go? Does a family member drive you? If so, does he/she live with you?

Do you take public transportation? Do friends or service groups give you rides?

Did you have to move when you became unable to drive?

Driving is not a problem for me, but it's always that little black cloud hovering on the horizon. I usually keep my back turned, but it's always there.

During my last flare I was not able to drive as well as the fact that they thought I was having seizures. I have to say it was very difficult and I felt like a hermit. I had to rely on my girls, parents, and DBF to take me where I needed to go. It was really hard on me.

I am hopeful that I am being proactive enough to avoid ever having this happen. I do not like to be dependent. It gives me more reason to put up a good fight.

My mom is going through this right now. She said it is the hardest part of her illness. Even the brain surgery can't compare to having to ask people to take you somewhere she said. Even though everyone wants to help, she hates asking.

I hope it never happens to you or anyone. I am Jim's driver but he can still drive if he chooses to. Right now he just drives on occasion and if an emergency happens.

Right now I don't drive because of my right hand/arm and vision issues. I have driven to the drugstore which is just right around the corner - I don't have to get out on any main roads - but other than that I don't drive. I've even started making lists and sending the boys to the grocery store for me. Big time grocery shopping requires one of them to go with me. I go for days at a time without going anywhere. I do go outside - onto my back porch - but other than that I'm pretty much stuck here at home.

I can still drive but it is difficult and scary at times. I never know when my vision will go blurry and my depth perception is usally bad. There's enough to deal with in Houston traffic that will make a person crazy, I don't need to add to it! lol

Most of the time I will just stay around the area and have learned some of the short cuts through subdivisions etc...usually though the only time I'm in a car is if dh or someone else is driving.

I miss it, being able to open the sun roof, cranked the radio and just go without worrying if I'll remember how to get back home! (Plus I don't feel as safe being by myself as I used to.)

My husband is my chauffer. I havent really driven anywhere in a year. I sold my car and got a hunk of junk.

I think I am ready to get back out there. I am getting the itch.

Neighbors are always asking if they can get me something or take me somewhere. I am very blessed.

Dear B2Y,
 

This is a scary thought always hiding in a rain cloud overhead. And it can be a reality without warning. I'm not driving this week, as I'm in an exaserbation and having trouble with overall leg and arm control. My dhubby drives, but I've been hiding at home so I don't have to try to walk in front of people. I'm going to think positive that this will pass. But I know in reality, there may be a time when it might not pass. I don't know what I would do without my dh. B ut, it's still a feeling of lost independence, not being able to just to jump in the car and run to the store myself. I HATE IT!:(

But, just try to stay positive. I have blessings everyday to be thankful for.:p

Thanks for yor post.:hug: It's nice to have people to talk to about things on our minds!

In 2006, I chose not to renew my DL..:( I hated like he!! to do it, but I really hadn't done much driving since DH died in 2004, anyway.

I still have my minivan w/scooter and will travel...LOL, but DD or DSS or DSIL take me to where have to go. I have no pleasure trips anymore. I'm the only one who has the time for that..:rolleyes:

Like you all, I just loved to jump into my car and take off on a whim..:) You guys are in your 30s, 40, and 50s and having trouble driving, so I'm lucky, I guess, that I could still drive, into my 60s.

I'm in the position, as so many of you, and hate to ask anyone to take me anywhere, although many offer. Sometimes I hate my life, but most of the time, am content to be a hermit.:cool:

I hope it's a long time before you all have to give up driving. It's that last shot of independence, we just don't want to give up.....but, sometimes, we owe it to the other drivers on the road, to quit, while we're ahead..:D:D

:grouphug:

When the ON hit me, I still drove. I found out very soon that closing my eye or putting on an eye patch stopped the vertigo and dizziness cold. I did have depth perception issues, but worked my way through them, and adjusted my way of driving ( slower, more careful, look twice, take side roads, etc)

I may be in a little different driving situation than most of you. I can drive 25 miles to work and not see another vehicle. It's VERY quiet here most of the year. The summer gets busy, but for the most part, no traffic at all.

I DO have a backup driver if need be. My fiance does drive, but not very well! :eek: He scares the heck out of me! More often than not, I drive when we go somewhere.

If and when it comes down to it, I won't drive, but I don't even want to think of that happening.:( I have become more of a homebody in the past few years, but when I want to go, I want to be able to go without any hassle!!

I have always been a nervous passenger because I only trust my driving. Since the MS got bad, I am a VERY nervous passenger, and will drive most times to avoid that stress.

I don't go far any more, and if there is a need to get the kids to somewhere further then about 15 min away, I arrange transport with a friend. I tend to be the designated driver for all the more local travel though, so I pay those parents back when I have to do the midnight pick-ups and 6:00 am drop-offs. Good thing I can sleep any time I want, cause I am awake running them around at some pretty bizarre hours (team sports, etc.).

