Hi My Name Is Sean
 

My girlfriend Emily is in longterm recovery, over a year, from multiple concussions. Our relationship is long distance, about 600 miles from each other, though I've visited about 6 times this year. Lately things have been tough as she continues to deal with major head pain and fatigue while going to outpatient therapy and trying to get back on her feet. Because she is already worn thin from this we've not been talking much lately and when we do things are often tense. Sometimes I don't know what to say because it doesn't seem like there is much that I can say. If anyone has any advice on a situation like this I would greatly appreciate anything offered. I really love this girl and want to continue being there for her it's just tough when things are so uncertain.

Best,
Sean

Hi Sean. Sorry to hear of your girl friend's injuries.

Check out the forum below on Traumatic Brain Injury and Post Concussion Syndrome, lots of good advice to be found thee.

Also this article has some good information.


Lost & Found: What Brain Injury Survivors Want You to Know

Best to you both.

Hello seanpcook: Welcome to NeuroTalk! I hope you find the time you spend here to be of benefit. I read the article Lightrail11 gave you the link to & I don't think there's much I could add to that. My poor brain has taken a beating over the years & I can relate to quite a bit of what is written there.

It must be most difficult to sustain your relationship when the two of you live so far apart. The only thing I guess I might offer is that sometimes, at least from my perspective, less is more. I personally find that I need as much quiet as I can get. I avoid conversation of any sort to the greatest extent possible (much to my wife's consternation.) I appreciate having her near. But I simply can't tolerate a lot of yak-yak.

So, from my perspective, I would suggest that the more you can find ways to connect with your gf, without needing to converse, perhaps the better at least for now. During those times you are together, try to find simple things to do for & with her. For example, my wife likes to have her feet massaged. So I try to rub her feet with some massage cream occasionally. A lot of this you may need to discern for yourself as your relationship continues to develop. However, it is certainly fine I think to ask your gf (gently) what you can do as well. Open communication is vital to any long-term relationship. Good luck! :)