yesterday I was content
 

i have been spending most of the time reading and watching and playing with the cats. I don't feel like leaving my apartment. I spoke with my friend alice who is about my age and who adores her cats and she says she doesn't feel like leaving her house but she does. When we had dinner she was showing me pictures of her cats on her phone and I started watching her face. It was bliss.
I haven't been doing any exercises and I know what to do.Each day I wake up early and hope this is the day I will start. I don't. I keep on thinking if I can lose weight then maybe I will start. At least I took a bath. the itchiness from drinking coffee has gone away. I am drinking too much half and half. I decided a few days ago it is arrogant of me to think I don't care if I live or die. that is for God to decide. That is a big change. It is sort of like a burden off of me.
Part of the reason I don't want to leave the apartment is my difficulties in walking. I would rather ignore them.

I'm so glad that you were content yesterday :)

I completely understand not wanting to leave the apartment because you don't want to be reminded of how bad your walking is :hug::hug::hug:
But it only gets worse the more you stay in...
Can you at least walk up and down a hallway in your apartment building a couple of times once a day?

Sometimes not wanting to leave the apartment can be because of contentment, too. At times I would just rather be in the safety and comfort of my own home.

i have also been very tired. i am trying to drink more tea than coffee

I'm glad you were able to experience a day of contentment. :hug: My wife & I are tea drinkers although I'll never turn down a good cup of coffee either.

I also prefer not to leave home if I don't need to, except that we have a dog & we live in a townhome (no yard). So he has to be walked at least a couple of times a day every day no matter the weather. Fortunately the stores help out a lot with keeping me at home by not carrying much of anything I have any interest in. So shopping isn't really even a consideration.

I revitalized my old yoga practice recently. It's something I've done on-&-off over the years. I recall reading, in one of Jon Kabat-Zinn's books, that the good thing about not doing yoga is that when you finally start doing it again, you realize how much you've missed it... It's true! :Grin-Nod:

that is cute about yoga. what type of dog do you have? I shop on the internet and have food delivered...freshdirect. I think i will postpone going to the bank tomorrow. I tried yoga once but I was too hyper. I was into sports like tennis and other racquet sports. I guess I was competitive. It was fun and gave me highs. Pet your dog for me.
bobby