I have not been able to drive at times, especially when I am in a bad attack. To be honest, I am so oblivious to the world at that time, I don't know or care about whether things are getting done. Somehow it does though . . . apparently. :D

Cherie

lol, Cherie !! me too...

WHY is there no BRAKE pedal on the floor of the front passenger-seat ??

a steering wheel would be nice as well.

I'm thinking, like, the way small planes have TWO sets of controls, for pilot and copilot... that'd work for me !

see, MS and control issues don't go well together...

and my propensity for backseat driving doesn't go well with my vision issues either.

all joking aside, at this point (20 years, 4 months of MS) it's definitely LESS stress for me to just be passenger, however nervous.

I pray, practice slow deep breathing, and force myself to look out the SIDE window, at the view (instead of visually concentrating on the road, attempting to keep the vehicle where I want it, solely with EYE POWER)

when my symptoms are acting up, and my self-control is less rigorous, I just opt to stay at home, so I won't turn into a NAG, or a whimpering basket case.

it's not that my husband's driving is bad (he's actually quite good, just goes a little faster than I would)

it's the potholed ROADS here, the pedestrians, bicyclists, motorcycles, dogs, etc.

the roads are narrow, mostly unpaved, and constantly have dogs, chickens, and children crossing.

the bikes have NO headlights, reflectors, or mirrors, and bicyclists have had no safety courses, and don't wear helmets... they ride double all the time, and sometimes with children.

pickup truck beds are OFTEN filled with half-a-dozen (or more!) people, sitting, and even STANDING.

driver training here is minimal, and I think I've seen police patrolling maybe ONCE in three years.

AND, the "rules of the road" here are different, one pulls to the RIGHT, and STOPS before making a left turn (the roads are too narrow for center-waiting)

and there's charming things like one-way bridges with NO visibility of oncoming traffic:

http://img48.imageshack.us/img48/4817/sideimg18kf2.jpg

traffic accidents are the 4th leading cause of death in Belize.

I still drive but only in the local area. The farthest I drive is about
20 miles and that is because it is a drs. appt.

Most of the time I go with a friend or DD.

Each day is so different as you know,that most of the time I am
at home being a hermit.

When DH was alive, there was no problem I went with him.

Now I have been having more flares closer together that I am even
nervous to drive local.

I pray the day will never come that I can't drive myself at all. That
little bit of independence to know I can just go to the local store is letting
me keep my sanity.

Jappy :grouphug:

About three years ago the neuropsychologist suggested I might consider giving up driving in about three years.

I quit (more or less) then. Since I had recently separated I didn't have a vehicle anyway.

Public transportation to the grocery store and back. Means more trips than with a car but safer.

http://www.nugget.ca/ArticleDisplay.aspx?e=1063219

When in doubt - don't.

Thanks Cricket, but, of course, that accident could have happened to anyone, and I would not let it stop me from driving, if I was sure of my ability to do so, safely.

Having said that, I have to admit, there were times, when I drove, only to realize, while I was behind the wheel, that I wasn't 100%....either, in the earlier years, b/c I had a drink that went straight to my head or, in the later years, b/c of a MS symptom that arose.In both of those instances, I gingerly, got myself and my loaded vehicle, slowly and safely, home. :eek:

In the later years, with my MS getting worse, I didn't drive much at all and not long distances, b/c, I knew that an MS SX could arise at anytime. I would not drive, at all, if I was having any MS SX, before getting into the car/van.

When It came time, in 2006, to renew my DL, I hadn't been driving for nearly 2 years, so chose not to renew. I was 65, at the time. It's a P.I.T.A, but safer for all.:p

This is a choice for every individual to make on his/her own and we all know, in our hearts and minds, when the time has come, to stop driving...MS or no MS..:cool:

The BMV will give a driver's license to just about anyone, so it's up to us to know when........

Yup....it's a real bummer!!!! Especially so for any of you in your "younger" years who can no longer drive. I was fortunate in that I was able to drive into my sixties. Ouch! Every time I write or say that "s" word, I can't believe it pertains to me!!!!!

As I posted a while ago, I've sold my car and now have no vehicle. For doctor appointments, my two friends or daughter-in-law drive me. And yes, I'm a nervous Nellie too -- always wanted to be in control. They also shop for me, pick up stuff at the drug store, even go to the bank for me. Now that the spasticity has gotten so bad in my legs, it's almost impossible to get into a car let alone use the pedals. The fatigue is so horrible that just getting dressed and ready to go is a major operation. Going "out" isn't fun anymore.

I'm sure a few years ago this would have been a traumatic event -- not driving -- but since I've been to Walmart only ONCE this past year and out to dinner a couple times, I've gotten used to being a house plant. Just another thing MS has taken away and something else to wrap our brain around (such as it is). I pray all you "youngin's" will keep going......and going.......and going. Take care!:)

I'm really appreciating all the responses so far and your willingness to share.

One of my neighbors asked me recently, "So how long are they going to let you keep driving?" I stood there with my mouth open for a few seconds, then said something clever like "Uh...my driving is fine, thank you."

