Post surgery marital activity
 

For those of you that know, I am not married anymore, I just did not want to write the S word in my post. I am assuming people know what I mean by marital activity. I have posted in spinal disorders too and need advice as my surgeon has turned out to be a real gem of a human being.

I am 3 1/2 weeks post lumbar disectomy. L3-L4 & L4-L5. My surgeon said it was ok to resume "marital" activity. So I tried it, (normal activity,nothing wild), and my tail bone felt soar afterwards. My tailbone is still soar 2 days later. I still have sciatica as well mostly in one leg but slightly in the other too. It was the tailbone pain that brought me to he hospital emergency to begin with. I feel no better pain wise. I called surgeon to tell him and he was dismissive of me and said "he wasn't the right person to ask about those things" (meaning the activity) and the tailbone pain has nothing to do with my spine. Last I checked the tailbone is the part of the spine. Anyways I am very upset because I have fallen through the medical cracks. I have a surgeon who doesn't want to provide any post-op care. I have pain in my tailbone and am worried I have done something to myself. I have pain in legs that is not any better. I am wondering if the tailbone pain means re-herniation, or just don't do that again and it will settle down. I have nobody to talk to about this.

I wonder if you have a fractured tailbone?
Was that included when the surgeon was looking into the other back problems?

I don't think intercourse itself would have injured the tailbone, unless there is a fracture or arthritis...:confused:
but I'm just guessing ...


One of my boys bruised my tailbone or fractured it during birth, it mainly only hurt when getting up or sitting down - the pads :o & pressure on & off it mostly - took about 2 weeks to recover.

Is your hurting constantly? or on/off?

surgeons do prefer to do the surgery and send you back to primary care , but I would think a really good one would at least rx some therapy as follow up...:confused::confused:

Hi,

It's only been since Tuesday night that my tailbone is hurting. It hurt all day yesterday and I stayed in bed. I have to say it is better today but mostly hurts sitting down as you said. No I am sure it was not fractured. It hurt because of the herniated disc (L5) so that is why I went to hospital. I am trying to remain undescriptive but I think it may have been too much friction. I just worried that I did something to my L5 disc, and that is why the tailbone was hurting again. My tailbone has never hurt before the disc herniation. I just was trying to figure out if it was hurting due to pressure or could I have reherniated, and that is what I was trying to ask the surgeon and he was very mean to me I felt, and told me it has nothing to do with my spine. I just don't get it.

I guess I would give it a few days to see if it resolves , unless it gets unbearable or worsens.

might have just irritated things..

[QUOTE=Jo*mar;749532]I guess I would give it a few days to see if it resolves , unless it gets unbearable or worsens.

might have just irritated things..[/QUOTE

I guess u r right. I am just fuming at the lack of consideration of this surgeon. He never even came to see me after the surgery and I have private health fund and was in a private hospital. I have been lucky that it's been a couple of years and I have had few dealings with doctors, I have forgotten how arrogant they can come across. This guy has a superiority complex and doesn't like answering questions.

wow , I thought they always checked on pts the next day at least, unless it is a minor or day surgery.

sorry he was so crummy.. I hope his surgical skills are better than his bedside manners.

Thank you for that. I was in the hospital 6 days. He thought I was discharged and the nurses were waiting for him to release me.apparently he had told a nurse to evaluate me and she can release me if she thought I was ready to go. She only worked part- time so I only saw her once. She never came back and nobody knew what was going on. I finally had to demand to be released. Lol

Good grief?
what kind of hospital was it at?
sounds very lax on proper protocol.

Who pays for all those extra days?

No matter who pays the bills - I think I would contest the bill /days and tell the person in charge about it and ask- how this can happen??

No wonder everyone's costs go up if they are keeping pts beyond the normal and customary stay for procedures!

Almost sounds like a scam...of sorts - makes me wonder if this place does it often and never gets reported...or caught.

Aussie, sorry about your experience with the surgeon. Unfortunately, that is not an uncommon experience. As to your question, it does not sound like you did any additional damage to your spine. The tailbone pain is not unusual after you try to resume activity after surgery. People will get that when they try to resume exercising as well. The rule of thumb is to try an activity ( marital or otherwise) and see how you respond. If you experience pain, then wait an additional week and you can try again. I would recommend "going easy" if possible. You will likely find you have pain when you resume activities, but it should be less as you get further away from the surgery. Most surgeons recommend waiting 6 weeks after surgery before resuming exercise. That probably applies to sexual activity as well, though many people resume THAT activity sooner without long term ill effects.

Thank you for your reply. I appreciate your help. It felt as if the surgeon did not want to help me at all, but was sure keen to cut me open though. I will post in another week or so to discuss my progress. Thank you for support.

Aussie:)