Forgotten how it’s done
Awoke
Cut at the knees every single morning There has not been any calm Praying without ceasing Am I eased no My believing mind wants to trust that my Faith be strong enough to allow me some calm in my mind of scurry Where is he Where did my boy go Why the ultimate sorrow Worry for what This world is evil lost homes with single parents struggling to raise their children where are the absent parents and why are they not forced accountability Force them to face their children Look them in their face and have the courage why they fall short being a dad I do not speak about my ex-husband who is after being void my boys entire life and the courts step in and victimize the responsible parent Me What I am going through at this point is cruel So very cruel Void his entire life Do not even know if he hasn’t expired So angry handed it over to a lawyer Why The inept fecklessness perpetrated upon him and us his entire life and they want to give him rights Keep twisting that knife in my back Fighting hard for my children in a corrupt legal system A enterprise that rules the world many do many corrupt And I wake in sorrow to realize it’s real he’s gone Not of this earth any more To make it home before me his momma Home I want to be too Tired of the good that should be halted by lies manipulation lies lies lies the fact is this the truth be told Tired he to was I’m just saying just to find a starting point Never a place where I could It’s just been life Life on life terms No parent should ever have to endure the loss of their child We were so fortunate to have been able to have a good understanding of our place in this family So tired of all All of it The day begins And I look forward to its end already Do not want to go through today And yet I must shove all this pain and sorrow somewhere and do for those who depend upon me To date never a word from my own mother I am not okay I have nothing good to offer Just going through the motions and with an attitude Get the F out of my way My boy forever 39 Never to be held in my arms Forsaken Much if me dead |
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