And it is. Fatigue is a big problem, so I plan well. My "trips" are early in the day, and if I have to go very far I stay overnight. I do NOT do well in heavy, fast traffic, so I avoid it. I get off the interstate and go around major merge in/merge out spots, especially at busy times of day.

Other than that, my eyesight is fine, reflexes good, no trouble moving my foot from gas to brake. (It's my left leg that is giving me trouble)

I have always been a white-knuckle passenger, and dread the possibility of not being able to drive myself. My husband gave up his license several years ago, my daughter is moving a couple hours away, and I might (might) ride with my son in an emergency, such as I was bleeding from a major artery.

I'm not a city girl, but I guess I need to look at the possibility of relocating, if necessary, to where there is public transportation.

I know I can't cross the bridge until I come to it, but I like to do a little advance planning--how high and wide is the bridge, etc. The day might never come, or not for many years, but I'd like to get my mind wrapped around the idea just in case, and it helps to know how others cope.

I know what you mean, B2Y. My oldest son drives like a maniac! He's a police officer.....and still drives like he's chasing someone on his "off" days! I don't like riding with him. Last time I rode with him I kept my head down so I couldn't see the road. He asked me "are you praying?". I said "yeah!". :o

I have not driven in 3 years, took myself off road so no one else could and retain my license for picture ID and "in case". Being PPMS know it won't get better but drove until my 50s. DH takes me places and DD and DS got their licenses and DD knows you just have to make a roadtrip spur of the moment sometimes to CVS or to get chocolate items at certain places. DH built me a ramp to pool and a sidewalk to gate and car, but to fit in space allowed ramp is twice as steep as ADA says!! Makes an exciting trip down. AAAAAAHHH!!!
Luckily have a powerchair, pushing me up in a manual might kill them. Not driving is a big loss to me, but for the safety of others, needed to be done.

Dennis drives me everywhere. He's very good about it, but I do wish I didn't have to rely on him so much. I think one of the things that bothers me most is the little things, like running out for milk. Or, if I'm in the middle of cooking a nice suprise dinner for him after a hard day of work and its put on hold because I suddenly realize I didn't have as much flour as I thought. I can't just run out for it, I won't have dinner ready and on the table for him like I wanted. He, of course doesn't mind, but it's those little things that really get to me.

So, get this. While I was at the mobility place getting Jim's ramp fixed the mechanic comes in and asks "So, Jim hit any bean fields lately? If you guys remember, when Jim was able to drive again after four years, his hand control got caught and he coasted towards a bean field. lol

I still haven't told Jim that he said that. He (Jim) says I will never let him forget that. Gotta keep him on his toes right?

my DH takes me where I need to go. He does most of the shopping now who would ever think I would look forward to grocery shopping, but I miss it now). Friends and family also drive me where we need to go. I used to walk a lot of places, but this has stopped now that I am less mobil leg/feet wise. I miss the freedom evey once in a while like when I wnt to go somewhere and my husband says later or tomorrow. I can't reqlly blame him as all he does is drive lately, but that 5y/o part of e wants what I want now:D

I miss driving and I really hate feeling like I have to give a good reason why I no longer have a real license. For example when a check out girl asks for my license. I have a DMV issued ID card, but often they hand it back and ask for a driver's license. The whole line of people now looks at me - I feel like a drunk who got her license "pulled" for being a bad girl. I usually try and explain that I have a medical reason for not driving.

Wow, I'm impressed with your local chapter!

ME TOO!!! Nothing like that going on at our money hungry chapter.:rolleyes:

Same here, never heard such a thing. I say we all move to wherever 0357 lives.


Is it me, or does 0357's name sound like an agent Double 07? :D



Maybe that's why they get all that money.

I just saw this and want to add some comments.

In order to "be" a chapter of the NMSS, each chapter is required to offer a financial assistance program.

People with a confirmed dx and who are registered with the NMSS and the local chapter who have a need that cannot be met through their own resources will be served through the local chapter with financial aide.

The determination of need is NOT income based.

We do not pay for medical bills, rx, credit card payments, some utilities, school tuition, etc.

There are 11 categories of goods and services that we do pay for up to a maximum of $500 per year per client. And in some cases, depending on the Chapter Financial Assistance Review Committee's recommendation, this amount could be larger depending on what the request is for. Each determination is on a case-by-case basis.

Last year, 99% of all requests were approved.

Applications cannot be obtained via the internet, they must be handed out to the individual in person. This is the only way each chapter can keep track of who is applying and the reason for each request.

We just had our annual training for financial assistance for Fiscal Year '09 this week. Our budget has been increased, for all of the chapters.

Transportation to and from doc appts is one of the most requested allotments. Our chapter is trying to come up with a long term solution to this problem as there is no transportation system here. It's a real problem.

You can even request funds for chore service after a hospital stay or exacerbation from a licensed agency (house cleaning is a good example.)

If you have a financial need, contact your local chapter of the NMSS. The funds are there. Please use them.