Joy is the goal of life....
 

As you guys know I have been trying to deal with my fears of failure.
I have been unable to take CPR due to this fear.
I think I would like to open up a clinic but am afraid to even think about what would be required to do this...I am afraid to get out of this box that I am stuck in........ so I have been reading this wonderful book:
Feel the fear and do it anyway.
by Susan Jeffers, Ph.D.
Great book, first book that I have read in a very long time.
I highly recommend it!

Thank you for posting this Bizi.

barbara

Beth,
This looks like a good book.
I'm glad that you are finding it useful.
M.

Great post!! Thanks for sharing.................


Nikko:hug:

yes
 

i agree. thank you for posting the passage, and especially this bit.

i am wishing i'd asked for that book for Christmas. that's ok. i can order it through amazon with my next allowance i think i want to read it too.

i have huge fear of failure, and am facing a change of career - never mind the getting a job part in between - i am so terrified of making a wrong move, of flopping on my face and breaking my nose... i feel too old to "do it" but too young and restless not to... you only live once... i regret not having done this 10 years ago... in 10 years, i don't want to regret not having done it NOW....

~ waves ~ the sickie :(

Dear Waves,
The book is excellant.
I think it would be just perfect for you.
I bet you could find it in the library it has been around for 20 years.
Or amazon might have it for just a few bucks....
I am sorry that you are plagued with fear as well.
I hear you.
My right hip has started hurting me...been 2 months now...just getting worse...am afraid to got to the doctors office, am just going to wait and see...I keep telling myself that it is arthritis. It could be something really serious....
~sigh
beth

Bizi...
I was thinking that in keeping with the thoughts of this book, why don't you read up on arthritis, do what you can on your own to see if you can get improvement and then set a date to see if that happens. Perhaps give yourself two or three weeks (probably no more). If you don't feel better...then "feel the fear and do it anyway" and simply go to the doctor. I wouldn't think twice about it....
I hope I didn't say anything out of line here. I haven't read this book in a long time. In fact, your posts have inspired me (thank you!) and I have re-ordered it used from Amazon! (I gave my old copy away a long time ago!). I think the bottom line might be that it is healthy and right to be responsible (this is a good thing) and part of responsibility is moving forward. Sometimes we have moments when this is a struggle, but in the end, pushing through these struggles and getting to the other side will make us feel better. During the struggle...just put one foot in front of the other...
Additionally, my guess is that if arthritis is paining you in both a physical way and in a psychological one (what I mean by this is that it is on your mind all the time and causing you to feel down, etc.), then it will be hard for you to full engage in the "process of life." You deserve better.
(Hugs)

p.s. Thank you also for that passage about the spiritual side of ourselves. This reminder was wonderful. Again, I do recall that this was a great book and do appreciate being reminded of this.

Thank you vowel lady,
Fear can be irrational or imagined.
It can be paralyzing.
As far as my hip goes, I thought that maybe my job was the culprit, am on my hands and knees alot but have had 2 weeks off, the pain is still there, same thing with my car, it is a honda and I have heard of a "honda hip" so did not drive for 2 weeks as well. it doesn't hurt all of the time only when I rotate it distally, like I can't put my foot on my knee. Iwonder if I had a physical therapist evaluation....that they could evaluate me, other wise I would have to see an ortho doctor?
~sigh
I don't want to address this issue, because obcessing about my physical health can get me all worked up, (manic).
I have not been stable for quite some time.
I see my tdoc this week....we have alot to talk about.
I am hoping that she can help me too with my fears.
beth

