Blew it !!!
 

I haven't had a drink in 2 or 3 days. Now today...i am supposed to be at an alcohol counseling appointment...and what have i done? well, don't suppose it matters why but i had a few drinks before breakfast time even came so...i blew off the appointment. they do talk to folks even under the influence but i just feel such a loser atm. :(

:hug: Just brush yourself off and start again today :) You are far from a 'loser'...besides, I'm not a fan of labels....you are nothing more than a Fallible Human Being...FHB!!!!

It takes time....were you feeling overly anxious about seeing the counselor? Sometimes we reach for the bottle to overcome our anxieties...natural response. You'll get through this! :hug:

And with that post went post #420 :)

Yes I was...it was to be my first appointment. I'm not good meeting new people like doctors, counsellors etc. Plus it's 2 bus rides away and I'm agoraphobic. :(

Thank You for your kind words and reminding me I'm only human, I tend to be too hard on myself.



~and with this goes post 101...way behind Gladys hmmmm...lol~

:hug::hug::hug::) My LOve ,,, You have made a big step !!!

From what I know of not that far back >>...... :hug: You have come so so ,,, soooooooooooooooooooooo FAR !!:highfive:

WMD. {~Corky~} xoxox.

((((((corky)))))) :hug::hug::hug: you know me better than anybody here...and...ty for reminding me how far i have come.:)

roz :heartthrob::heartthrob::heartthrob:

agoraphobia is a pain? huh? ;) I have a friend who was...she now has her licence for the first time(in her 30's) and is out and about in the world.

Lots of these counselors out there, well, some have been there, done that. I wouldn't fear too much about what they may or may not think of you :) It's a 'calling' of sorts to do the jobs that they do :)

Hope today is a better day for you! :hug:

Thank You, today is better for me. :)

I spoke to my caseworker today and she knows I'm doing way better with this agoraphobia and can go days without a drink now too.

But she made the assumption that this appointment was in the city, which she knows I can manage. So, she's going to arrange another appointment and drive me there.

Glad to hear your friend is managing to get out and about now. Even in a car, please tell I think she rocks. :)

:hug:

I usually do this for newcomers. But for you, I make it special.

You are not alone.:)
You are one of us.:hug:
And we are here to help.:grouphug:

You decided to fight this poison that clouds our thoughts and corrupts our actions. You also were smart enough to realize you need help with this fight.

That's two steps closer than you were. :)

You didn't blow it. Just a standing 8 count.
Now go to your corner, catch your breath, and come out fighting again.:D

My lil heart bear, its not the 'falling off the wagon' that is shameful...its the not getting back on. A man I admired very much believed that statement...he fell many times before he finally controlled his demon. He was sober for over 15 years when he died from cancer. The 'falling off the wagon' he once told me...is not just about alcohol...its about life in general.

From the moment we are born we have to learn things in order...we crawl then walk. In learning those things we often stumble or fall down...eventually if we are determined...we walk and we do it with confidence! You will get where you want to be...just keep trying and if you fall down...

that's why we will be here...to help you up.:hug:

Thank You so much...it helps knowing others care and understand and that i'm not alone. :hug:

awww Thank You so much :hug: it's great to know that folks here don't judge but rather support. and yes, i stayed straight for 10 years so i know i can do it again.

love and hugs,
roz
:hug:

Hi K.J!!! I just popped in for a minute and saw this thread! This is an amazing thread....what support!!!! I felt very emotional as I read thru it and almost started crying....I can really tell how much all these members care!! This is wonderful!
I have been where you were many times....every time something came up that I needed to attend I just could not do it and drank instead. I missed alot of school events for my kids because I just felt so out of place.....I did not go to a doctor unless I was really really ill...I did not have a pap or physical for 17 years!!!!!
I still can be a little shyish but not like before....I like to be there for others now!! I like to be there for me too!!
Do not fret over it....you are reaching our for help and that is great. You will do it!! You have did it before and you will do it again! We are all here for you:grouphug:Big Hugs!!!

((((((((Dorrie)))))))) :hug:


Thank You :) But enough about me...how are you? How's your week been? :hug:

Hi Kalamity Jane!!!

