men with spinal cord damage..sex
 

OK. this is hard to do, but it is getting serious. Those of you who know me over the years may recall my spinal history. Without going all into that let's just say I have nerve damage from conditions and surgery.

I am numb in various places over my body. I have so little feeling in my calves you could put a cigarette out on one and I would not feel the burn.

I can walk but I stumble.

OK...now the embarrassing part. One certain place seems to be numb too that is the very thing that makes me male. Ok ok..don't laugh.

I am thinking of just simply giving up since this has gotten so frustrating and embarrassing especially when the time is right and I cannot function.

Viagra seemed to work at first but then lost its ability to cure the problem. Ever heard of that happening? I am very depressed about this and wonder if it is just all over at 55.

I know this is a touchy subject but maybe some of you have experienced the same and could give advice. I don't mind a woman answering due to their experience with husbands with nerve damage etc.

What I thought would be a fun part of retirement has left me. Very sad.

jb

Hmmmmmmmn, well I am over 55, retired, and can say I am not in your shoes. :) I think you need to talk to your family MD about it, whether the Doc be a male or female!:o

Hopefully some of the gals will speak up if no other guys here have your problem, or won't admit to it.

Jyes

At the risk of never being found out my real idendity I will put my 2cents in.
My SO just recovering from prostate cancer, has tried it all. After Viagra, he used the injections. They worked for about a year. He didn't mind the injection part into the most delicate area of a man's body, but, the window of opportunity isn't all that long. Also, the problem of having to go through the preparations can be a turn off for a partner.
The injections are the last option so now he is in the process of having a lift station installed. There is a lot of information on the web about this handy devise. Go to www.penileimplant.org/index and check out the videos of the whole works and how it is manipulated. The doctor's name is Dr. Eid.

When I was caring for patients, I had several that had had this procedure, they weren't too uncomfortable (as compared to back surgery).
Don't be afraid to ask about this. You would be surprised as to how many men are walking around with this problem and, how many have the pumps.
Good Luck
Maggie, R.N., M.S.N. (only time I will post my credentials)

Hey jb~
I used to go with a guy who, like Maggie's SO, had survived prostate cancer.

I always believe communication is a priority in a relationship, so we talked about what would and wouldn't work. We worked around what wouldn't work.

I hope I can speak freely on this delicate subject, and not offend anyone--you know me..... I'm just relaying what he said he was told. His surgeon told him that he would still be able to experience what is called a "dry orgasm", that he just wouldn't ejaculate.

I was quite surprised, but I'm a female, maybe males know these things.

Good luck!
Hugs,
Jan

Neuropathy, seen mostly in diabetics is the most common cause of problems men have with performance. But, in this case neuropathy can be a result of spinal damage. Women are susceptible to it also. There would be no problems in the area of ejaculation as it is in prostate cancer after the surgery.

J.B., I suggest you see a urologist to explore options. They are more amendable to correcting these problems than any other specialists. They have baggages full of medications, tricks, etc.

Maggie

JB, You just posted about having probs getting your BP meds authorized thru your prescription provider. Sooo, my thought is could you possibly be having ED as a result of spiney probs and HBP?? I second Maggie's advice to see a urologist. <hugs>

Theresa

It's true that BP meds alone can cause ED, but I don't think they cause numbness. Numbness of the "Saddle area" is caused by what lumbar level you dermatome know-it-alls? I can't remember.

I have it, too, which in a female is not as apparent. It just makes reaching the big O very difficult.

You have an old lumbar trouble spot don't you JB? It might be worth checking that out. Good luck and take care.

Yep C barb the lumbar is a fubar. My neuro's last words were, "avoid surgery at all costs". Today is the first day in two weeks I woke without lumbar pain so I used the opt to clean house, boat, in a frantic method knowing I'll be going down soon.

It is probably a combination of meds, lumbar that cause my problem and it seems to be getting worse...age too of course.

Welp, time to rock and roll. Going to see my old buds play at a pub tonight. They are called Catfish Flats. They have been at this for decades. I sit in with them here and there for an ABB song. Can't play that well I just look the part...heheheh.

jb

Could be a combo of meds and pudendal or other nerve damage, plus have you got a fabbo relationship going. In my experience the damage to my relationship because of all the health issues is proving very hard to overcome. I dont see why any of us should feel shy about talking about this stuff but most of us are. The doctors carve us up, but in my experience not one of them has ever asked me how I am in that way. I dont think they are trained to, and yet surely that is just as important. For the people paying though it would merely open up a whole new field of expence. Cant they see that in not so obvious ways it does anyway, ie. depression mental health issues etc. Do you understand what I'm getting at. Your sex life shouldnt stop at 55, my age also. There must be an answer so dont give up.!
Nice talking to you again.
M.x

EJ, I know this is a long shot, but I remember you posting about Effexor on the old boards. Anti-depressents can cause sexual issues. If you add Wellbutrin to the mix, sometimes it can counter the effect. Anyway, I hope you find some good answers!
Carolyn