Hi Bizi!! I have that book....Susan Jeffers, Ph.D. wrote it.....it is a wonderful book!! My mom and I both suffer from anxiety and have found ourselves in some situations where others would say..."Just do it"...well..it is not quite that easy, is it.(but they do not understand)
I alsoo read through a book called "The Power of Now"...I took what I needed from that book and it helped me tremendously!! It made me recognise my feelings..ie..fear....feel them and know why I am feeling them..and accept it....very hard for me to explain...but worth checking out....it helped me to stay in the now...most of our fears come from the past or fear of the future...focusing on now and redirecting thaat focus over and over leaves little room to dwell anywhere else!
It seems like you want to explore spitituality Bizi! I think that is wonderful...Hubby and I are in AA and when we got sober, over time we both found ourselves to be very spiritual....I find it such a deeply personal thing....a life changing realization bringing joy and contentness..real happiness....I have to go time for Saffs nap...will pop back in later.
Good Luck on your journey Bizi!!!!:hug:Dorrie

[I am one that can not always figure out why there is pain in a joint. Thanks to the fact that I've had lots of problems with my arms, neck and shoulders.

So when my left shoulder started bothering me again after I had thought I had successfully gotten rid of the problem. I had just let it go. ALong with
the letting my massage therapist work on it. But its been over a month probably honestly closer to two months. And the pain is still very bad at times. So I have a appointment tomorrow with a ORthopedist to have it
seen. I personally believe its arthritis but know that bursitis has struck this shoulder twice and its got a lot of the same feelings. This to me isn't a good thought. ITs something that I'm going to have to talk to this doctor about.

But its also not the same one as the first two times, the one before is way to busy had no appointments.
Donna

Hi Bizi! I was just reading about your hip. I too have had a problem with my hip. My left one. I was to the point that I could not lift my left foot up toward me..to my right knee to tie my shoelace! If I tried to swing in like a pendulum as soon as it went toward the right it hurt do much! If I turned too quickly something tweeked it and ow it was excruciating!! I mean this pain was off the scale when it hit like that. I felt it most of the time and I even felt it in bed...I had to move to get the right spot...a pillow between my legs helped somewhat...I even did Melodys ivory soap bar!! It had continued on for the better part of a year!!!! One day I thought of something. I have an old glider rocker and for the better part of a year I had spent time rocking Saff in it. Twice a day for an average of 1/2 hour each time. I had a good look at the rocker and realized that the pillow was always sort of sagging on that side....the springs were fine though.
Long story short....I put a good sized foam cushion on it ...I pushed it more to the left side so I woud have a little more support on that side. It is not pretty but believe it or not...I have no more hip pain...NONE. I wonder how long you spend driving in your car Bizi...could it be that you need a change in your butt position..maybe a little more cush on one side. I know when I drive I often find myself off center on the seat wiggling around once I am driving trying to get comfy. I am always in hurry to get from point a to b. I really should take a moment to get more comfortable.

I hope you find out the cause and start to feel better Bizi. Just thought I would mention my stuff after reading about the "Honda Hip" just in case I can help in some way. I will say a prayer for you tonight Bizi for relief from your pain as soon as possible!! Hugs:hug:

It's going to be ok. You can choose not to worry about this.
 

Dear Bizi,

A doc can send you to get some pictures and then tell you what might be going on. Most of the time, when we have something wrong with us, it is something fairly ordinary.


If you feel better letting a ph therapist evaluate you instead of a doc, then do that. Either way, it is always a good decision to take care of ourselves.


If it is best for your stability to ignore it a little while longer, than that is completely up to you as well. A vote for stability probably overrides any other vote.


Make a choice for now and then re-evaluate what you want to do in two weeks.


I'm sorry that you are in pain. :Heart:



Mari

Thank you mari and dorrie,
I have been veru uncomfortable in my car for some time now and have a lumber support cushion that needs to be replaced...maybe I don't need it maybe that is causing my right hip to be off wack. thanks for the suggestion.
going to remove the pillow and see how I do.
beth

Good luck with the change, Bizi. :)

I went to a orthopaedic doctor today. Have to admit the appt was for my shoulder. Its been hurting for over a couple of months. But then I fell
on christmas eve and hurt the wrist or hand on the same arm. So I had
both seen and xrayed.

I have nothing broken, or badly hurt so far. Have a different splint on the
wrist now. And am headed to pt for the shoulder.

Donna

Donna,
 

Dear Donna,
That is good news about no broken bones. :)
I hope that the splint and the pt help.

M.