Weekend Check In Time Friday August 22
 

Hello, Friends,

How are you?
What is going on?


I'm tired and my body feels like it has been through the wringer.
Lots of time this week sitting in bad chairs.
Lots of days getting up too early.
I slept last night, but totally worn out from the week.

Another meeting later today.

Mari

Im hanging out with dana today for a while, and going to a friends for cake for her birthday. i have to drop by work and hope i got a check, and drop off some stupid paper our boss had us fill out. i have to check the schedule too.

tomorrow i have work, 2:30-close and i was planning on tie dying on sunday with people but i dont know right yet if i have work or not, that would be stupid. im so so so so close to giving my two weeks notice. i could go back to my old job for the halloween season (i worked at iparty) but then thats only through october. ehhhh i dunnooo

tonite i am seeing south pacific and going out to eat with a close friend. I slept maybe an 1 and half last night and the night before. I feel so empty.
I am so angry at myself. I hate being bipolar right now. My cleaning woman is here and is working so hard and I am feeling so guilty. I should be so thankful. I also start therapy with a new therapist next week.
Bobby
I just feel so unappreciative...
yesterday at the clinic i ran into a guy i liked. the clinic speciaizes in ex drug addicts. It was really sad but he was stoned. I cared about him. Then on the bus i had a great conversation with the most lovely lady. then right before she was getting off she told me she had lymphoma but was in remission. Yesterday I cared so much for those people...

Hi Mari, Meg, and Bobby.

Mari, I am tired also. Hopefully you and I will be able to sleep good tonight.

Meg, I hope you have a good day at work tomorrow.

Bobby, I hope you feel better.

Sunday I'll be having dinner out with a friend. Tonight and until I have dinner out with my friend my boyfriend and I will hang out. My car got rejected today when I took it to get it inspected so I can not drive it at all until I get it straight.

befuddled2

major melt down at work
 

I had a major melt down at work.

I left my purse in a colleague's office.
It was late so everyone was gone.
I had my car keys and my own office keys.

All the back up systems in place failed.
I couldn't even call out of the building except to hubby's cell phone because after about two blocks, it is long distance.

I screamed and cried to hubby.
I was polite to the idiotic security guards.

I drove home, determined not to get overwhelmed again.
I am going to withdrawal from all committees and any work that is beyond about 6 inches from my noise.


At my apt. complex I had to sweet talk the security guard to get in without my card for the gate or my id card, . . . I canceled acupuncturist for tomorrow because I think that I will be working on getting my purse and cell phone back. And I don't want to drive around without drivers license and so on.
I'm sad about that because I really needed to see her.

I think I will take meds early and try to relax.
Hubby is out with his very stupid buddies.


Mari

:hug: Mari :hug:

Sleep tight and don't let the bed bugs bite. Just an old timers expression. This time tomorrow you'll have it all straight.

befuddled2

Oh Mari how awful! I hope you're able to get your stuff back soon, I can imagine it was just terrible on you. Try not to be too hard on yourself we all make mistakes. What I don't understand is how the collegue didn't return it to you you know? I mean I always notice things like that and if someone is about to leave and forgetting something I remind them gently. I guess not everyone is like that. :(

That's fantastic Bobby about how you cared for people yesterday, that's awesome! Glad for you that you had a good chat with a stranger, it's amazingh ow nice those kind of exchanges can be and how good you can walk away feeling. :) I know how you feel about hating being bipolar, it's so darn hard at times to cope with the emotional aspects of bipolar. *Sigh* I just started with a new therapist a couple weeks ago and it's been a good thing for me, I wish you luck with your new Therapist. Keep us posted! :D

Good luck with the tie dying Meghan! I bet your stuff comes out great! I hope you don't have to work today. Hope you have a great day today too! :D

That sucks about your car befuddled2. I am sure you'll get it straightened out soon though. So glad you have a boyfriend now, that's awesome you're being more social with people! Keep us posted on how things go for you this weekend. :D

Have a great weekend everyone! I am stuck at home with the family because of the tropical storm and boy has it been raining! It finally stopped but geez it's been non-stop since Friday at 3pm. I feel pretty low right now because Jackie has been hard to deal with and I just feel weak. Though the mirror therapy I have done has had a miraculous effect you guys, it's UNREAL how much it's made the phantom pain lessen! I used to have on a scale of one to ten, ten being "Take me to the hospital" (that's what my Physical Therapist said so if I haven't gone tot he hospital before for it, and I haven't, the pain goes away too fast for that, then I can't claim to have 10's on the scale...) I would have 9's that felt like electrical energy coursing painfully through the phantom and my stump.

