Why? How can this happen? my friend is sick.
 

I am in total shock. My 46 year old friend was rushed to the ER. She was having clear sx of a stroke. She is vegan, organic, runs, is as healthy as a horse. Doesnt smoke, drink or eat processed foods. no family history. Takes excellent care of herself. Her hair is shiney and bright, and her skin is like cream. Blemish free. Sweet kind, and always in voluteer mode.

The stroke is massive! its affected more than 80% of her brain. She had diarrhea in the ambulance, and they did a test and it tested positive for blood, so they couldnt use the TPA or clot busting drugs. She has the best of the best insurance, so no treatment will be denied, or questioned. its all just given. Her brain has continued to swell all day. An hour ago they rushed her into surgery to removed 1/3 of her skull so the brain has room to expand as it swells. After a stroke the brain can swell for 3 to 5 days.

My crush is just the WHY?! Healthy, strong, young, no history, no risks. no birth control pills, doesnt smoke...blah blah...clean clean living. Is this what clean living gets you? We struggle so hard with MS and all the sx and BS that goes with it, and then you see a strong healthy woman one step from life support at 46! how does this happen.

Can someone help me make sense of my grief? I feel blindsided. You sort of expect this from sickly friends, but when your healthy friends start dropping, you have to start asking questions.


WHY!!!! :confused::Red eyes::Sob:

I don't know why, Dej, but I hear your fear and sadness and am sending you my love and hugs..:hug:

A prayer for your friend to heal.

same here, Dej. :(

Sending up a prayer for your friend. :hug: Maybe her clean living will help her to beat this and heal quickly. :hug:

So sorry to hear this, Dejibo. I have no answers.....just prayers. :hug:

My close friend had a large brain bleed three years ago Mothers Day (she was 55). Same thing--healthy weight, good diet, no smoking or drinking, yada yada.

Her doctors all agreed that the fact that she WAS in such good physical shape was definitely a factor in her recovery. And she did recover.

Dejibo, I'm praying for your friend now! :hug: I have read of totally healthy runners having heart attacks and strokes. It doesn't make sense, but hopefully her chance of full recovery is greater!

i'm so sorry for your friend dejibo. what a terrible thing.
only God can say why bad things happen to good people.

i'm saying fervent prayers for your friend.
and (((to you))).

Hi Dejibo,
I am sorry to hear about your friend. How terrible. The only thing that comes to my mind, is that there are some people who are born with a weakness.

Sometimes it is a weak brain vein, or main artery. An aneurism somewhere. Some are born with heart defects, yet seem totally healthy too.

We don't know what goes on in our bodies from birth. Living well sometimes helps prolong the worst from happening, or helps the person recover. Other times a normal, healthy appearing kid, can be running track and have a quick bad ending.

It is shocking for the family and friends when this happens. I hope your friend recovers without damage.

She survived the surgery to removed 1/3 of her skull to allow the brain room to swell. She is trying to talk, but upset that no ones understands what she is trying to say.

Thank you for the hugs, and prayers, and well wishes. I am trying to be positive that at her age, she has a better chance of fighting this thing, than if she was 70 or 80 and this happened.

thanks :hug:

Continuing to pray for your friend and for you. :hug::hug::hug:

I'm glad to hear the surgery is over. Just the fact that she's trying to talk and getting annoyed that nobody can understand her seems to be a good sign. She's aware of what's going on. My Dad was the same way......and he improved a little each day going forward but he was 81 when he had his stroke and didn't have overall good health on his side.

I get the feeling that she's going to amaze everyone. :) :hug:

I am so sorry to hear about everything your friend is going through right now, Dejibo!!:hug:

I'm glad to hear that the surgery is over and done with and as Kelly said, it seems to be a good sign that she is trying to talk.

I am keeping you all in my thoughts and prayers at this difficult time and hope your neighbour makes a full or best recovery she can!

Take care of yourself and if you ever need nayone to talk to, you know where I am!!

Please keep us posted when you are able to!

It is amazing that 1/3 of her skull has been removed to accommodate swelling and that she is already up and walking.

I am on the optimistic side. I see this as a good sign of a full recovery.

So sorry, Dej, to hear of this...I fervently pray that she heals and recovers so that she can live a high quality life:hug:

ditto - I am so sorry Dej but my prayers are with you! :hug:

She isnt walking. she is trying to talk, but no one can understand her. She is mumbling, and drooling. She has a helmet on her head, and she is angry about that. They shaved her beautiful head. Her hair was just thick and wonderful. now she has the sinaed oconnor look.

That she survived the surgery was a huge hurdle. now we just have to have her survive the next 48 hours. Her brain is continuing to swell, so its way to early to call if she is going to even survive this.

Its just so shocking when a healthy friend drops. sheesh.

Thanks for the hugs and prayers.

We lost my first grandchild to miscarriage, 3 months. Nobody could guess why. My granddaughter, when she was born, stopped breathing, heart stopped, could not keep food down. she required a full week in NICU.

The could not say what was wrong - she was not preemie. Fortunatly she's fine now.

