SEVERE anxiety problems - feel like I've lost it.
 

So there is something I've been dealing with for about 3 weeks now. I'm not sure if it's anxiety or some kind of damage to my brain that's slowly driving me insane. It usually starts first thing when I wake up...I just feel like I'm not right in the head, like I've gone crazy and should be in a mental hospital. It's not because of headaches [I hardly have them and they don't bother me when they come], or any other symptom...I just feel like I'm doomed, I don't know..Trying to explain it is kinda hard. I have these flashes of thoughts, bad thoughts like hurting people or myself[intrusive thoughts?]..But I would never do something like that, it's just thoughts and when they happen I try to get them out of my head because that's not stuff I normally think about. It takes me awhile to snap out of it and start feeling normal. Sometimes I can't snap out of it and it lasts all the way until 3-4am when my brain finally gets so exhausted it falls asleep. Then I wake up and it's back again. I've been taking a small dosage of Ativan which seems to be working, it's a lot easier to snap out of the going crazy feeling while I'm under the effects. But when I don't have the Ativan it's allllloooot worse. Sometimes I cry and scream out loud "WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME!" or "SNAP OUT OF IT!" lol...

When I look up symptoms of severe anxiety disorder I see similar symptoms that I'm going through and reading about them kinda makes me feel better...especially when I read stuff that suggests your not going crazy your just stressed out and it's anxiety. But something inside me keeps suggesting that it's probably not anxiety and it's something else...especially since it lasts sometimes all day - and sometimes for days at a time.

I'm going to ask this new neurologist that I'm going to see to refer me to a neuropsychologist, because I know that's what I need...But, I was wondering if anyone else here is dealing with this or has dealt with it and how they overcame it? I know taking Ativan is not the right solution. It's helping, but I don't want to be taking narcotics the rest of my life or however long I have PCS and these psych problems. There's gotta be something else I can do...

Baby steps towards a calmer state
 

I haven't experienced anywhere near this level of anxiety, but I've definitely had some anxious stretches (mainly early on in my recovery). I actually had a panic attack in the middle of the night that my girlfriend had to talk me through by phone. That had never happened to me before.

On a general level, I would say do anything and everything that helps you calm down, rest, and relax - even if it's just 5 or 10 minutes here and there to start. Think small steps. The main thing is learning (it can take practice - be patient) to get yourself into a state that allows your brain to heal.

A few things that have helped me include keeping the lights off or low, taking a hot bath, lying down on the couch or in bed for 20-30 mins (in comfortable clothes or PJs under a blanket or duvet), meditation, going for a walk outside, listening to some calming music for 15-20 mins, getting some fresh air (even by opening a window), getting some exposure to natural surroundings or green space (again, even through a window), making something simple to eat, minimizing caffeine and sugar intake, talking to a friend or significant other in person or by phone.

Note that one of the threads running through these strategies is keeping stimulation levels low as much as possible.

And patience - recovery can proceed very slowly and take weeks, months or years.

Thanks for the suggestions.

VERY GOOD ADVICE!!!!!!!!!
I'm normally on the Thoracic Outlet Syndrome forum but this post caught my eye due to the fact that I too have suffered some pretty awful post surgical anxiety/depression. I have managed to steer clear of meds ( which the doc was all too quick to try and throw at me). Instead I opted for the self-help option. I managed to get my doctor to refer me to do CBT ( cognitive behavioural therapy) it enables you to find techniques that are suited to you and your interests to work through your struggles. Basically you set yourself daily goals and make a plan of action/activities to which you try and commit to so that the focus comes away from the issue that is troubling you. Try anything that you personally find relaxing and soothing and then ensure that you allocate some "me time" to do the chosen activity.
The dark doesn't last....... find your light, be it meditation, music, gentle exercise, helping others even?????? Whatever it takes to make you feel calmer/lighter..... but remember: its up to you to walk towards it!
BEST WISHES to all:grouphug:!!!!!!!

Wow. I'm sorry you're having such a hard time. I'm not sure how long you've been dealing with PCS but in the beginning I had a "fog of doom" feeling. I couldn't think right and didn't have happy thoughts for sure. It took about three months for that to start shaking off. I did have headaches daily as well so I'm not sure if that was a big factor in that. It sounds like seeing someone is a good idea. I know that medication is a concern. It is for me as well but until I see the therapist it'll have to do. I think the medication is ok if it goes along with some cognitive therapy. That will allow you to go off the medication that much quicker.

I will say I still have headaches daily but they aren't as dibilitating as they were in the beginning. I have anxiety and an awful whooshing sound in my head that just wont go away.

I also know breathing is a great way to calm your mind down. It takes discipline to do so. Just ten minutes in a quiet area a day will help.

I hope your having a better day today. :0)

yeah, I can relate. my anxiety goes through the roof for hours on end and I just want to scream. nose drives me insane but I don't want to yell at people. I just keep hanging in there and seeing my pscychiatrist. get all the help you can.

Sounds like Anxiety
 

Since my accident I have had a hard time getting negative thoughts out of my head.

Every time my kids go out in the car I expect them to be in a accident or for some other disaster to fall on us.

I must admit in the 18 months since my accident, one child had a car accident, a neighbour borrowed my car to drive me somewhere and hit another car (2 at fault accidents Yippee). My furnace, air conditioner and roof all had to be replaced.

Trying to live on Disability is really a challenge and I image all kinds of things that will go wrong that will challenge my resources. I worry about the dogs getting sick and how I would pay the vet bill.

It is hard when you have a lot of time on your hands and not much to fill them. I can't read or watch t.v. so finding a distraction is hard.

Meditation really helps, it replaces negative tapes with positives one and keep positive thinking close by.

I still stumble but I keep going forward with as much positive thoughts as I can.

Good Luck

I had a massive anxiety attack after my accident that lasted six hours, it was horrific. I swear a strong coffee set it off so I avoid them now. I went for a walk to burn off the nervous energy, had a cold shower (this really helped), and just told myself that "it's only temporary" (that became my mantra). On tip that really helped was holding my breath! So many people try to "control" their breathing during an attack that they make themselves worse. Attacks happen cos basically u r breathing out more carbon dioxide than you are inhaling, so stop breathing out! I held my breath for 14 seconds and did 5 sets. It seemed to work for me. I then breathed in thru the nose for 5 seconds, held it for 3 seconds, and then exhaled thru the mouth for 7 seconds. It's a very scary experience and I think everyone deals with it differently, it's finding your comforts. I would say bare in mind that u aren't in any real physical danger. Good luck.