My 4 year old's behavior...what's wrong?
 

Hello, I was hoping someone may be able to suggest what may be wrong with my son from your own experience with similar behaviors. He is currently awaiting an evaluation but I would like explore ways to handle these behaviors as soon as possible because he will be going to kindergarten in the fall. He was removed from his Head Start class room and entered into homebased program until he has an evaluation and wraparound services to be able to better manage his behavior. Some of the behaviors he often displays are...
Impulsiveness
Aggression (hitting other children and teachers)
throwing and breaking things
Extreme tantrums when he doesn't get his own way
makes false statements like: "you said you were going to cut me with a knife", "you said you were going to kill me" (most of the time smiling as he says it)
Says things like he hates me, he wants to kill or hurt others (sometimes smiling, sometimesmad when saying these things)
sensory issues- will not wear certain shoes, hates socks, often takes off clothes or complains about how they feel, will throw a fit is I hand him a cup that is wet, will cry or scream about some music on in the car and will get mad if myself or his sister sings the song, as a baby I would have to take his coat and hat off when he was in the car and car seat, as a baby he would never eat babyfood or baby cereal
He was a very fussy baby and woke up several times a night until he was 1 1/2
he get very upset if something is not exactly how it should be like if food tears or a piece of a toy will not fit together exactly how it should.
He is very smart although he rarely seems to focus his attention long enough to learn much. He loves movies, super heros, and his Nintendo DSi and doesn't put much attention in anything else. His moods seem to fluctuate often from very affectionate and loving to mean and aggressive. I see many similarities with early onset bipolar, adhd, and even considered Asperger's. He doesn't have any autistic like hand gestures or stance, and no odd or repetitive speech patterns (if that matters much for aspergers dx).

Any thoughts or suggestions are really appreciated!

Hello better2morrow and welcome to NeuroTalk.

My first thought based on some of your information was Sensory Integration Disorder (SID).

This link will give you some information about Sensory Integration Disorder and you can judge for yourself if your child "fits."
http://medical-dictionary.thefreedic...ation+Disorder

Unfortunately, until your chid is evaluated it is impossible to know what may or may not be going on with him.

As you know, with any child there are no "quick" fixes. This us a life-time of behavior mod. and stuff. I am a big believer of a behavior mod with "talking". Be sure child knows in an age appropriate way what behaviors are wanted. Be consistent in things and try to be unemotional, it is the behaviors, not the child you don't like. Finds a professional or whatever whose approach seems right to you, everyone will offer their opinions. Start slow, don't overwhelm child and self and set you both up for failure. "Rewards" can be simple and unspoken as a smile from you or reading a book.

This is tough stuff and very hard for you. Be strong, good luck. You deserve support too.

I would be working with the team that is going to do the evaluation.

Ask specifically what they are going to evaluate:
1. Make sure they will do sensory issues.
2. Speech doesn't sound like its a issue. If it is have this checked.
3. Behaviour issues, not exactly sure how they do it at this age. But it should be able to be done.
4. If you even think autism, have the testing done. Its completely paperwork by parents, and school. And now would be better for start than later.

5. Make sure they do a complete cognitive testing, I think I'd also have a reality vs fiction type testing too.

I am around if you have questions.

Donna:grouphug::hug:

I'm in the same boat!
 

My 4 y/o is the same way... not about killing ect... but acting identical in the other ways. It's actually typical of this age. They are testing boundaries please don't resort to medicine :( Consistency is key and lots of times the teachers at head start seem to push for kids to be medicated to make life easier on them. Google gifted children and you will find that all of these traits are actually of extremely intelligent children... Something worth looking into.

My daughter had some similar things at that age. She was evaluated and they said that she was exhibiting "unusual behaviors" and that she "needed services", but they weren't comfortable making a diagnosis that young. They told me then "potential ADD, potential ODD". She also had a slight speech issue, basically she'd get mad when she couldn't think of the word she wanted to say fast enough and throw a fit. So for that, they qualified her in speech therapy, and then she received that plus occupational therapy and physical therapy. Sounds like he has some sensory issues. Hopefully, they can help him with some of those and when he's more comfortable then some of the behaviors will ease up. It was that way with my girl. She was even out of the special ed program for 2 school years, but she's back in as of this year. She is 9 now and was recently dianosed with Asperger's and depressive disorder. This is the first official diagnosis we have received. It is a long process. You need to be vigilant and make sure they do all the tests, advocate for your child to make sure the school district accomodates him and provides all the services to which he may be entitled, and be patient. A diagnosis may be several years off. I wish you both the best.