I want to know how to life a good life. Can anyone tell me?
 

Hi, http://bestsmileys.com/clueless/1.gif
I want to face days with fewer struggles.
Sometimes I feel that the struggles are of my own making because if I could only try a little harder, sleep at night a little earlier, cooperate in eating a better diet, find a way to clean my house so that I do not feel like I am living in squalor, be more efficient at work so I can feel more on top of things, live a mediative / contemplative life so I can feel good about my daily decisions . .

I don't know.
I don't know.
I want to feel better and I want to be a better person.

I think I know what I can do to improve things at least a few degrees, but I am already doing my best.
I wish my best were better.
Or maybe I need a whole new way of looking at this.

. . .feeling lost and frustrated.. .
sometimes I can go through the motions and feel like I am almost pulling it off. . . . these feelings only last for a few moments here and there. . . . I want the moments to turn into days and weeks and become part of my life.

I feel like I am working hard. But maybe I can work harder.

http://bestsmileys.com/working/1.gif

Is it possible to feel mostly good about how you are choosing to life your life that you have been given? Do some people achieve this?


Maybe I need to focus more on my life.
But then, I realize that I am already quite inward focussing. And I am not sure how to stretch out my limited to energy to accomplish new plans / revived goals.




M.

Mari, setting goals can be a good thing, but be realistic.

Break down those goals into steps on how to acheive them.

Which is the most important or is making a step in all more important?

I am pretty good at helping with organization in life and home. Years of being in managment and owning a business I guess. That and being a trainer.

If I can help, let me know. I'm just a PM or email away. :hug:

I hope you don't mind me poking into this forum....I'm usually on the MS forum but I saw this thread title and remembered an article I read that helped me. I'm posting the link to it here. Scroll down below the rainbow for the article. :hug:

http://www.allthingsfrugal.com/g_happylife.htm

Dear Curious,
 

Thank you.


I don't feel good.
So the first goals have to be about health.
. . . maybe sleep and exercise.
But I haven't slept right since I was a child, so that would be starting with a goad that is too hard.

Right now I exercise once a week most weeks. Maybe I can increase that to two times a week.
And maybe I can work on diet by finding new ways to fix fruits and veggies that I like -- can't really tolerate them right now due to several factors.

M.

Dear Kitty,
 

Money management and other types of life management!
Very hard unless I am feeling good.
How did you know that I stink at managing money!
I've gotten better because I have learned from hubby.
Most of the time I pretend I don't have any money to spend -- that works somewhat.


Maybe I can already have a plan in place for when I have a good day.

This is already sounding overwhelming.

Today it is going to take a big effort to show up at work
1. showered and dressed

2. on-time

Never mind that I am not prepared and did not get paper work done over the weekend.
I did rest and do laundry and those are important things.
M.

Mari, are you exercising at home or the gym?

Is the lead up to the day of exercise one of dread or do you look forward to it?

An easy way to add a little bit of exercise each day is to pick just ONE commercial time during a favorite tv show. During that break, walk in place or pick a stretch. Vary the exercise each night.

A key thing you mentioned about fruit and veggies..is that you can't tolerate them right now. Then don't. Try adding just one gass o something like V8 Fusion or V8 Splash. Maybe applesauce instead of apples.

Sleep can be a hard one. Doing cardio exercise inthe evening can rev you up and make it hard to sleep. I can do weights, yoga and stretching, but anything that get my heart rate up..then so am I all...all night.

Also sugars and caffiene.

You can do it Mari, just take those baby steps and don't try to make all the changes at once. :hug:

This is true.....I found that if I make tiny little changes I can stick with it.

For example, I decided to start walking on the treadmill. I have MS so this is a big challenge for me some days. But I imposed a 3 minute goal on myself....I knew I could easily meet that.....and did that for five straight days. I could have easily done more but I stuck to the 3 minutes a day for five days and then bumped it up to 6 minutes, then to 9 minutes, then to 12 minutes. I'm up to 20 minutes now and I can really tell a difference in the way I feel.

If I had started out at 20 minutes I would have failed first thing.

I won't start more than one challenge at a time. Too much change is overwhelming. Small, consistent changes that you can easily maintain give you the satisfaction of meeting a goal and knowing that you can follow through and succeed! :)

Hey !!!

