derealization
 

Hey all,

I am struggling with this specific symptom the most at the moment. My vision is perfectly fine...but there appears to be a veil between me and everything I look at. It is more noticeable when I go outside. Things look dreamlike and I feel sort of disconnected from the world....especially talking to people. It is a scary feeling. I was wondering what others experience is/was with this particular symptom. Did it fade in time? Are there ways to make it dissapear more quickly? I've read that it is a symptom that often accompanies anxiety and intrusive obsessive thoughts...I would say that I fit that description as this whole ordeal has turned into one big obsessive thought for me and I think about it all day. I've also read that concussions can be the direct cause. I was just wondering what others experiences were.

I experienced this same thing last early December. I felt like I hadn't truly been living my life for the past month, but observing it from an out-of-body perspective. I felt this extreme emptiness, but it was not the same that I feel with the depression I have experienced. It was too weird to explain to my friends or parents, so I googled it (of course) to make sure I was not losing my mind. That gave me some relief, but at the time I had no idea that it was even related to my concussion.

Looking back, it was simply the beginning of my relapse. I suffered a concussion in mid-October and my initial symptoms were frequent crying episodes, depression, throbbing or constant headache, etc, but no anxiety. After about a month of basically bed rest, I started attending classes again. It was during final exams and I was probably pushing my brain beyond its limits. During the time, I had no idea what was going on. I didn't want to tell anyone my struggles because I associated depression and derealization with weakness. (wow, what a journey it's been since then). I thought it was all within my control and it was my fault for feeling those things. I simply did my best to ignore it and put on a smile.

After driving home from college 12 hours and being released to run and work out, I completely relapsed. Rock bottom.. couldn't function in society for months. I did find that the derealization went away after a couple weeks after I came home and basically hibernated from society.

For me, the only way I was able to overcome derealization was going home and resting--no activity besides staring at the wall and laying in the dark for the first couple months. I haven't experienced it since December and I've made tons of progress with every symptom since then. Only certain situations trigger my anxiety and I've experienced one panic attack.

I do not know your situation with school/work and if you are able to take some time off, but I hope you can get as much rest in as possible. I had to take this semester off because I literally could not function in society from an emotional aspect. If I could rewind my life 5 months, I would've taken much more time off after my initial concussion and stopped forcing myself back into daily activities. There's no point in rushing back into things if you're struggling to make it through the day- that's no way to live a life!!!

I have never experienced anxiety or depression in my entire life and I'm just now learning to cope/deal with it. It is certainly from my concussion, despite what the gp doctor told me in December (so frustrating!). I was also prescribed to Lexapro, but luckily I found a great sports medicine/concussion specialist doctor who took me off the lexapro and has been a great help.

What I've learned from my experience is if you continue to push your brain beyond its limits while you are experiencing symptoms, they certainly can get worse. A lot worse. I'm not trying to scare you or be harsh, but help you. I really wish I knew all this back then. I know the emotional aspect of PCS can be extremely tough because you have no idea who you are anymore. It is scary, especially when you are being thrown into social settings. But you have to have hope and the sooner you let your brain rest, the quicker you'll recover. I have moments where I feel like myself and it's amazing! Just know that you are not alone in this battle. My prayers and best wishes.

Kelly

kelly --- don't you think that once you start feeling a little better ... its almost healthy to get out a bit? Like an hour a day...or is that pushing it too much?

I went out to Target yest (friend drove) and lunch here (2 hrs total) ...headache came on much later...4 hours...and I feel like crap today.

The only thing I did today was go to the chiropractor and get 2 nails fixed..(an hr total).

Yes..getting symptoms...head hurts in the back..etc...but I think I NEED to be out of the house for my sanity a little each day.

Do you agree??

I can't watch much tv...20 mins at a clip...computer 10 mins at a time...so sitting around staring at the walls will make me really go crazy!!

I've felt that odd disconnected feeling also, I'm present but not really connected to anything even when I'm talking to someone I just don't feel like I'm all there. I still occasionally experience that symptom when I'm worn out/overtired/overstimulated but it is much less often and less severe. It will get better eventually, just be patient. Let your brain rest. Less = more recovery. Stinks, but it's the truth!

Went out to eat saturday night with three couples when there was conversation going on it just felt like i was not involved,even when i was actually talking. It just felt like i wasn't really there. Like my body is but not my soul. Anybody else feel like this?:confused:

Yes! Have had the feeling that I am just observing rather than 'being' here. It's strange, often feel quite detached from thngs.

yep that's exactly how I feel...I could learn to live with the physical symptoms knowing that they should fade...but the sleep problems and that disconnected feeling are difficult to cope with

Know what you mean..... I have a hunch/theory that exercise might help get rid of the disconnected feeling....I can't do much at the moment but once the physical symptoms have faded might try swimming ....I've been doing shiatsu stretches the past couple of days and they are very gentle so it's a start. Maybe it's about getting your brain to re-engineer all the connections with your body (?)

I've been doing some stretches. It seems that is fine...and I have a spin bike..so I'm trying that too. Kills time..alone in the house without much other stimulation.

anyway...we had more snow here today - and walking outside in the slush in 33 deg sure isn't my cup of tea

OHHH MYYYY GOSHHHHhhhh - SHEW! I thought I was the only one!
 

I am SOOooOOOoooOO glad you posted this! I was actually declared DOA at the scene of my injury... loaded on life-flight... revived... and coded a few more times.
I have over and over again thought to myself;
"maybe Im actually dead and just dont realize it yet...:eek:?" (YEAH IT SOUNDS CRAY!!) SERIOUSLY though... I have actually verbalized to a few people how I feel like Im on the inside of my own body but I only "partially" occupy it .... I see someone elses nose, their hands... I feel my mouth moving but, in whole, I feel incredibly detached from my body. I dont know how else to explain it.

So NO, you are not the only one.... nor am I (thanks to your post - thanks):D