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oh Curious.............you are needed here!
:D looks like your kinda place :D
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Are we really going to let her loose in here??? Is it safe???
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Yeah, where's Curious??? She may not be safe, but she's always fun! :rolleyes:
I'll start off the jokes: If a man speaks in the forest where no woman can hear him, is he still wrong? |
Kids In Church
3-year-old Reese:
"Our Father, Who does art in heaven, Harold is His name. Amen." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ A little boy was overheard praying: "Lord, if you can't make me a better boy, don't worry about it. I'm having a real good time like I am." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ After the christening of his baby brother in church, Jason sobbed all the way home in the back seat of the car. His father asked him three times what was wrong. Finally, the boy replied, "That preacher said he wanted us brought up in a Christian home, and I wanted to stay with you guys." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I had been teaching my three-year old daughter, Caitlin, the Lord's Prayer for several evenings at bedtime. She would repeat after me the lines from the prayer. Finally, she decided to go solo. I listened with pride as she carefully enunciated each word, right up to the end of the prayer: "Lead us not into temptation," she prayed, "but deliver us from E-mail. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ One particular four-year-old prayed, "And forgive us our trash baskets as we forgive those who put trash in our baskets." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ A Sunday school teacher asked her children as they were on the way to church service, "And why is it necessary to be quiet in church?" One bright little girl replied, "Because people are sleeping." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Six-year-old Angie and her four-year-old brother, Joel, were sitting together in church. Joel giggled, sang, and talked out loud. Finally, his big sister had had enough. "You're not supposed to talk out loud in church." "Why? Who's going to stop me?" Joel asked. Angie pointed to the back of the church and said, "See those two men standing by the door? They're hushers." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ A mother was preparing pancakes for her sons,Kevin 5, and Ryan 3. The boys began to argue over who would get the first pancake. Their mother saw the opportunity for a moral lesson. "If Jesus were sitting here, He would say, 'Let my brother have the first pancake, I can wait.' Kevin turned to his younger brother and said, "Ryan, you be Jesus!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ A father was at the beach with his children when the four-year-old son ran up to him, grabbed his hand, and led him to the shore where a seagull lay dead in the sand. "Daddy, what happened to him?" the son asked. "He died and went to Heaven," the Dad replied. The boy thought a moment and then said, "Did God throw him back down?" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ A wife invited some people to dinner. At the table, she turned to their six-year-old daughter and said, "Would you like to say the blessing?" "I wouldn't know what to say," the girl replied. "Just say what you hear Mommy say," the wife answered. The daughter bowed her head and said, "Lord, why on earth did I invite all these people to dinner?" |
13 Things PMS Stands For
13 Things PMS Stands For:
1. Pass My Shotgun 2. Psychotic Mood Shift 3. Perpetual Munching Spree 4 Puffy Mid-Section 5. People Make me Sick 6. Provide Me with Sweets 7. Pardon My Sobbing 8. Pimples May Surface 9. Pass My Sweat pants 10. Puky Mood Syndrome 11. Plainly; Men stink 12. Pack My Stuff and my favorite one ... 13. Potential Murder Suspect Pass this on to all of your hormonal friends and those who might need a good laugh! Or men who need a warning. And remember: Money talks .... but Chocolates SING |
par-tay on!
whoohooo! my kinda place! i got the funniest thing grandmonkey does. he is 4...5 in 30 minutes, but tell him that. ( i'll elaborate on that later) he really is a smart little guy. i way proud of him. this morning he was in his room playing. i could hear him counting. 1..2...3 up to 30. then 30...29....28... wow huh? so i ask him to come count backwards for me and pawpaw. he stands so straight and tall ( all 42 inches of him)...proceeds to turn his back to us....1...2....3.... hehehe..yep...HE was backwards counting. ok...so the turning 5 is tramatic for him. :eek: pawpaw (hubbymonkey) told the little guy that he was going to be a big boy when he turned 5. so as we watched some tv together..him cuddled on my lap before bed..he said "meme...this is my last night to EVER be on your lap. i want to stay 4." :( i ask him why? he says...bubba is a big boy and he doesn't sit on your lap. lol...bubba is 17! ok...i'll eat some choccy and be back. :D nuf monkey stories |
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where are the stripes and polka dots? you know how i am with cans of paint. :D i could save some of the stuff from my garage sale and decorate it up a bit. how about the used coffee caraffe' from my mil? the one with old coffee inside that she swore she bought new? lol |
hehehe
what a great thread to wake up to! "happy 5th birthday to grandmonkey" :p http://www.geocities.com/longnwash/MonkeyCake.JPG and trekker......... ya had me chortling with delight at those!! keep 'em comin' :D |
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