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Life
Well I broke my foot on the fourth of July. I was walking down the stairs and when I step on the next step my ankle rolled and a loud pop came right after. Swelling, pain and now I get a cast next week. Here's what just recently happened with my mom, she basically told me that I'm not her. First of all, I'm trying my hardest to get the hell out of this house and away from the drama. She is telling me that she believes I'm trying to "live" through her. I was so shocked and hurt by that, that I actually have been crying non stop for about an hour now. What kind of mother tells her own daughter that she(me) can't like or dislike the same things as her because apparently that means I'm trying to live through her. I thought that since she is my mother the children would have similar likes and dislikes that she does. I don't think my mother has ever said anything that hurt me this much in my life. I've been trying to get a life of my own for ten years now but thanks to the Epilepsy it's taking a lot longer than I expected. I know a lot of you have been through worse with your parents but coming from my mom who has always been there really hurts. Thanks for letting me vent everyone. I hope you all are doing well and enjoying your summer. :grouphug:
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((((( Tiger Lilly )))))
I am sorry you are hurting... It's not right that your mother (any mother) should say such things to their child... I'm sending you all of my extra strength and lifting you in my prayers. Keep talking... we are here for you if you need someone to lean on. :hug: Abbie |
(((Tiger Lilly))),
My prayers are with you. A few yrs. ago I fell in the backyard and fractured my ankle. I was in a cast for 4 wks. and then I had to have physical therapy 2-3 times a wk. to get my ankle better. Just be sure to cut back on the caffine or it might cause more pain. In regards to your family, my parents sent me to a boarding school out of state for 3 yrs. because they told me they couldn't deal with me and that I was uncontrolable when what it came down to in the long run was they wanted me out of the house so they didn't have to have any responsibility. I finally came back home and tried my best to prove to my parents that just because I had epilepsy I was no different. Things got better for awhile until my parents broke up after almost 42 yrs. of marriage this caused me to have more sz. from the stress and now my mom told me she won't come over to visit me anymore and she told me to stay away from her, and my father didn't talk to me for awhile but I finally got him to talk to me on the phone and he came over to visit me 3 yrs. ago. I know how you feel it really hurts when a parent disowns their kids. I've been on my own for 24 yrs. with my husband and what has helped me the most is God. You might want to consider speaking to a Pastor or Rev. they can be a big help. My prayers are with you and May God Bless You! Sue |
Thank you Sue and Abbie. I just get so sick and tired of my mom telling me "oh your just feeling that way because of your Epilepsy". Most of the time she is so off when she's telling me stuff like that. I think she's saying it to try and help herself feel better. My mom looked me dead in the eyes last night and yelled three time at me " your not me, your not me, your not me." I exploded and said "how dare you!" "I'm trying to figure out who I am without you around!" I wake up this morning and all of a sudden after 20 years of not going to church they all of a sudden want too. I'm hoping my mother prays for herself and how she's treating me but that's asking way to much. Every argument in this house is always turned around too "you can't help it, it's part of your illness" I want to fight this hard fight but right now I also just want to give up and make everyone else happier.
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Hi Tiger Lilly,
How are you doing? I hope things are going better for you and your family. For many yrs. my mom always blamed my epilepsy for the way things were in my life and both of my parents were over protective especially when I was young. The first thing you have to show yourself as well as your mom is that you are just like your average everyday person and that many people in this world can get by as well as live with epilepsy. Take a look at Elton John he's has sz. for many yrs. along with Danny Thomas, Edgar Allen Poe, Einsteen and many other famous people in this world. Don't give up just take it one day at a time and leave everything in the Lords hands. He won't give you more than you can handle. Here's wishing you well and May God Bless You! Sue |
Tiger Lilly,
It is so sad to hear what you are going through, my prayers and thought are with you. When I was young my parents, especially my mother, were over protectie because of mysz. One of the docter told my mother I didn' have epilepsy, and any time I had spell se woul always tell them that I hd a scr on my brain, which is another name for epilepsy, but sh did ot ee it that way. I agree with Sue about, the fact you need to prove to yourself and the many others around you that you can standon your own two feet in todays world. Since I develope epilepse at a very young age, it has hlp melter in life to assist ours with their handi-caps. In this world today there is no one perfect, and starting at a young age help a person b stronger. One thing that has been so helpful in my case is Church. My thoughts and prayers are with you. Christian Love, Darlene:hug: |
Hi Sue and Darlene, Well things are about the same around here. I had my cast put on my foot and found out I'll be possibly wearing it for 3 to 6 Months. Now I can't "escape" because I can't drive with this cast on. I went to therapy today it helped to just cry everything out and try to figure out how to make things a little easier on me. I've just been staying in my room just to "avoid" any possible situations for now. I was going to head back to school to try and get my CNA but now I have to put that on hold until my foot heals. I just keep telling myself "take this life one day at a time" :)
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Hello Lilly !
Sorry to read you felt hurt by your mother... :hug: :hug: :hug: In my case, is my dad... he has never understood me... NEVER... Everytime I listen to him, he is saying something negative about me... like, "she is rude, she is lazy, she is fat, when will she leave this house ? etc.... " and that hurts, so, I understand you perfectly :hug: Im glad to read you understand life has to be live day by day... and my prayers are with you so you can heal soon (your foot and your soul :hug: ) I want to move to my own flat !!! I just need more money ! :mad: Good luck. Keep talking to us. :hug: |
Tiger_Lilly, How's your foot? I hope it doesn't hurt. Also, I'm sorry about the situation with you mom. I can picture you crying because you can't go get what you want because you can't jump in the car & drive. Many of us with epilepsy don't drive. Just think how you aren't the only one. That might help.
I just took STNA (CNA) classes & am to take my test soon. However, there are hardly any jobs with this economy. |
The one thing I have learned from this web page lor is that I'm not alone. My foot is fine, it's in a fiberglass cast right now and hopefully it's healing although it's really hard to not put weight on it sometimes. I just keep praying it will heal fast. It's really hard to want to be positive in my house because I am constantly being told what to do, how to feel, that it's just my anxiety, etc. I understand completely it's hard on everyone but, when everyone starts to take out how they feel on you then you start to carry even more problems than you already have. I don't even feel like I own my life, I don't feel like I'm 29. I'm constantly trying to make everyone happy by walking around here acting like a zombie.
Blu Majo, I only want to be a CNA, I don't want to go into nursing at all...just the CNA part. There will be a Hospital opening in the next year a block from my house so hopefully my foot will heal so I can go get signed up for the cna classes. |
Hi Tiger Lilly,
How are you doing? I hope your foot is doing better. I can remember how I had to go through physical therapy for 6 months when I fractured my ankle a few yrs. ago, I found ultra sound the best help to heal my ankle. As far as your family life I want you to know I understand how you feel. I found out that once I moved out from home I felt much better and a lot more independent. My parents weren't watching me all the time and it made me realize I could do anything and I wasn't going to let my E stop me. The biggest help was having the Lord in my life. Just leave everything in His hands and all will go well for you. Wishing You Well and May God Bless You! Sue |
Tiger_lilly, I didn't mean I can see you crying only because of not driving...no way. I just thought it might make you feel better if indeed you do not drive because of E. It sounds like maybe your mom is unfortunately having trouble with the fact that you have E. Instead of saying "you are not me" she really was thinking "I am not you (I don't have E)".
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