Just after TWO sessions I am DOWN to 3-5 from 9's!!!!!! It's amazing. they are just like stepping on stones now, rather then the knives and hot pokers I have always felt in the past. It's fascinating and I think I am going to write an article or a book, depending on how much material I can generate from this experience so that's awesome! :D

Pam,
I'm thrilled about your mirror treatments. You have new life ahead of you!


Women watch out for each other I think. I always look around the room and make sure the other person has what they started in with. Men don't do that. Also, they don't carry as much stuff as we do.
When the colleague got up to leave, I said I was ready to go too. All he would have had to keep track of was his phone, his keys, and his wallet.

Then we walked out of the door of the office and he locked the door and went to his car. I went to my office and figured out I didn't have my purse as he was driving off.

No one was around except security.


I was hysterical and took until this afternoon to calm down.
Earlier today hubby drove me to another collegue's house to get the key and we went to work and opened the door and so on.


What a week. A purse normally might not get me that worked up, but it did.


I rescheduled the acupuncturist and she calmed me down.
Now I think that I am ready for bed.

Mari

Hi all,

Not much happening this weekend for me...

trying to keep my head on straight....

I haven't slept one wink since Thursday night.

No plans for tomorrow...

Hugs for all...:hug:
Abbie

Hey. What is going on with the server today?
 

Dar Abbie,

I hope that you get some sleep.
No plans is ok. Maybe plan on sleep and doing at least one thing that you like.
Enjoy the rest of the weekend.

mari

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WSH6oBRw6rw
south pacific was fantastific. the url above is a song by male lead. He was best male singer I have ever heard.
I stayed up throughout the three hour performance and then stayed up most of the night and watched cnn
today I was depressed and angry at myself

South Pacific
 

What a voice!
I can see why you stayed for the whole thing.
Do people in NY still get dressed up for those things? Especially on a weekend?
Stay away from CNN.
I listed to part of Biden's speach in the car and found it moving. I even cried -- because today I was in a fragile state anyway.
I liked when he mentioned his wife:

But that was all the politics I got for today and I am happy about that.
Oh yeah, I did order a free Baraka / Biden bumper sticker.

Mari

We just got back from our trip to pensecola.
left early on friday (10am) lol
got there around 4:30 and hit the beach.
Walked up and down the gulf enjoying the warm breeze,
saw crabs, fish, dolphins, birds...what fun!
then had the best steaks in town at a restuarant called Mcquires...fantastic!
then back to the beach for nite time stuff.
walked down to the water and discovered something really wonderful.
Have you ever heard of bioluminesence?
Our cousin brian told us this.
There are particles that light up when you run your fingers across the sand after the water has gone out and it lights up...like sparkles...of greenish light....it is wild!
so we kept running our fingers across the sand to watch the little sparkles light up the sand....crazy! YOu could even see the sparkles under the water up close...again you onlly see this at night when there is not a moon out. It is wild!!!!
So we get to bed late and sleep in to wake up to the tropical storm fay...knocking at our door...so we went to the front desk and asked her if we should leave and she said yes that she would not charge us for the 2nd night.
So we packed the car up and left.
WE had such a good time yesterday and am sorry that our trip was cut short.
This is our 12th wedding anniversary.:Bride:

Oh Mari,
jsut read about your purse...
that is sooo upsetting.
Talk about the worst adult anxiety...even worse is when you don't know where it is or if it has been stolen.....that happened to us over seas a couple of years ago. My carry on bag was there and next thing it wasn't....that was truely awful.

bobby, I am happy for you taht you enjoyed your show. So happy for you!
wish you could sleep better....
(((((HUGS))))
bizi

abbie, sweetie, how much seroquel are you taking at night? Remember doc said you can increase it until it works for you....what does your pdoc say about your not sleeping?
((((HUGS))))
bizi

south pacific etc
 

thank you Bizi....i really was happy to be alive during the show!
new yorkers don't seem to dress up much any more. I can't seem to stay away from Cnn which is making me more hypomanic. I am so afraid Obama is not going to win and we will have more of the same. Great about the bumper sticker. Sorry about your purse. That would have driven me crazy. Are you beginning to feel pressure about your parents' visit? Maybe I shouldn't have mentioned it. HOw long will they stay this time? Do you agree on politics at least?
Bobby