Her mother though, has had at least 3 more miscarriages that I know of since her birth.

It's not for us to know why. But fair has nothing to do with it, the way I see it.

I will keep you and your friend in my prayers. Maybe that's the point, huh? To see if we'll believe and pray, to see if we'll notice when that works?

:hug:

i hope she keeps recovering.
i could be that her great health and condition will help her survive.
recovering takes time.

my prayers are still with you both.

She did well today. The brain is still swelling, but she is no longer losing ground to the deficets. She was able to speak more clearly tonight, and isnt drooling as much. She is really angry at the helmet they put on her. It feels tight, and uncomfortable with a raging headache, but I think its the swelling that feels tight, not the helmet. She is fighting strong, and ****** off, so that always makes one a good fighter.

Thanks for the prayers.

Thanks for the update...sounds encouraging.

Still praying..:hug:

I am glad she is doing better.:hug:

Holy Cow. This morning, she is talking full words, and you can understand many of them. She has stopped drooling. She HATES that helmet, but has a clearer understanding of why she needs it, and to stop pulling at it. She cannot move anything on her left side at all, and remains totally paralyzed on the left, including her face, but is working hard to speak slowly. She is emotional (as expected) but is expressing that she understands what is going on, and that she needs to be paitent, and get ready to fight. I have no idea how, but it looks like she is going to survive this. She is a strong, determined woman, and her family is very supportive. She was moved from ICU to the brain floor today. That is HUGE! now she can have visits from others, not just mom and hubby. That will help.

Thanks for the prayers, dont stop now. :hug:

Yes, I agree... it is terrible.

A colleague of mine had a stoke at MY desk at work, she was 47.
No risk factors.

Hers was traced to a small dissection of her carotid artery, which was thought to be do to exertion/lifting furniture helping her mother move. She was given tPA and she is fine now.

Another hidden cause can be what is called beauty parlor stroke.
Extending the neck back for washing at beauticians is a risk factor now, as are some chiro manipulations in the neck area.

Of course there is a-fib...which can happen any time.

I hope your friend regains her mobility. (my friend's stroke was on the right side, and her sense of humor and bits of personality were muted afterwards. It was a subtle change, but very evident to me).

Wow, Dej, that really sounds encouraging!! It'll take some hard work on her part but she sounds like she's ready for the challenge. I'm sure her overall good health will help her recover much quicker. Keep us posted!

Dej, I am just reading this and want you to know I am so happy to hear your friend is doing better. :hug: You stay strong, you've had your hands full for so long. :hug:

Moving from ICU, that is a major step in the RIGHT direction.

I am happy for her and I am also happy for you.

i'm glad the news about your friend is better today.
i'm encouraged that she's progressing. being moved to a brain unit will help in her care. she's so lucky to have a supportive family.

I'm so sorry about your friend, Dejibo :hug:. My cousin lost his 43 year old wife who was also a runner and very healthy to a massive stroke. Their daughter was only 6 at the time. It was just so shocking and horribly sad :(.

One of my dh's good friends also had a stroke about 3 years ago. He was 46. I used to work out at the same gym with him. He has 3 boys under the age of 22. He is recovering but it has been a long, tough road. His wife was a stay at home mom and now is his caregiver and the family's primary means of support. It's very hard for her so family and friends try to help her in every way possible.

It's just so hard to fathom that a young, person can suddenly be stricken like this :(.

I'll be praying for your friend and her family. They will need much support in the coming months.

Saw my friend. she looks MUCH better. She can smile evenly, can feel on her leg and arm now. and is no longer fighting the helmet, and can speak CLEARLY! :D

I went to see her son graduate high school tonight. He graduated as Salutatorian, and we are so proud of him. My hubby video taped the whole thing, so my friend can watch it over and over. The teacher allowed him to say "this is for you mom!" as he accepted his diploma. That was great!

She is being moved Monday to a premier Stroke recovery center. She has made amazing progress, and they are expecting a full recovery. Thank you so much for all the great thoughts, hugs, and esp the prayers. They are so appreciated.

I have NO idea how she is doing as well as she is, but I am not gonna give it back. In 2 months, they will put back the peice of skull they took to allow the brain to swell, and then you will never know once her hair grows back

There are miracles. There really are! :cool:

WOW, Dej....just WOW..:)

Oh..I am just reading all of this.

I will pray for your friend's continuing recovery.

:hug:

Wow, Dej, that is fantastic news!

Your original post scared the daylights out of me and I didn't dare say it, my my mom had a massive stroke and died within 36 hours. I am just elated with your friend's progress! God is good!

amazing that part of her skull can be put back (I wonder how that is done) and the hair will grow. Miracle of medicine.

I am happy for her. and you. and everyone...

i'm very happy for her and about her progress.
i'm sure her good physical condition and health has sped the recovery process.

con't prayers for your friend's full recovery.

I haven't posted on here yet because I couldn't think of the right words. I've just been reading and following it. I am so in awe of this miracle. As AMN said "God is good".

The power of prayer is awesome!!! :)