So today Friday is the day.....
 

Yep, Friday morning....8am is my appt with the neuro. This should be interesting....I'm anxious to see if she is just as invalidating as the last neuro I had *sigh*. I'm praying not!!!

I was able to find all my paperwork on my test results from 2002, from bloodwork to MRI's to evoked potentials and EEG and lumbar puncture. During the last stint of testing, I had sat down and written out things that had happened during my teens and adulthood that separately, meant basically nothing, but when looked at together over the years, could very well have been preludes to an MS dx. The last neuro wouldn't even look at what I had written. :mad:

So, yep, I got it all together now, in a nice neat package and will hand it all to the new neuro in the morning. I'm really nervous about this. I keep thinking it's all in my head (yeah I know I know, but you know what I mean LOL). I keep telling myself I'm just lazy and looking for an excuse to not go to work, looking for an excuse to not having a life, looking for an excuse to feel sorry for myself.

I told a good friend the other day how I was thinking in that regard. She pretty much raised her voice and said..."Now wait a minute, you, of all people NEVER complain about illness. You push yourself and push yourself and you never cease to amaze me what you accomplish when I know damned well you are hurting!". Now, while hearing this from my dear friend is very validating and wonderful and I love her so much for saying that, I still can't keep this fear at bay that I'm being stupid and silly and lazy.

I don't want to have MS, but dang it, if I have it, I want to be treated NOW...not another 7 years from now when things may be so bad there is no hope at all. Am I looking at this the wrong way?? Heck, I'm not getting any dang younger here....I'm going to be 53 soon. I have 2 new grandbabies on the way this year....I have to be able to be there for my grandbabies and their parents...damn damn damn.

:(:(:(
seara

Just wanted to wish you luck,Seara. Hang in there.

I know you want an answer, and I hope you get one soon. However, I know people that have gone for years and still do not have answers to what is happening. If you don't get an answer, just remember it is not the end of the line. You still will be the same as you were yesterday and today, getting a dx, even an incorrect one, will not change you.

Good luck tomorrow and I will keep you in my thoughts...and sending you bunches of 'Momma' hugs...:hug::hug::hug:

It's a new year, and hopefully this will bring you new answers and closure seara. :hug:

I wish you the very best of luck with you appointment today Seara and I hope you get some much needed relief and answers! You will be in my thoughts and please keep us updated when you can!

Good luck! I am thankful every day that I was dx'd before ever thinking I could have a problem (is that what MS is, a problem????)

Anyway, my prayers are with you and hope you get some answers this morning.

Good luck at the neuro's today. We will be thinking of you. Let us know how it went. :hug:

I am one that is undx... and have many disabilities, sxs, and problems...
good luck at the apt...your thread reminded me I should find all my stuff..as I meet yet another neuro this month. Hugsss and good luck, sarah

How did it go, Seara? :hug:

Thank you everyone for sticking by me and supporting me.

The visit did not go well. She was just as invalidating as the other neuro....cold....seemed to have her mind made up before I even sat down to speak with her. The neuro exam she gave me was less than I've gotten from an ER doc at any given time. If I wasn't so thrown by the experience, it would have been laughable. She said there was nothing that she could see that pointed to MS or any other autoimmune disease. She said that the symptoms point to issues from my migraines, that I was possibly having small TIA's and then dropped the subject. :eek: :thud:

The only good thing is that I do have an MRI scheduled for Sunday morning and a recheck with her next Friday for the results. She actually had the nerve to ask me if I wanted to schedule the MRI now or later when I was more financially stable. Well now, aren't we all worried about the almighty $$???? It wasn't for my benefit believe me, she already knew that I was applying for financial assistance with the hospital.

I am so upset right now...I broke down and cried in her office. I told her she was invalidating and I didn't appreciate her not taking my or my symptoms seriously. She just kind of looked at me like I had 2 heads.

I guess what I will do is wait for the MRI results next Friday and see where that goes. If she is still unwilling to budge on even a hint of a dx for ANYTHING....I will phone my pcp and let her know and then ask for another referral to another neuro....at this point I don't care where the doctor is located.....just get me one that will treat me like a human being who is suffering.....not just someone who is looking to skip out on life.

I have worked hard all my life....I hate and I mean hate being this way. She treated me like I was trying to find an excuse not to work. She asked me why after all these years of continuing to have flares did I just now come back to the doctors. Good crimminies....I sucked it up for crying out loud. I had no money. I had no insurance. I sucked it up and worked through everything the best I could. Now, I can't suck it up any longer....I'm exhausted, I'm in pain, I'm scared to death and I need help. I don't need her condescending attitude.

