How are you today?
 

Does every time some one ask you that it feels like they are saying what is wrong with you why arent you normal yet. Like it is your fault? No matter how I tell my self that they just care and wish I was better every time it still makes me want to yell stop it and just leave me alone.

Man all of my friends do this...so irritating.

One question and one statement I still don't know how to answer.

1. How are you? - Lie or tell the truth which no one wants wants to listen or care.

2. You look great - I wanted to say lot of things but I look at them blank.

Yes...Even my husband. Everyday he has a way of asking me how I am that makes me feel like he thinks my TBI is just going to spontaneously disappear after a good nights sleep, a pill, or just poof it's gone. He's a good guy, but he really still doesn't have a clue...Perhaps it's denial.

Or they ask, "how are you?"
So you answer, to make life easier, "Okay"
and they ask, "Just okay?"

WHAT DO THEY FRIGGIN' WANT????? Take my answer, or don't ask, because you know darned well you really don't want to really know.

At this point I usually say, "No, but it's the politically correct answer."

And, of course, you can see they have already stopped listening or are turning away as soon as you get the word "No" out. :mad:

I respond according to how I feel.
I'm having a rough day.
I've got an exploding headache.
I feel pretty good today.

It seems to help the people close to me know if I am up for interaction or if they should run away as fast as they can!

I gess I'm not the only 1 . I've given up on friends and family . because if you don't get it by now you never will . And I don't have time to stress on what they don't understand .I I I have even found out that people that have only met you 2 or 3 times briefly. have a opinion of what I should be doing in my life . I have heard you got a headache take tylenol or aspirin it'll go away. when you tell them that doesn't work they look at you like you're full oh **** and a deadbeat . I'm just sick of all of it . I truly believe that if you cannot do for others they don't want to do for you . there is an old saying. if you count your friends on more then one hand . you do not know what friendship is . thanks for the therapy . hope you all have a good day .

I've experienced this too, with both family and friends. Hopefully as awareness about PCS increases (thanks in part to the number of professional athletes being sidelined with concussions), this problem will become less common over time.

I think sometimes people "just don't want to know" because it represents a profound challenge to their world view, relationships, expectations of the future, etc. So they go into denial.

For the very few family and friends who genuinely asked me "what's it like going thru what you are going thru?"

I tell them,

"Imagine you are waking up from a deep sleep and you are aware that your brain/mind is not as sharp as when you are completely awake, but that it's really like it's that 24/7, and it's taking a really long time to wake up.
Oh yeah, there are headaches that are unimagineable, and anxiety from wondering when will it end."

Of course your experiences may vary.

Mike

I help others understand by explaining a few symptoms in terms that they understand. For example:

When I come to a stop sign and look to the left, I notice if there are any cars coming. When I look to the right to see if there are any cars coming, I have already forgotten what I just saw to the left.

My work-around is to repeat to myself, "No cars from the left" as I look to the right. Now I have a single item in auditory/verbal memory and a single item in visual memory.

I also explain that I cannot visualize any more. That 'mind's eye' is not there any more.

I have other symptoms that get a bit more complex that I only explain to those who are interested.