Thanks for this thread !!! :) :hug:

Mari, I just feel exactly the same... :o
Do you feel that you cant enjoy anything ? That happen to me quite often... is like, heck, I have the life in front of me, I try to do many things, like, travelling, styding, going out and, voila ! I cant enjoy them !!!! :( Have you feel that way !? Sucks. And I just cant help it.... :(

Hey Kitty, Just read the article. Thanks. What is said is so true... I will try to do that :hug:

Mari

Sending you some hugs, and wishing I had some answers.

Sorry that you are going through this.

Donna

Hi,
I had an awful day at work.
I'm so tired and overwhelmed.
M.

:hug::hug::hug::hug::hug::hug::hug::hug::hug:

Monkey's order...take one hug as needed.

Okay Curious (Monkey)

I think that is something that everyone should do. So lets just
tell everyone to take a hug as needed.

Mari, I'm sorry you had a bad day.

Hugs from me too!:grouphug:

:hug::grouphug:

Donna

:hug: Mari :hug:

I hope you have a better day tomorrow.

barbara

Thank you.
I am trying really hard not to crash and burn.
I want to stay afloat.
I want to keep my wits about me.
M.

Mari, did you get any sleep?

:hug:

Hi,
Not yet.
Maybe shortly.
Hubby just got up to go to work.
That's my signal to get to bed because that means that it is morning already.
Sunrise happens at 6:59 am. http://bestsmileys.com/sun/3.gif

M.

Life can be hard and I know it. My dad was an abusive alcoholic, and he treated me I horribly. It always seemed like whatever I wanted got taken away before it had a chance. I hated my dad for what he did to us, and I still haven't forgiven him. But I do deal with it.

I realize that life can be hard and not everyone is dealt an equal piece of it. But what you have to realize is that there is something good out there. You have a purpose and it's a good one. People around you care about you, even if you don't realize it. Just take the time to stop and think about everything good that has happened to you, no matter how small. Even if you had a good hair day or you found a dollar in the store. I know it sounds stupid, but every little thing can help you feel better about your life and yourself. I hated my life until I started to really look at things like that. You don't have to do it all the time-I certainly don't. But even if you do it just once a week, it will help you to feel that much better about you. :hug:

What I've learned this past month Mari is I have to be here now because right now is the only moment guaranteed to you, right now is life.

HUGSS M,
not usually on this forum either, but wanted to give you HUGSSSS

even though dealing with different things, I know that feeling, of wanting to catch up on all things in life, and trying to try harder, but maybe not being able to.

try to let go of some of the goals, try to baby step things, and look at brightness when accomplish something!! do not be too hard on yourself, I think the more I think I am not doing enough, the worse behind I get...so take it baby steps...

hugsssss,sarah

Good thoughts to you Mari.

Donna

HI,
I slept until three pm and tried not to think about anything all day.

Now I have to go out and pick up meds.

My goal is to get to bed early enough so I can be rested enough to deal well with people tomorrow.
Monday was pretty yucky in how I treated people.


M.

Good luck on getting to sleep early Mari.

I really found it interesting today. I was in a case conference and
had a parent in denial that her child could be depressed. Because children
just don't get depressed, you get that as an adult. So of course he
can't till he gets older. OF course she is so he will probably when he is
older was her thought.

But now she is a believer in kids getting depressed. The big problem is
that they thought the school was at fault. And partially they might
have been. But I'm guessing he was getting worse and they didn't
have a clue.

Donna

Uff.... My mom for example, simply, cant understand/believe (or dont want to) that depression exists (even in adults) and that Im sick....

She kind of thinks that if I take antidepressives, it is because I want to feel happy and high all the time :eek:

Crap.

Dear Donna,
You are doing good work by getting family members to work better with each other and in helping kids get through school.
M.

Dear Majo,

It might be nice if anti-depressants really were "happy pills." :)

It is sooooooo hard to explain this stuff to other people. Sometimes I wonder why we even talk to them at all. :cool:
Talking to them is like talking to someone from a different planet and too much effort for the reward most times.

M.

Yeah exactly.... haha you said it perfectly !!!! That's what I have been doing recently... not talking about "my stuff" with family.... :)


Thanks for sharing.
I have always wondered if, to help others, I need to find the way to help myself first.... :rolleyes: I mean, how could I smile to somebody else if I dont even smile to myself !? Oh crap... I guess Im rambling AGAIN !

Thanks Mari

I wasn't trying to hi jack your thread.

Donna