Bah.....screw it.....I'll just suck it up some more....story of my life....just suck it up seara.....there now, that's a good girl.............................................. ..................................

:icon_mad::paperbag::hissyfit:

sorry everyone.... :Sorry::confused2::Sob:

:hug::hug::hug:

That sucks, seara. I'm sorry that you got treated that way. It's NOT helpful at all when docs dismiss you.

Hopefully something will show up on the MRI that will help explain the sx you're having.

And believe me, I understand your frustration. Not everyone runs to the doctor about everything or says everything that's bothering them when they ARE at the doc.

:hug:

And I don't blame you at all for looking for a doc who treats you as a person. That's NOT too much to ask from a professional. So hang in there and go somewhere else if you have to.

ahhh hun HUGSSSSSSSSS
sorry it went that way. last neuro I seen said it is anxiety, and when I asked why I dont have sxs when pregnant..she said..."cause your happy when you are pregnant dear" I could have cried. Cause we had just talked over a bit of my history, and I have lost one baby full term. So when preggo the last three times, are you telling me that there is no underlying anxiety of losing another child???!!! I walked out so mad.

Anyhow, sorry for my rant...this is your thread...Just know I understand, the feeling. I think drs dont realize How bad my sxs are either, cause as my sister once told me, if she was having some of the stuff I deal with she would be in the ER every few days....

I know our ER little town as it is, is not going to figure anything out..so I tend to live with the problems. Maybe that is my problem.

anyhow..sorry just want you to know I totally understand your feelings..I have had somethign going on for 9 years. yes 9.... good luck and more hugsss,sarah

My first neuro who dxed me snapped back at me as I moaned "MS? Noooo, I don't want (MS) "Well you knew SOMETHING was wrong with you."
My PCP on the phone when she called after finding out and I cried at her kindness said "You have a right to cry"
I never went back to that Neuro again. Found MS specialist neoro who I like.
Good luck, there are good doctors out there.

Seara...I would gladly smack the crapon peas out of her for you!! I might understand the no diagnosis but being rude and insensitive...oh no, not to one of my babies!! :mad: You forget about her and try to find a neurologist that is a MS specialist, not one that just treats MS. Take the MRI and results to another if she can't give you an answer.

I had a neuro tell me it wasn't MS after being treated for over three years...you don't need the meds he said...stop taking them...I did and went on a hospital vacation for 12 days!!

You don't have to 'suck it up', you need answers as to why you feel as you do. Migraines are usually caused by something...I've had them for over 30 years...so don't just discard those headaches. It seems that you could get the sx treated for some relief even if not a diagnosis.

I am sooo sorry your appointment did not go well and hopefully you can get answers...what state are you located. Someone here might know a very human neurologist! I found as a rule most neuros are not 'people' oriented, I've been very lucky to have two that are and several other docs also.

Sending you more...:hug::hug:

Smack, smack...lets all smack this neuro...she wasn't in Savannah was she...sounds like one I did a follow up with. lol

Gosh Seara, I'm sorry the neuro was such a witch. I know what you mean, I've been to some real loo-loo's myself. I had one actually yell at me that it was impossible to have so many symptoms. I felt like giving him a swift kick in the leg.

You just gotta keep trying to find a doctor who is also a human being. They are out there, they're just hard to find. :)

Good luck with your MRI, and with your next neuro visit. :hug:

I'm so sorry the neuro was so rude during your appt. :( I hope you'll find a good one that will take the time to find the cause of your symptoms. :hug: It almost sounds like that one was money motivated. :(

ouch, i'm so sorry this appt went so badly.
i'm proud of you for speaking up even if you cried in her office.
drs that don't respond to suffering and human emotions don't deserve our business.

you have a good and solid plan.
stay strong. you can do this.

Bless Your Heart...
 

You are in my thoughts... wish there was more I could do... I hope you get some answers soon. Meanwhile, I pray:smileypray: for you to have strength and peace. I know how hard it is to be in constant pain. I hope you can get some relief of some kind.:hug:

((((((((Seara)))))))))

It never ceases to amaze me how some of these jerks make it through medical school, and actually have a practice!

Big hugs, and hang in there!

