How do I cope?
 

Hello,

my mother had a ruptured aneurysm in august 2011, she had surgery and was very lucky, she has no limitations or anything, except for being tired and occasional headaches.
About four weeks ago she fell and after a week or two she was rushed to the hospital again. The fall cause some bleeding from a weak blood vessle so it seems. Again, they did some surgery and she's been home for almost a week now. She's doing very good and we're all happy.
Now, it seems as I have developed some sort of anxiety, like I can't sleep properly and eating, well it works but I just feel weird. I always think about what could have happened or what not. I caught myself checking on her when she sleeps and ask her how she's feeling all the time.
I'm considering a therapist to help me figure this out but I'm not sure. I know this sounds so crazy but I'm just really confused and scared :confused:

Hello, nice to meet you.

You know, I think people forget the enormous emotional toll that aneurysms take on the loved ones, friends and families. You are the hidden victims - because when we (the patient) are going through it, we don't remember much of it, and rely so much on people to do everything for us - from personal care in the early days, to becoming the housekeeper, chaffeur, companion, appointment manager and the list goes on.

It's a long road for everyone, and often times adjustments have to be made to our lives in the long term. It is only natural for you to be scared and concerned about the future. You have now been confronted with your mother's mortality and that is so scary - you are also in a situation where you have no control and that is scary too.

I think it would be really good for you to talk to a professional - or even a trusted friend about your feelings before it becomes a major problem.

I wish your mum, and you, all the best and try to remember that you have all been through a terrifying time. Your mum has had a lucky save, and is even more lucky to have a daughter like you who cares so much about her.

Keep us posted

Lyn

Thank you Lyn for your kind words. It seems as I have calmed down a little but I will definitely go to a professional to talk about it. I have talked to a close friend too but I think its better to talk to someone who will tell you what's going on rather than what you want to hear (as friends tend to do).