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-   -   It's time to shut up! (https://www.neurotalk.org/the-stumble-inn/168108-time-shut.html)

Blessings2You 04-13-2012 04:44 PM

It's time to shut up!
 
:D After a certain time of day, maybe 4:30 or 5:00 (we go to bed early) my husband starts to wince when I talk, kind of like I was poking a stick in his ear. Bless his heart, that's probably what it feels like!

I try to remember not to yap, but even if I don't have anything to say, I say it anyway. :rolleyes:

SallyC 04-13-2012 06:41 PM

Maybe you could text each other..:D

My DD & I sometimes get on each others nerves on the phone, so we text a lot. I like it..LOL.:cool:

doydie 04-13-2012 11:19 PM

That's about the time of day that even though my body has been awake for awhile my mind has just now woke up

Dejibo 04-14-2012 06:25 AM

I would write. journal or go play on the computer if he has reached his limit of wifely chatter. My DH does the same. He politely listens, but you can tell he just wants to melt into the couch.

ANNagain 04-14-2012 01:17 PM

Neurontin made me quite talk-y and I am not a shy person. ;) Really, I talked my head off and there was not a conversation because if any one tried to reply I would quickly say that I had to finish or I'd forget what I was saying.

I did not make any friends and even stepped on my Mom's toes. Glad to be off of that.
ANN

Kitty 04-14-2012 02:36 PM

When my DH was alive we actually had the exact opposite problem. I was on the phone all day at work.....and I really didn't want to talk alot at home. I just needed to decompress after a day of all day talking. He, on the other hand, didn't talk alot at work and was ready to chat when he got home. The years he worked nights it worked well. Once he went to days it got a little dicey. :o I wasn't used to someone always commenting on things I did! :p

msarkie 04-14-2012 11:35 PM

I used to be chatty, but now I have trouble putting together a complete understandable sentence. Talking is just too much trouble, and even when I think I'm listening things seems to go in one ear and out the other without stopping in between. I do enjoy texting with my DH, we have a lot of fun with it. One day he had me rolling on the floor in an antique store because he was texting me suggestive comments in German ( which neither of us actually speaks!). He's pretty good about not talking to me when I'm too tired to listen, or trying to make me talk. His mom drives me nuts, though. I don't want to hurt her feelings, but I think I'm eventually going to have to tell her, "I'm sorry, but I'm just really to tired to have a conversation right now." I think she would probably try to have a heart-to-heart about why I felt that way! And how long, and what could she do, and would tomorrow be better? etc, etc. I love her, but she is TOTALLY clueless.

mrsD 04-15-2012 07:00 AM

You know, that time of day? That is when the cortisol secretion is the second lowest for the 24 hr period.

This is when pain, may become more prominent, or other symptoms of inflammation. I'd ask your hubby if he is in some kind of discomfort, to make sure there isn't a medical reason for his being crabby.

There is a serious medical symptom called sundowning. It is associated with Alzheimer's dementia, and is the depletion of some neurotransmitters, that run the brain. I hate to bring this up, but one should consider if everyday, he runs "down" like this. If you tell a doctor they will test for early onset Alzheimer's most likely. I would keep this to myself and not alarm him. (I don't share scary things with my husband as he is doctor phobic). I have some supplement tricks that may help if it is just fatigue or pain however.

Men don't like to talk as much as women though. This is one reason I think cats are so good for us as we age. My kitties put up with lots of chatty venting with me, in fact! :p:D
I've got this new kitten, who is currently in my avatar. She is extremely gifted for communication. She will now shake her head and flick her paw when I ask a question and the answer is "no". She has just increased this behavior.
example: Want to go out? She'll check the temp and whether it is raining or wet, and if too cold or too wet, she shakes her head and if extreme will shake her paw. I've seen her do it outside too, when something displeases her. None of our other cats react to questions like this...so it just must be HER talent. I find it cute, that I get answers back sometimes. Granted they are feline answers, but they are answers of a type! I am beginning to call it the "ick" response! LOL

Blessings2You 04-15-2012 07:41 AM

My mom was a sundowner (she did have Alzheimer's). By bedtime, she was an entirely different person.

Just want to clarify, he isn't really crabby...in other words, he doesn't snap at me or whatever. Just looks like my yapping is coming at him like a swarm of gnats! He has NEVER been one for chit chat, whereas I am the poster child. I'll follow him right down the hallway clarifying myself, putting it in different (more) words. :rolleyes:

I think what happens is, as he gets tired at the end of the day, he even LESS wants to endure chattering. As I get tired at the end of the day, I seem to lose the ability to flip the shut-up switch!

mrsD 04-15-2012 09:26 AM

Men are less verbal than women. Processing words is not easy for them all equally.

When training people who work with seniors, we are told to speak slowly, carefully, etc, because as people age they cannot follow fast talking.

This reminds me of the new show, Scandal. I watched the first episode on OnDemand yesterday.... after seeing the original person it is based on, featured on CNN morning show.
Boy did they talk fast. So I looked them up on IMDB and there is even a thread on their forum about not being able to follow the dialog. I watched episode 2 this morning with breakfast and already they are slowing down some. I suppose the target audience of this fascinating well done show is mostly over 40.

So if you are aware of sundowning, I won't go further with it.
But following verbal communication cognitively can be one sign of it, as well as general aging. I know for myself at my age, often less is more for me at times. But I am still more verbal and energetic than my husband, by far, who tends to be quiet most of the time.


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