Aaargh!!! I'm sorry you got stuck with another loser. Your luck is bound to change soon so don't give up!
Till then..http://www.mskurmudgeonskorner.com/f...ilies/gaah.gif

Wait, this doesn't count as a 2009 disaster doctor, because the appointment was scheduled during 2008, right? ;)

I'd not count it towards this new year seara. You'll find the doctor you need, hang in there! :hug:

What part of primum non nocere (First, do no harm) do these doctors not understand?

Just because they're not physically harming you when being condescending little putzes doesnt mean they're not harming you when they treat their patients like that.

I'm guessing they skipped over that chapter in the bedside manner courses.

You folks are so awesome!

So this morning I'm off for my MRI. Whooopie!

Friday morning I go for the results...it's going to be a long week. Good thing I have my daughters' baby shower to plan and get ready for. She's due in February with her first child...a boy :) She's my baby....boy do I feel old *sigh* LOL

This is way too early on a Sunday morning to be up and going for an MRI............................................... off to get dressed and out the door.

Hope everyone has a wonderful Sunday!

:hug:
seara

Congratulations:hug::hug:seara:hug::hug:, soon-to-be Grandma. Baby showers are so much fun! :Head-Spin:

Sorry to hear this doc was also a putz, keep on truckin is all you can do, i would write a letter to this doc pretty much saying what you said and maybe the medical association, it kind of sounded as if she did have her mind made up, i thought objective and open mindedness was a valued trait in Docs, maybe i am wrong

Sounds like this doc has never been sick or scared or frustrated. Heck, he sounds like a first class dork. Sorry, hope you find a good one.

Congrats on the upcoming blessed event! Have fun with the baby shower. I hope your MRI went well. Just thinking of you! :hug:

Ok....had the MRI on Sunday....it went well. I love feeling all cacooned (sp) into that loud machine (I'm a pretty big girl). It really was quite cozy and I actually caught myself starting to snore on 2 occasions.....go figure LOL.

Today I called the hospital and asked for the written report of the MRI. I'm hoping that some of you wonderful folks who are so much more educated than I am can help me understand it enough so I don't sound like a total idiot when I see the bad bad neuro lady doc on Friday. grrrrrrrr :mad:

I hope ya'll don't mind me asking....

Quick background -

7 years ago, I had 5 lesions, 1 was in the corpus collasum (not there now) 3 were in frontal lobes 2 I don't remember where LOL.

I do have Type 2 diabetes and am being treated for it.

Mom died 27 years ago from glioblastoma behind her right eye. (this has always made me nervous)

I do not have high blood pressure but I do suffer from migraines...some with and some without aura.

I will request Lyme disease testing.....but in my gut and my heart of hearts, I know I don't have it.

Question: Are these "active" lesions or old ones? And, what do you all think should be my next step here?

Thanks so much for all your help :heartthrob:
seara

Sierra

I can't help with reading MRI but want to wish you luck Fri and please let us know how your appointment goes.
Good luck
laurie f

Sorry I can't help you with reading the MRI. I do think you have to have the medicine given partway through the MRI to see any active lesions. I can't remember the name glad, something or other.

Well, I guess I won't be bothering you wonderful folks with anything more. The results I received today from the bad neuro doc.....what a meanie, show that it is not MS. Lesions are not in the right place of the brain to be considered MS.

So, I'm released from her care...thank goodness as she was the most invalidating, insulting doctor I've ever had the displeasure of meeting.

She refused to listen to me about anything...insinuated that my weight played a role and that I needed to get off my lazy **** and excercise. Little did she know (because she wouldn't have listened anyways) that no matter what my weight has every been....I've ALWAYS been active.

Screw you doc.....I'm considering writing a letter to the president of the hospital complaining about your bedside manner and "close to illegal" comments you made to me today. You had your mind made up last week at our first visit....and I was doomed from that point on. Screw YOU!

:mad::mad::mad:
seara

PS. Sorry for the rant.....like I said, I shan't bother ya'll wonderful folks anymore with my whinging. Thank you from the bottom of my heart (contrary to the doctors belief, I do have one) for all the kindness, caring and support you have shown me. Ya'll rock and my wishes for each one of you is that you live well, feel well, and know that you all matter!
:grouphug: seara

All I can say is SORRY!

I would still be following up with the Lyme disease possibility too.

You have migraines, diabetes, are in the "older" category, etc. . . . and all those factors 'seem' to fit with the lesions they've identified. I don't recall what your symptoms are, but it is sometimes hard for them to distinguish MS symptoms when there are other KNOWN conditions/illnesses clouding the picture.