My week was good...busy as usual but good. This week is exciting because my hubby has been sober 8 years on the 19th of September!!!!! We don't get to as many meetings since Saffire came to live with us but we are both doing good. I love coming here for support...even though it is not face to face it is great support and we all know how it is for each other!
How are you doing now KJ? I hope you are feeling better about things. I always try to stay in the day...that helps...it is not always easy but if you practice it enough it does become easier! Please know that you are in my thoughts and prayers:hug::hug::hug::hug:Luv Dorrie:)

Hi Dorrie :hug:

Glad to hear you've had a good week. It's great your hubby is 8 years sober. That takes a lot of hard work...please pass on my congrats? :)

I have to admit i find the support here invaluable. My first alcohol support meeting was a joke. I made the stupid assumption it would be in the city and found out too late it was miles away...2 or 3 bus rides...and i couldn't do it being agoraphobic...grrrrr!

Still, i got off drink last time with no proffessional help and stayed dry for 10 years...so i know i can do it again.

It's just that for me...staying in the day is hard coz the days are not good atm :( but i know i'll get there.

Much thanx for your love, support and prayers Dorrie, it means much :)

You are in my thoughts also. :hug:

Hello roz~~ I saw the title of your thread and just started reading. First of all, you change that mood thingy right now Missy! You are alive, you are important and you are cared about.

I don't have any experience in what you are going through, but I just wanted to pop in and say to keep going, keep your chin up and KEEP coming here to talk to us.

Hang in there and know that I care...

*did you change your "mood" banner yet? I'm watching!!!:);)

LOL ((((DM)))) i didn't think anybody noticed my mood indicator :icon_redface:

And yes i will keep coming here to talk as it does help knowing how much folks here do all care for each other.:)

Thank You for caring enough to reply, it means much :)

*btw mood indicator changed* :hug:

Good, that's a start. Now, just remember that you should always come here when you need a little comfort or just need to vent. That's what we are all here for~~ each other.

Never think of yourself as a loser again, ok???

(((((((KJ))))))

((((((((DM)))))))) i'll remember that thank you :)

You are not a loser. I remember when I first HAD TO QUIT DRINKING because of being in too much trouble with the courts. It is the hardest thing I have ever had to do in my life. Now I have lost my boyfriend to suicide and want to drink really bad but haven't yet anyway. I was forced to take something called antibuse. I was on it for 3 years and it worked. Now all I have to do is stay sober. Keep your head up and take care of you. Everything will be ok. When it's the right time for you you will know it.

I am worried...I am not the person I used to be.
 

I have been in treatment for depression for 39 years....but now the worst thing has happened. I am craving inhalants...everything. Started about 3 months ago..thought it was harmless....sniffed furniture refinisher about 8 times a day but not for long...then paint...gasoline....kerosene...even bug spray...hair spray..nail polish...nail polish remover...car starter (ether), room deodorizer (Glade), Lysol, any aerosol, cooking spray, hair mousse, deodorant, diesel fuel, shoe polish, typewriter correction fluid, any solvent...., etc. I stopped for a week or so, and relapsed. I had been off it for one month this last time, but blew it this weekend, when I accidentally put my hand on a can of paint my husband had hidden. I literally covered my whole face, and nose with paint...even eyelashes. It was horrible, and I did it twice. The craving is unbearable. When I saw myself in the mirror, I nearly died. I AM NOT GOING TO GO THIS ROUTE! PLEASE HELP ME!! I FEEL CALM NOW and am not craving....God help me.....

Take it one day at time - once that bottle starts to linger on your mind have a fall back plan - maybe take a walk, call a friend, go on a double cheeseburger run:) anything that will take your mind on a different journey! Good Attitude and good support is key!!

Hi jane, hope you are doing well. Always before thinking about drinking(or taking any drug of choice), use the "HALTS" method. Ask yourself if you are :Hungry,Angry, Lonely,Tired,or Scared. If "yes" to any, then deal w/that specific issue. Journaling helps a lot too. Just writing things down on paper allows us to organize our thoughts and feelings. Also, don't beat yourself up so much. Ask yourself how you would respond to a dear friend in the same situation, and treat yourself just as good as you would treat someone you love! Good luck to you. Blessings!