Two years my daughter is gone
 

I can't begin to understand how much pain you're going through DiMarie.

I lost 4 of my babies but they all died before they were born. I never got the chance to hold any of them, or get to know them like you did your own daughter.

I grieved for their loss.... each and every one of them, and there have been times when it hurt so much, I didn't think I'd survive. The pain was so bad!

DiMarie, your pain must be at least ten fold what I went through....... having a child to nurture, to hold, to love.

Please know that I'm thinking of you.... that I care. :hug:

HUGSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS I lost a daughter,but full term still birth..and cant imagine after they have grown. HUGSSSSSSSSSSSS and thinking of you, hugss,sarah

Those anniversary dates are so hard to get through Di, of course we miss them everyday...but it's somehow worse on "that" day. :hug:

DiMarie, my brother died when he was 19. It has been 30 years and I still hurt, I still cry, and I still wish I could hug him one last time.

But I can't even begin to imagine the pain you and my mom & dad have had to endure.

No one should have to bury their child.

God bless you.

One Day
 

you will hold each other again, and it will be for eternity.

Until then I wish you peace and strength to deal with your emptiness.

:Sorry:

Im so sorry...........its so hard to learn to live with a broken heart.:( It
sounds like you have some wonderful memories of your beautiful daughter.
:hug::hug::hug:..no parent should ever have to lose a child..:hug::hug:

I'm so sorry for your loss and I can understand how it must still be very painful for you. :hug:

I lost a brother and sister. My brother was 19 years old and had a military funeral. I was 12 years old and sat next to my Mom when they played taps. The tears were shooting from her eyes like a sprayer. I felt so helpless and overwhelmed by her grief. She suffered for years after... Then my sister died 12 years later at age 37. Both of my parents suffered so much for their losses. I can only hope I'll go before our sons.

(((DiMarie))) you are in my prayers. :hug:

:hug:DiMarie:hug:

Thinking of you there, Di. :hug:

Di, thinking of you at this very difficult time :hug::hug:

We lift you and your family up, she is beautiful. People think I am a little nuts but I still talk to my loved ones. A parent should never out live there children. If you just need to visit we are here.

Di :hug: I am sorry, as a male I can not know the true essence of the passing of a child, but as father who was the sole parent I can understand the hurt and depth of the pain, My prayers and my wifes are with you always:hug:

I'm so sorry for your loss. My heart goes out to you :hug: I can only imagine the pain in your heart. Try to take it a day at a time, cry when you have to, let it all out :grouphug:

Bless you all for caring :grouphug:
I do all I can to go on, but some of the best treatment comes for caring friends, that just hug and allow me to share.

Ewizabeth,
you said it so well when you shared how your Mom's loss had her crying like sprayers. I remember using hand towels as tissues would never touch the flow. The heavy flow of tears, has been more controled, but the heart ache of acceptance of the days as they go by is increased.

I hope that I can find answers, I do not want a family to loose a love one as I did. Maybe that is part of the healing, and stages of grief, blame. and I pray for justification.

So I pray, cry, and go forward each day, not each hour as it had been.
Blessings to all of you and my prayers for the losses.
di

Di, I just have to tell you this... Not sure if I'll make much sense but I'll try. I was away from computer access for a very long time, but when I came back I checked for your name, [even though we rarely used the same forums]. I'd seen you posting for years here and there but I was so upset and sad for you when your daughter passed away and I cried and cried for your loss.

I remember posting to you on a thread way back then, but only once I think, because it was in your home forum. The thing that I'm trying to convey here, is that even though I only posted once, you were always in my thoughts. I think many people felt the same so even if they never said or say it publicly or even if they are people you haven't known very well on the internet, please know that there are many of us like me who have been there alongside you all the way. I have teary eyes just writing to you about this now.

One day at a time... :hug:

Lara,
I know exactly what you are saying and it moves me to tears as that is how I am surviving. If I had to go through this alone, I would be just a shell. But, friends and the circle they create around me keep me going.

You words are so deep to my soul and touching into my heart. Lara,you have a sensitive kindness that is a blessing to more people then just me I bet.

I wish I could hug you all, It is with out any doubt I knew the love of friends long time and new, that have touched me in so many special ways.
Sometimes I think it is my De that sends you all to say just what I need to hear.
I am sitting here with tears just running down my face by the thoughts you are sharing.
Many years on the forum and many unseen faces, but the new friends and old are my paved way to go through each day.

Thank you, Thank you, so very much...
All of you are so special to me and caring I do not know how I would go through this without the forum friends I have made.

I just hpe that I do not have to support my dear friends because of a loss like this.
I love you all so much :hug:
I know my De is so glad I have you all.
di

:hug:

We are all like a big spread out family.

I know these 2 years have been painful for you and your family Di. Your posts have been encouragement to others. You have been so brave. :hug: I'm proud to be your friend.

One of our RSD members just had her 20 yr old daughter pass away. :( I'm sure reading your posts will help her through the darkness.

You are are a special person for us all Curious!

It is a club I never want anyone to be a member of. I feel I should be visiting my grandchildren, not visiting her grave. Especially losing anyone during this time of the year. Nothing cures, but some things help.

I am not sure if I said it on this thread, but:
When you lose parents you are an Orphan, when you lose a Spouse you are a widow, but when you lose a child there are no words for it.

She can feel free to contact me...

DiMarie

Sending thoughts and prayers to you. I remember the day it first
posted. And wishing I could put my arms around you.

You made the comment, that you hope your situation with her
death has made a impact in someone's life.

I know for a fact it has. I watch out for my sister's who have some
of the same problems a lot closer. I've told them both to make sure
they let me or someone in the family know if things aren't right.

And I also keep a close eye on my parents and their kids that I advocate
for. So much so that I can say I know of at least one time your
story has probably saved a young one in my area.

So thank you from those that I serve, your story being so openly told.
Has saved many, and will

Donna

My dear friend Donna,
I am so moved, if you can picture me crying and thankful all at once.
Thank you for sharing your message with me. I needed it so much. It made my heart swell to know the implications your caring extended from my tears. It carries me day to day.

When I read about Debby's recentloss of her dd, and the dates to my own dd, I just wanted to wrap her in my arms and take away some of the heart ache.
No parent should lose a child. But, if a miricle of a message can come out of it, the healing goes on....
AND, I never could go on without the support of the forum friends. If I said it once, I will say it forever, many more times.
All my love
di :hug:

What an uplifting thread, DiMarie. There are some very lovely posts here. Isn't it nice to be surrounded by those who care and understand?

Sending hugs your way today. :hug::hug::hug:

Until i lost my daughter to cancer 6 years ago, i did not know the difference between crying, and sobbing.i learned quick.my heart feels your hearts pain.from one mom to another.

I'm so sorry Mary...warm hugs. :hug:

thanks so much for the warm hugs alffe, no one talks about her anymore, your kindness means alot.:hug:

I sat beside my amys bed, and watched her die a painful death, but with kindness and such grace. The part that really hurts so deeply, is that 6 years earlier, I got severe Guillain-Barre, and clinically died 3 times, yet lived to face the death of my child.It should have been me, not her. It should have been me.

Mary, cancer is such a monster..I lost a brother to it..but to lose a child is just the hardest thing..we aren't supposed to outlive our children. :(

Thank the Lord for our good memories of them. :hug:

Well, big hugs for both "Marys" :hug: :)

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