If your symptoms are debilitating, and the cost does not prohibit another opinion at this point, I think it would be worthwhile to get one. Even if they can't identify MS as the "cause" for your difficulties, you are still suffering, and may not be able to work anyway.

Did you see one neuro years ago, or how many have you seen all up?

Cherie

HUGS to you and Yours ~!
 

Oh my dear Seara...do you bring back memories of me..then and now. Just wanted to tell you that I understand..more than you know.

Here is my take on this. I had to STOP thinking it was MS..even tho MRIs were suggestive.. my PCP did refer me to an MS specialist. For a short while my MS neuro thought it could be a mild case and was willing to monitor me..but not treat it. OK with me...I dont want those meds..another story.Then finally he said no its not MS.

He DID validate that "something" was definitely wrong.. neuro like..but it has no name. OK..i give up on MDs..but he did send me to another neuro in his office to find out. Now this MD got really excited thinking I had narcolepsy with cateplexy.

Again.. job changes..new insurance..no more seeking DXs or neuros...and this new PCP..said when she heard my history.. and they dont think you have MS?? And they dont think you dont have seizures??

BUT

Miracle of all miracles..she sends me to her mothers neuro out of network for me..who specializes in neuro muscular and autonomic problems..like her mother has. I am going to give him a try.

So.. as hard as this sounds.. not everything NEURO IS MS!!

Because of your migraines..which are very serious and show all kinds of changes in the brain.. mix in our American Diet of chemicals..breathing chemcials..we're seeing ALL kinds of people with neurological symptoms. There IS something wrong!! but it may not have a name like MS>!!

Many MDs do not have the guts or training to say I DO NOT KNOW WHAT IS WRONG with YOU. You do not fit into any boxes I studied!! Believe..some are good and try...but when you dont fit nicely in their diagnostic boxes...they make up stuff.. that sounds like they know.. rather than say I DO NOT KNOW> This NEURO you say IS probably still thinkking of what you told her about being invalidating.. but.. depending on her ego..not sure what she'll do about changing her attiutude.They are so lost..when they can't name it ..test it.. or write a RX for it~!!!

OK.. I said this is MY POINT of view.

Stay here please..like I do from time to time.. to ask questions.. share frustrations and GIVE back to others in the struggle.. you'll never be alone..trust me ok?

Warmly Jan

P.S. I found a guru of a nutritionist that has detoxed me from heavy metals..built up my depleted toxic deficient systems and helped A LOT!! So much so with balance and cognitive problems that my neuros send me to him when I have a flare!!! Yup..go figure.

Seara, There's no need for you to leave! Stay here with us. I'm sorry you had such a terrible experience with that neuro. We will never invalidate you here. :hug::hug: We do understand. I'm not sure if this was already a 2nd opinion,but either way, I'd seek another opinion.

hi seara,

i'm sorry about the md visit. i would follow thru with the letter. don't let her get away with this behavior without a fight. something written is appropriate. but stick to the facts. be impartial.

from what i read on the mri, and i'm no expert, is that none of the lesions are enhancing, or active. i can't say what could be causing them.

i had a friend with bad migraines and her neuro started giving her botox shots. it's helped a lot. even had it approved by insurance.

and btw, don't leave. stay with us while you struggle thru this. now you're part of our family.

Hi seara,
First of all, never let anyone get to you like that. To make you feel that way.
:( Like that Neuro is perfect in every way, yeah right!

Think about this. We all had to be in Limbo-Land before we found out what was our true ailment. Even then, some have had it changed again, back and forth.

Doctors do not all have good bedside manner. I met a few green frogs along the way too. I think I could've taught them. :) Remember not all finish in the top of their class. :D They all have different personalities, knowledge and some don't follow up on the latest classes and seminars to keep updated.

This doctor really might not know what is wrong with you, maybe the last one or the next one won't either. But take a deep breath and just get symptom treatment for what is bothering you now.

Don't mention MS. Doctors hate to be told what YOU think you have. They want to call it, whatever it is.

Have patience. It takes time , we all went through this for years. Some get Classic MS MRI's with classic symptoms, with Classic testing and they get Dx'd right away. Mine presented itself in a hard to figure out case. 4 years with visible symptoms.

Also don't feel you have to have a dx to be on any website. Just be here and talk, support us and we support you in all matters. It just takes time. Calm down cool off and come back.:)
Lady

:)